Solar Four
by Aline Riva
Summary: Set 27 years after Starman: Jenny Hayden's brother Martin survives a space disaster. Three years on, a Starman many years ahead of Jenny's visitor tracks down Martin to learn about humanity - through recalling Martin's memories of the crew of the tragic Solar Four. But Martin finds out the Starman is hiding a dark secret - and he is the only one who can help. Main pairing is Slash.
1. Chapter 1

**Solar Four**

* * *

**Summary:**

**This story, a future based fic, follows on and is set 27 years after the events of the movie Starman.**

**Jenny Hayden's now grown up son is a brilliant scientist who teaches at the local university – but he still does not know the purpose of the glowing orb left to him by his alien father before his birth.**

**Jenny and Scott are excited when Jenny's much younger half brother Martin Lee is chosen as a pilot for the Solar Four space Mission, even though Scott also applied for the mission and was turned down because of his lack of experience – the only cosmologist on board will be his older former colleague, Doctor Sebastian Vernon, or 'Vern' as he's known to his friends. While mother and son watch the launch of the mission, Jenny's thoughts turn briefly to her own link to the stars, a link that has never felt closer than it does at that moment...**

**Then disaster strikes when the Solar Four is forced to abort the mission shortly after reaching orbit – the crew return to earth but the craft crash lands, killing three of the five crew members instantly when the cabin shears in half and explodes in a ball of flame. The only survivors from the mission are Jenny's brother Martin and his co-pilot and closest friend, Doc Vernon – but Vern is so badly injured he will never recover from the crash.**

**Three years after the Solar Four disaster, Martin, who is haunted by the day of the crash, gets a call from Jenny urging him to come home because Vern's condition has worsened and he does not have long to live. Martin returns home to his sister and her son Scott and feels the memory of the Solar Four disaster weighing heavy all over again. **

**Then Martin's life is changed forever by a visit from a man who claims to be from the stars - from a world far beyond earth, who says his ancestor once visited earth and gave a child to Jenny Hayden.**

**Martin is sceptical at first until the man who calls himself Adam shows him the smart technology built into his tattooed arms that serve as everything from interstellar maps to controls that can record and process memories.**

**He explains that he has come to Earth because in his time, many hundreds of years after the Starman's visit, there has been a war on his planet and now the population have been forced to adapt by becoming synthetic cyborgs and along the way, much has been lost about the teachings gained from studying the human race. He tells Martin he is here to record and process and learn about human emotions and values. **

**Using Martin's memory of the year he spent training with the other members of the doomed Solar Four team, he begins to witness Martin's past and learn about love and friendship and trust and all the reasons why human beings are able to think and feel the way they do. Along the way, Adam begins to understand his own growing feelings and comes to see that relationships are not purely for reproductive purposes, and that there can be more than one kind of love match and pairing in this world...**

**As Adam and Martin get closer, Adam reveals there is _another_ reason why he was sent to the earth at this time in history - and then Martin is faced with a terrible shock when the truth is revealed and finds himself begging his Starman to help alter the situation - _because the future of the Earth is now at stake and he is the only one who can make a difference..._**

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**Rated T.**

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**Disclaimer: I own nothing, this is a work of fan fiction.**

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**Author Notes: This story contains some adult situations, some strong language and the *main* pairing in this story is Slash.**

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_**This book is Dedicated to Lee Berry**_

_**The idea of the tattooed man from the stars was yours. **_

_**I hope I write it as well as you imagine it could be.**_

_**This is also for you for all the years I have known you and for all the good times and the friendship.**_

_**And this is also dedicated to all the dreams men dare to dream that burn as bright in their hearts as the stars in the sky.**_

_'**Written in my soul from me to you'**_

_**~ Bob Dylan, Tangled up in Blue ~**_

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Chapter One

***Jenny***

Jenny Hayden was watching the TV screen.

She didn't take her eyes off the news report as she called to her son.

"_Scott!"_ She yelled excitedly, _"Hurry up!"_

"I heard you Mom!" He called back from the hallway, "Give me two seconds..."

Jenny's dark hair had a single streak of grey that ran through it and although it had been close to thirty years since she had been given the miracle of her son Scott, the child she thought she would never conceive, Jenny Hayden did not feel or look her age.

Right now, as she watched the screen and thought about the journey that was about to begin, she started to feel a lot of things:

_Once there had been a man who came from the stars, who came to earth to learn about humanity._

_He had loved her but been forced to leave and return to his own planet because he could not survive on earth any more than she could have lived in his world._

_Few knew about the man Jenny Hayden had once known._

_The Starman had said his son would become a great teacher – and he had, he was a young and brilliant professor of science who taught students at the local university._

_He still had the glowing sphere that his father had left him. He kept it in a metal box in his bedroom and every once in a while he would take it out, handle it and look at the skies while he wondered what its purpose was. _

_But the sphere had grown cold and heavy and all Scott Hayden Jnr knew for sure was that the time was not now; when the time came he would know what the purpose was for his father's gift..._

Then Scott walked through the door and Jenny looked at him and thirty years fell away as she thought how much he resembled his father.

"Come here!" She said, pushing away thoughts of the past that made her heart ache, "You don't want to miss this!"

He sat down on the sofa and ran his fingers through his fair hair as he checked his watch and then looked at the clock on the wall.

"They're not leaving yet! The launch isn't for another fifteen minutes!"

Those thoughts were still turning around in her mind:

_The crew of the Solar Four space mission were preparing for take off._

There were five people on this mission to fly the super powered long awaited Solar Four into space, where they would be able to manoeuvre the craft around Mercury and Venus, passing as close to the sun as their heat shields would allow, before skimming the orbit of Mars and returning to Earth once more.

_She remembered her man who came from the stars and thought again how little the astronauts knew about the world they were stepping into._

_There was so much more out there than most people realized, more than most could even dream of in a lifetime..._

_Jenny had never felt closer to the world beyond the stars than she did at this moment, because one of the men on that mission was her younger brother, Captain Martin Lee._

He was her half brother and although she had seen him now and then over the years, she had only really got to know him closely over the twelve months he had been living close by at the space center training for the mission, but she felt at that moment as if she had known him well for her whole life.

_At that moment her ties to her brother and to the stars had never felt stronger._

It all linked by what lie beyond the Earth and the blue skies above:

_Blood ties; a link to her brother who was travelling into the world where the Starman had come from. _

_Then she looked at her son who sat beside her on the sofa and saw the Starman reflected in his eyes._

The past and the present had never before seemed to so closely entwine as it did at that moment.

Then Scott smiled at her.

"Mom, calm down. We'll watch it together, we won't miss a second of it."

He caught a flicker of anxiety in his mother's eyes and then she looked back at the screen as the news report switched to images of the Solar Four and the planned mission.

"My Uncle Martin has flown four other space missions." He reminded her, "It's not as if it's his first. And Vern's with him this time."

The news report was still running through the specifics of the Solar Four craft.

She turned to her son and thought about her brother and the man who had become his closest friend.

"I can't believe Vern got a place on the mission!"

"He wouldn't have got there without my Uncle."

Jenny nodded; Scott was completely right about that –Vern knew her son well because he worked in the same field as Scott. The forty-five year old doctor of cosmology had wanted nothing else all his life but to get up there and see the stars, but he couldn't have got through the tough training program without Martin– and along the way the two of them had become close friends.

"I'm glad he got the place on the mission - but I'm sorry they turned you down." She told her son.

Scott shrugged it off.

"They said I didn't have enough experience in my field; I can accept that."

Jenny turned back to the screen.

"At least we can watch the launch together." She replied, and then she waited for the report to switch to Mission Control.

* * *

***Solar Four***

The craft had launched and torn up through the skies and beyond, now the force of the take off had slipped away and in the crew cabin, the occupants of Solar Four were strapped in their seats, coming to terms with the new world they had entered.

The Earth was far below looking like an orb filled with the swirls of blue and white and grey that had never looked so beautiful.

And out there, beyond, all was black and punctured by stars.

The crew sat in silence for a moment, just taking in the moment, knowing they were in a place where few had gone before.

Then a voice cut through the silence.

"Hey Vern," teased Nick Briggs, youngest crew member and son of the Commander who had put this mission together, "Congratulations –you got through launch without throwing up!"

And the co-pilot of the Solar Four, who had been a nervous wreck since the hours leading up to the launch, turned and ran a shaking hand through his short dark hair and fixed his dark eyes on Nick Briggs.

"Don't you _ever_ shut up?"

The young guy seated at the back of the crew cabin smirked.

"We've got six whole months together_...I wonder how long you will last._.."

"Briggs..."

On hearing the voice of Captain Martin Lee, Briggs shut his mouth.

Martin shifted back in his seat; he was a tall, muscular man with dark hair streaked with blonde lights that were a legacy to his time spent out in the sun enjoying sand and surf when he was home on Earth. His sky blue eyes carried no hint of anger but that could change in a second, switching him from a quietly spoken man into a raging tiger and Briggs knew that.

"_You're only here because your Daddy runs this mission from the ground." _Martin stated. "And _don't_ say another word to Doc Vernon. _Because if you do I will lose my temper with you and I'll give you the kind of slap your Father should have given you a long time ago, Nicholas. Have you got that?_"

Nick Briggs turned his head and looked out at the view of Earth's orbit and said no more.

Vern flashed Martin a smile, then turned to Briggs who was still looking away and flicked his middle finger at him quickly, before turning back to the controls in front of him before he got caught.

Martin laughed; _some things would never change - Vern and Nick would never get along..._

"Feel better for that, Vern?" He said in a low voice.

"_Definitely!"_ Vern replied.

And at the back of the cabin, the Russian Cosmonaut Maritsa Ivanov briefly smiled and shook her head.

"Bunch of kids!" She murmured, then she smiled affectionately at Vern, before looking down at her console and starting to explore the photography options she would have later on when they were moving out to pass the planets.

The man who sat beside her, a seasoned astronaut by the name of Joey Avison, a tall guy with wavy brown hair and sparkling brown eyes, adjusted the picture of his wife and three kids on the console in front of him and smiled.

"_Daddy's gonna be calling you from outer space tonight!"_ He said to the picture.

As Martin looked out at the view before his eyes, the vastness of space seemed so familiar it was almost as if it was welcoming him back.

He turned to Vern, who was also looking at the view, and noticed the scientist was tearful now.

Then Vern looked back at Martin and spoke with joy shining in his eyes.

_"I made it!"_ He said,_ "I'm here, I'm up in space with all the beauty and the strangeness of it all - this is all I've ever wanted to do, to see it for myself, just once..."_

"You'll have six months to get used to it." Martin reminded him.

And as he caught the look in Vern's eyes, he was sure he had never seen him look happier than he did at that moment.

"_This is it!"_ He said, _"I'm here...I made it...I'm on the mission!"_

"Unfortunately, for the_ rest _of us." Murmured Nick Briggs.

Martin shot him a warning glare.

"_That's enough!"_

Vern reached up to the array of controls above him and flicked some switches.

"Okay, we can start to move this baby out..."

Martin opened up the main control panel and keyed in the sequence to fire up the thrusters.

_And a light was blinking red._

"What's that?" He murmured as he tried the sequence again and nothing happened.

Vern tried some moves of his own, pulling the main circuits into alignment on a lit screen built into the console.

Then his eyes grew wide.

"Something's wrong here!"

"_What?"_ Said Briggs.

The slender blonde Russian woman looked up and stared towards the pilot's area.

Joey turned away from the picture of his kids with a worried look on his face.

Vern scanned the imagery of the electrical system.

"_No..."_ He said quietly.

Martin leaned over and looked at the screen.

"We've got some kind of a burn out?"

"I was afraid of this happening!" Vern said as his voice began to tremble, "This is new technology, _too _much of it in a new craft... I don't know where the burn out happened...we can't manoeuvre... _we can't do anything_..."

"We're stuck here?" Joey wondered.

Martin shook his head.

"No it means we could try and make a move to fly from orbit and anything could go wrong. It could be nothing or it could be something major. We could lose oxygen, power.._.anything.._."

"And only the tech support on the ground can figure it out." Vern stated, "_If_ we were on the ground...we can't fix this thing."

He was starting to sweat now.

"_We have to abort."_

"_Agreed."_

Martin opened up the channel to mission control, where he saw the bewildered face of Commander Briggs.

"Captain Lee?"

"We have to turn back. There's a burn out and we can't continue. We're turning around for separation from the craft and attempting re-entry. _This is a mayday_."

Then the screen fizzled out to static and Vern looked at Martin with fear in his eyes.

"_The com systems down?"_

Martin was busy keying in the separation sequence for the shuttle to separate from the Solar Four.

As they shifted free the lights flickered and Maritsa gave a gasp.

"What's happening?"

Joey leaned over and grasped her hand.

"It's okay." He said quietly, "Captain Lee can fly us home. He's flown a lot of missions- there's no bird he can't fly, right, Lee?"

Martin was still watching the controls as the shuttle separated.

"_Right..."_ He murmured.

His thoughts were on the fact that they might not make it back; he knew everything about flight but little about the electrical spec of this thing – that was Vern's area of expertise; he had worked along side other scientists who built this craft- that had been another reason why he'd been accepted on the mission...

_They were turned around now. _

Martin made a move to open up the boosters to fire them back through the atmosphere and the course was already plotted for mission control, Vern's hands had been shaking as he reprogrammed but it was done now and the only choice they had was to turn back.

"I've set us on all power to the main control and the life support." Vern said as he nervously ran his fingers through his hair, "We just have to hope we can still land this thing – it's a hybrid; the Solar Four's smart technology is twinned with the shuttle. _There's no way of knowing what the fault will do_."

Nick Briggs unbuckled his belt and got up.

"This is down to _you_, asshole!" He yelled at Vern, "You _never _should have come on this mission! You don't even know how to fix this glitch!"

"_It's not a glitch it's a major systems failure!"_ Vern shouted back, "No one could have seen this coming, not until it was too late! I had ground control check everything over and over and there was _no_ fault before we left. _It happened on launch! It would have slowly crept through the system and we wouldn't have known about it! It was too late to stop it!_"

And Nick Briggs, the smart mouthed bully of the team who thought he was better than anyone else because his father was Commander Briggs, took in a sharp breath and blinked back tears.

"_No way...no way am I going to die like this!"_

"SIT DOWN!" Martin yelled.

Briggs went back to his seat, his hands shaking as he fastened his belt together.

"It _will _be okay." Joey said quietly to Maritsa, then he let go of her hand and tightened his own safety belt as he fixed his gaze on the picture of his wife and kids once more.

Martin was ready to power up for re-entry.

He glanced at his terrified co-pilot.

"_Trust me, Vern. We'll make it."_

Vern looked into his eyes.

"_You know I trust you."_

Then he turned back to the console, throwing switches and pushing buttons.

There was a jolt as the boosters fired up.

"She's all yours." He said as he glanced at Martin, "Just get us home in one piece..."

"Don't worry about that, Vern – we're going home." He stated, and the craft headed closer to Earth, the crew inside cushioned by the hi tech life support and the heat shields and everything else they had come to have faith in.

* * *

As the craft hit the earth's atmosphere it hit it hard, jarring the cabin and shaking the bones of the people inside it. The cabin continued to shake as the engines roared and they burned through the atmosphere.

Joey was clinging to his seat as he kept this eyes fixed on the picture of his family.

Maritsa was being shaken about like a rag doll as the craft was buffeted by the sharp re- entry.

Then cloud swirling white gave way to blue and the craft continued to shake and rattle their bones as the craft plunged down closer to land.

"_We're on target!_" Martin yelled over the noise of the rattling cabin, _"I can make the runway!"_

He glanced at Vern, who was clutching his seat so hard his knuckles had turned white as the cabin jolted.

His face was pale and his eyes were fixed on the land that was rushing ever closer.

_"Don't let me die!"_ He gasped as the cabin shook again and metal groaned and then he screwed his eyes tight shut as tears ran down his face.

Sobbing was now coming from the back of the cabin; the son of Commander Briggs was crying like a little frightened kid.

Martin pulled down the gears to lower the landing wheels.

The lights flashed as the alarm sounded, warning of a malfunction.

Vern stared at the console, knowing in a heartbeat what that meant.

He drew in a frightened breath as the landing strip rushed closer.

There was heat spreading through the cabin too.

Martin turned around to see flames escaping from the console where Joey sat, the flames were licking out of the electrical systems and curling the paper as the picture of his children stared to burn.

Maritsa gave a sob and looked at Vern and her lips formed words that could not be heard over the shaking of the cabin:

"_I love you..."_

Vern reached back, grasping at her hand.

He was still weeping as he held on tightly; they had shared such little time and now they had no time at all.

"_I love you too." _He promised her as the craft shook harder and creaked and groaned.

Then it hit the ground as metal squealed and started to tear, jarring the people inside it as it skidded out of control at speed down the runway, leaving a shower of sparks in its wake.

The force of impact ripped the cabin in two, and as it ripped, Vern's hand was torn from Maritsa' grasp.

The front of the cabin spun violently daylight came rushing into the cabin as it began to break in half, as it spun back it slammed against the back of the cabin that hit the front section like a freight train, smashing into the co-pilot's side and sending the battered front of the cabin into a roll.

Then the back half of the craft rushed past it, metal screaming and sparks flying as jet fuel leaked out and fuel met sparks and the back half of the cabin, now half a mile up the runway, exploded, sending a rush of heat and debris scattered far and wide, rushing over the battered front of the of the crew cabin that was now at the side of the runway, half crushed while up ahead, the remainder of the cabin was lost in the heart of a fireball.

* * *

_Martin was still strapped in his seat. _

The torn cabin was on its side and all he could hear was the wail of paramedic sirens and fire trucks.

He turned to the co-pilot's seat.

"_Vern?"_ He said breathlessly.

Every bone in his body ached as if he had been slammed into a brick wall but he carefully reached out, placing his hand on his best friend's shoulder.

Vern's eyes were closed and blood was running from the upper part of his seat.

He was breathing shallow, weak breaths and as Martin grabbed at his hand he gave no response.

"_Vern!"_ He said again, but at that moment Vern's head turned as he breathed harder and Martin saw where the blood was coming from: _the right side of Vern's skull had been shattered by the impact of the crash, and blood and bone and brain tissue were leaking through the open wound. _

But Vern was still alive and Martin clung to that thought as he kept a grip on his hand as the sirens grew closer, then he closed his eyes as every bone in his body screamed in pain.

_Then the world turned black and he knew nothing._

* * *

***Jenny***

She sat staring at the screen as the horror unfolded of the crashed Solar Four and the burning wreckage scattered across the runway at mission control.

"_What went wrong?"_ She said in a shocked voice, "Why, _how _could this happen..."

The she got up and grabbed the phone, calling mission control.

The number was busy and she slammed the phone down again and gave a sob.

"_They're all dead, Scott!"_

Her son got up and placed his hands on his mother's shoulders.

"We don't know that for sure. We have to wait..."

Jenny sat beside her son, not giving up as she repeatedly called the number but found it busy every time.

Then at last a news report began:

_"We can confirm that mission control received a mayday from the crew of the Solar Four shortly before the craft attempted re-entry,"_ The reporter said, "_And three of the five crew members were killed on impact. It's also been confirmed that the remaining crew members survived because the cabin sheared in half before the explosion. Officials have also confirmed that the pilot Captain Martin Lee and his co-pilot Dr Sebastian Vernon are being taken to hospital."_

Jenny gave a sigh of relief as she hugged her son.

"Oh thank God, they're both okay!"

Then the reporter spoke again.

_"It has been confirmed at this stage that Captain Lee's condition is stable and that he appeared to have received relatively minor injuries. But his co-pilot Dr Vernon was moved from the scene of the crash only moments ago and it has been said that his condition is life threatening..."_

Tears filled Jenny's eyes all over again.

"_Vern's critical?"_

Scott held his mother tightly in his arms as he comforted her.

_"But he made it."_ He reminded her_," My Uncle Martin made it, he's alive..."_

* * *

***Three Years Later***

_In Martin's mind, there was always a moment when he was back onboard the Solar Four._

In the time that had passed since the crash he had thought about everything that happened leading up to the disaster and every time found nothing that he could have changed that would have made a difference.

But Captain Martin Lee would never be more haunted by those events than the words he had said to his co-pilot and best friend when they'd decided to abort the mission:

"_Trust me, Vern. We'll make it..."_

The memory felt as sharp as the jolt that had woken him when the phone had rung, cutting through the silence of the early morning and pulling him out of sleep.

_It had been Jenny_.

His sister had spoken quietly as she broke the news:

"_Martin? It's Jenny. I just heard from the hospital – Vern doesn't have long to live. You should get here as soon as you can..."_

And now as he stood on her doorstep and rang the bell and waited, he felt a washed out with sadness just as the world around him was drenched in falling rain.

This was a change of scene for Martin; not only a trip back into a time and place that haunted him, but it was a step back to the days when he often used to stay with Jenny and her son while he had been an astronaut. The training base was not far from her where she lived and the space center even closer. These days Martin still flew planes but not the kind capable of spaceflight; these days he taught young pilots how to fly jet fighters...

Jenny opened the door.

She looked up at her tall, muscular brother who had changed little since the day of the Solar Four disaster –except that he had never lost the haunted look from his eyes. The rain had dampened his hair and fallen on the jacket of his dark blue suit. His shirt was slightly creased and his tie was loosened and she guessed he had slept on the flight on the way over here. And that haunted look in his blue eyes had never seemed deeper than it did right now.

_"Vern's dying?"_ He said as the rain continued to fall.

Jenny nodded and then she put her arms around him and the two of them embraced on the doorstep.

* * *

Moments later Martin had stepped inside and left his bags in the hallway.

Jenny was making some coffee and he had followed her into the kitchen.

As he looked around he felt a sense of belonging in this house; it was one of those places that never changed. She'd had the same kitchen for more than twenty years and the wallpaper in this place hadn't been altered for maybe longer. This was home as far as he was concerned; it _always_ felt like coming home when he came to see Jenny.

"Where's Scott?"

Jenny was still making the coffee.

"At work."

"Have you been to seen Vern yet?"

She turned away from the coffee and looked into her brother's eyes.

"Me and Scott went yesterday."

Then Jenny blinked away tears.

"It's a horrible, selfish thing to say and I'd give anything to have Vern back with us - but when I saw him lying there, I got the same thought I always get every time I visit him..."

She took in a sharp breath and blinked again, determined not to cry because she could only guess at how her brother was feeling right now; _Vern was his best friend..._

"I'm sorry, Martin." She said quietly, "But Scott applied for the mission too. Him and Vern were both going after the same place on that mission. And when I see Vern laying there in a coma I keep thinking not only that it's terrible for him to be suffering like this, but I think of my son and I thank God he was turned down_. I'm so relieved he didn't get the place on the mission, I glad this happened to someone else, even someone we know –_"

And as her voice choked up with tears Martin put his arms around her again.

_"I shouldn't be saying things like that."_ Jenny's voice was still tearful.

"No," Martin said softly to his sister, "It makes perfect sense. Of course you think that way – you're thinking of your _son_. Scott didn't get the place. _He didn't go._ He _wasn't _caught up the disaster. _Never feel guilty for being thankful of that_."

And he gently stroked her hair and kissed her cheek as he let go of her again.

Jenny still looked tearful.

Martin thought about Jenny's son, his nephew Scott who had been born as something of a miracle because until her pregnancy happened, Jenny had been told she was infertile. Scott was her only child, not only that but he had heard rumors about the Starman, rumors that he had had heard because of his close links to NASA. Jenny had kept that episode in her life a closed subject and Martin had never pushed the issue, and he wasn't about to change that now.

"I _know_ he's precious to you. Of course he is, he's your only child. If I had a son I'd be glad he didn't make that mission, too."

Jenny glanced at the coffee.

"Shall we have this coffee first or just get in the car and go and see Vern?"

_"We should see Vern right now."_ Martin said quietly, knowing his thoughts could shift no where else until he had been at his best friend's bedside for what could be the last time.

* * *

Martin stayed silent in the car while Jenny drove them seven miles out of town to the military hospital where Vern had been a patient for the whole of the three years since the crash.

When they got out of the car and walked towards the entrance, Martin's mind was on the past once more; a past where he remembered the man as he used to be – lively, funny, some times drunk too - but Vern had been full of passion for life.

Then Martin remembered the enquiry that had been hurriedly pushed through to look into the disaster:

When the autopsy reports had been read out on Ivanov, Briggs and Avison, it had concluded that the three of them, being in the back section of the cabin that had sheared off, had been killed instantly by the jet fuel exploding. And right after the details of the deaths had been discussed, Vern's medical report had been read out:

_He'd broken his back in three places. He had massive head injuries caused by the impact of the crash at the moment the cabin broke in half, injuries from which he would never recover. He was in a permanent coma and would never wake up again..._

And right after those details had been read out, the electrical fault had been discussed:

A slow-burning wire that had crept along like a lit fuse, ignited at launch by loosened insulation, had caused the heat of the launch to spark the wiring.

_That burn had crept into the main system._

The conclusion was reached that the disaster could not have been averted.

In order to avoid the disaster, they would have needed to be aware of the burn out ten minutes before they had actually found it.

The scientists and other experts had put together the same scenario with a different out come in retrospect, concluding that _if_ the burn out been found ten minutes before, steps could have been taken to change the outcome:

_Instant separation from the main craft._

_Divert all power to life support and basic function._

_Jettison seventy percent of the fuel to keep the barest minimum to get back to earth and cancel out a chance of combusion on landing._

If they'd known ten minutes before the warning light turned on, if they'd known to take those steps, they would have survived.

_But no one had known because the light did not come on until it was too late_...

Martin had spent many hours late at night lying alone in bed with his eyes closed picturing a different outcome, taking in every recommendation from the enquiry- separating the craft, diverting power to cut off from the electrical burnout... but all the retrospect in the world didn't change the outcome:

_It had happened and no one could have prevented it._

Martin followed his sister into Vern's room.

She glanced at him and then walked over to the window while Martin sat down at his bedside.

Vern was lying on his back on a bed with sheets as pale as the walls and he almost looked as if he was sleeping, if not for the fact that he was so weak.

Sometimes when he spoke to him Martin wondered if he would hear what he was saying because Vern often moved or he caught the faintest flicker of expression on his face, but then the moment was gone.

He took hold of his hand as he started to speak.

"I got here as soon as I could." He said quietly, "I heard you're not doing so good right now. But you're still a hero, Vern. The electrical side of that craft was your area of expertise and you did all you could to switch the power down. They should have lived. We both know that. But there was _nothing_ you or I could have done to change the outcome."

_Vern remained motionless._

Martin felt tears stinging his eyes as he recalled the man he used to know _– seeing him like this only reminded him that Vern as he remembered him was already gone, that man had died on the day of the Solar Four disaster..._

He ran his hand gently over his hair and then he leaned closer and kissed his cheek.

"I'm here for you." He said, "I'm going to stick around and see you every single day, Vern. I think you _can_ pull through. I can't believe anything else because I remember a time when you almost quit the training program because you thought you couldn't cope with it, but in the end you stayed, you stayed because you're strong and you _have_ to find that strength now. "

Vern's eyes were closed and his hand stayed motionless in his grip.

He had scars that ran up the right side of his face and into his hairline; they were faded now but served as a reminder of the terrible injuries he had sustained in the crash.

Martin didn't want to think about what the doctors had said; right since the crash they had warned that the brain damage meant he would never wake up – and even if he did beat the odds and wake up, he was so badly injured he would never recover. Now they were saying he was getting weaker and there was a possibility that he could die.

Martin couldn't deny they had done all they could to keep him alive over the last three years, but now he felt angry to think they were giving up on him.

"I'll _never_ give up on you." He whispered.

And Vern remained unresponsive as he kissed him again and said goodbye.

* * *

Evening shadows were falling by the time they arrived back home.

Jenny parked the car and got out and Martin followed.

She asked him again if he wanted a coffee and he shook his head, going into the house and taking a bottle of scotch from the drinks cabinet in the front room.

He poured himself a double measure and picked up the glass.

"I think I'll go and sit outside for a while."

Jenny watched as her brother left the bottle on the table, then changed his mind and turned back and picked it up.

"Martin," She said, "Did you want some company?"

"_No."_

Jenny understood: she was sure seeing Vern today had brought the Solar Four disaster back as vivid as yesterday and Martin needed some time alone right now.

"Scott won't be back from work until late." She reminded him.

"I'll see him the morning." Martin replied quietly, then he went out the back door and sat at a bench in the garden where he watched the sun sinking low over a day that had stared with rain but turned warmer and brighter , but now the light was dying, making the open woodland at the bottom of the long garden seem cast in shade.

_The first drink went down too fast and he poured another._

As he swirled the liquid around in the glass he recalled the days before the crash, back in a time when they barely knew each other when they had first been brought together to train for the mission:

_Vern grabbed the glass off the table and quickly downed the champagne._

"_What the hell!"_ He'd exclaimed, _"I'm here, I'm on the team...I want to celebrate!"_

And Martin smiled and shook his head, remembering the next morning:

Vern had come stumbling out of his room, still in the clothes he'd worn the night before, wearing shades to block out the glare of the daylight as he put a hand to his pounding head.

"Get yourself together- we've got training to start." Martin had reminded him.

"_Seriously?"_ Vern wondered as he nursed his hangover, _"They expect us to start training today? I can't do this right now...I think I'll go back to bed for a couple of hours..."_

Martin had pulled him back as he made a move to turn away.

"_If you don't show for training,"_ He'd warned him, _"They'll throw you off the program..."_

As the memory burned brightly, Martin raised his glass to Vern and drank another shot.

He stayed in the garden until dusk fell to night and by that time the stars were out and every time looked up at them he thought of the crew of the Solar Four.

The bottle was empty now and he swayed on his feet as he got up, knocking the glass as it rolled, then it hit the stone patio with a sharp crack.

"_Oh shit!"_ He murmured, leaning down to pick up the glass.

He was sure as it wasn't shattered all over the patio that he could pick it up safely enough.

But as a shard of glass caught his hand, he guessed he had been wrong about that.

He threw the glass in the trash can, then went back to the table to pick up the bottle.

He paused to check his hand and saw nothing but a small scratch.

As he raised the bottle to drain the last drop a tiny spot of blood welled up from the cut and hit the wooden bench.

But Martin had turned away now, his thoughts with Vern and the rest of the crew of the failed mission.

He put the bottle in the trash and went back inside the house because his head was spinning and he wanted to do nothing else but sleep and hope that sleep brought with it no nightmares of a disaster he had no power to change.

* * *

Then light that flared and faded out from the open woods at the bottom of the garden.

_Now and the garden was dark and still - but far from empty._

She stepped out from the shade of the trees, her skin was shiny with sweat from the heat of her journey and her steps slow and stiff in her high heeled shoes as she crossed the lawn in a short, clinging dress.

Her dark hair framed her face and her eyes were ice blue.

She looked at the house:

_This was the one, the home of Jenny Hayden._

_The place where her ancestor had once come to visit._

Jenny Hayden's man from the stars was a man from the past now – she came from the same world but many hundred of years in the future, in a world where much of the Starman's teachings had been lost over time and through the war that had seen his people evolve into synthetic cyborgs. The emotion and understanding of humanity had been forgotten and the purpose of this mission was to research and record such information all over again...

_She reached the bench and sensed Martin Lee was close by._

She held out her index finger as a tiny silver disc emerged and began to revolve.

She touched the disc to the drop of blood and then reached up to one of the many swirling tattoos that adorned her arms and placed the disk over the smallest one on her upper arm, and it shifted like the smart technology that it was and absorbed it.

_The disk processed._

And the alien visitor paused, wondering why _Eve_ skin would not be suitable for introduction to a human male.

But the processes worked automatically and the woman's form shifted, shedding the spare persona in a split second.

And then _he_ stood there, dressed in black jeans and heavy boots and wearing a white shirt with short sleeves that allowed his muscular arms to carry the smart tattoos and their technology without the hindrance of being covered.

He ran his fingers through black hair that seemed as dark as his eyes and he looked up at the house:

_There was no need for the Eve skin. _

The program had switched him back to _Adam_, and he knew his contact was on the upper floor of the house, in a bedroom on the left and the light had just gone out.

The visitor now named Adam stepped back into the shade of the trees and decided to wait for daybreak; there was more than a trace of a drug in Martin's blood that was known on this planet as _alcohol - _and he needed him to be free of that before he could speak with him and explain the purpose of his mission.

_Adam silently waited in shadow, waiting for the dawn when he would make first contact with Captain Martin Lee..._


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Martin had woken up feeling hungover as he heard the sound of a car leaving outside.

He guessed Scott had just left for work and then he had checked the time and given a sigh as he silently reminded himself that sleeping in late was _never_ a part of his schedule even when he wasn't on duty. He didn't _do_ lazy, not as a rule and he knew for sure that crawling into a bottle wouldn't make a difference to the fact that his best friend was dying:

_Drinking had been Vern's way of taking the pressure off._

_But drinking wouldn't bring him any closer, even if it brought the memories into sharper focus._

Martin had showered and got dressed and went downstairs.

Then he walked through the kitchen and out into the laundry room where Jenny was loading the drier.

She looked at him and there was no trace of a hint that she wanted to lecture him for drinking a whole bottle of scotch.

"Feel better this morning?"

"I broke a glass last night. Sorry about that."

"Want some breakfast?"

Martin shook his head.

Jenny was still loading the drier with her son's laundry.

"You'll miss doing that when he leaves home." He remarked, "He'll move out eventually, all kids do it some day."

Jenny closed the drier and frowned as she studied the look on his face.

"I know that. What's the matter, Martin?"

He shrugged, guessing the booze had left him on a downer.

"I'm just saying..."

He avoided her gaze as he suddenly knew for sure this _was_ the hangover talking; he wasn't thinking about Scott moving out eventually, he was thinking about other degrees of loneliness and it had nothing at all to do with family – _but everything to do with the people had lost on the Solar Four mission_...

"I'm just saying eventually we all have to leave people and things behind, people get separated, it's just life. _But it doesn't make it fair_."

Jenny heard the pain in her brother's voice and as he glanced at her she knew that look too well.

"I know how hard this is on you. Vern was your closest friend on that mission-"

"_I don't want to talk about this right now, Sis."_

He turned and headed back through to the kitchen not sure if it was the booze making him feel lousy or the thoughts that were crowding his mind, but suddenly all he wanted was to be outside again, taking in fresh air.

Jenny shut the door of the drier and started it up, then she gave a tired sigh.

"_Don't shut me out, Martin." _She murmured, feeling as helpless to change the situation as she had on the day the mission had ended in disaster.

* * *

Martin closed the back door behind him and walked across the patio. He thought about the scotch and last night and guessed it would be easy to sit down and open another bottle and do it all over again – but he knew it wouldn't solve anything.

Drinking only took care of the situation for the time it lasted and helped him to forget; at least that was what he told himself when ever he resorted to it, but drinking didn't help, -not when the booze took hold and he found himself lost in the past again...

Martin sat down at the bench and looked down the length of the sunlit garden; everything seemed so bright in the morning sunshine.

Sometimes days like this when the world seemed so clear and defined and beautiful it almost made him feel as if he were going insane:

_The world kept on turning._

_Yet everything around him seemed so perfect, oblivious to its loss._

_The crew of the Solar Four were dead._

There were three names on the monument at Mission Control – Maritsa Ivanov, Joey Avison and Nick Briggs. There was a blank space beneath those names and although it was simply the way the names had been set out, that space beneath the names had always haunted him because he had known since the crash that some day Vern's name would be on that list too.

His eyes reflected the skies above as he looked towards the sunlit blue and thought about the blackness of space that lie beyond it:

_Sometimes he dreamed about being back there._

_Sometimes he dreamed of trying to change the outcome of the crash._

_The outcome never changed; it always ended with the cabin spitting and the back sheering off and exploding in a ball of flame._

As Martin sat alone in the garden he became aware of the stillness of the moment; he could hear the birds in the trees and feel the breeze blowing through his hair but this wasn't living, this was just existing...

He was sure the alcohol had pulled him down into dark thoughts because he was doing it again, he was thinking about the dead and how he wondered if they still existed on another plane, if their ghosts were still around.

_If their ghosts could come through, what would they say?_

_That he didn't try hard enough to land that thing?_

_That he had no right to be alive when they were gone?_

After the disaster the press had called him a hero for getting the Solar Four back to Earth.

_But he hadn't felt like a hero when he stood over the graves of his dead colleagues_.

It didn't matter how often he heard that he couldn't have changed the outcome, he still felt the same sadness and regret that he felt every time he visited Vern's bedside:

_It was all down to the fact that there had not been enough time._

And knowing he could never alter that was the hardest thing he had ever had to accept.

Martin was lost in his thoughts now, so deep into them that he didn't see the shadow that fell behind him.

His gaze was still fixed on the blue sky above as he thought about how he had never set out to be called a hero – he had only ever wanted to do his job and do it well and his best had not been enough...

_Then a heavy hand hit his shoulder and made him catch his breath_.

"Captain Martin Lee?"

Martin blinked as his head span for a moment. He blamed the booze; he was still hungover and had turned around so sharply the garden had spun violently for a brief moment.

He looked up at the man who stood over him.

"Who wants to know?"

The stranger studied his face and then spoke again.

"You _are_ Martin Lee?"

Martin stood up, wondering how this guy had walked into his sister's garden – _had he come through the open woods at the back of the house? And how did he know his name?_

"Yeah, I'm Martin Lee. Who the hell are you?"

As he spoke he stared at the stranger:

The man was tall and muscular and his arms were etched with swirling tattoos with such intricate detail they were unlike any other he had seen before. The man had dark eyes and dark hair and his face was strong in a masculine way yet there was something about him that seemed to hint at gentleness. If he was honest with himself he knew he had to admit he found this total stranger attractive – although the darkness of his eyes seemed almost unnatural and as he spoke again, all thoughts of being fascinated by his appearance vanished in a heartbeat.

"_Why do regret the past?"_ He wondered_, "You are not responsible."_

Martin's eyes widened as shock and anger sparked up inside him.

"What did you say?" His voice was hushed as he stared at the stranger, but the man gave no reaction to his hostility.

"You were thinking about the mission. You think about it often. I see no reason; there was a technical fault. Nothing that could be altered at the time- as you would say, _an accident_."

Martin drew in a slow breath as he glared at the stranger and kept his voice low.

He didn't want to start a fight or do anything to alarm his sister, but this weirdo had wandered onto the property talking as if he could read his mind and everything he had just said had been true, that was the part that scared him the most...

_He couldn't have known._

_He couldn't have read his mind..._

"Get out of here before I throw you off this property!"

Martin had locked him in a hard stare as he screwed his hand into a fist.

The man stood his ground, speaking calmly, unaffected by his words.

"I was sent to find you. _When the Solar Four crew compartment detached from the main vessel it was left in orbit. The point of combustion began in the main vessel and continued after you returned to Earth._"

Martin felt his blood turn to ice as he stared at the stranger, wondering how he had access to this information...

"The official story went that the Solar Four fell out of orbit pulled down by gravity and burned up in the atmosphere. But the theory was incorrect; as your scientists know, the smart technology was twinned with the crew compartment. _When the crash happened the main vessel exploded in space_. The technology was almost organic. It was a primitive ancestor to true cyborg technology, the kind which made my people into synthetic cyborgs like me. _It happened after the war on my planet._ I come from the same world as Scott Hayden's father. He was a great man who taught us about humanity. But that was many hundreds of years ago. There was a war and most of the old ways were lost. That is why I was sent back, brother of Jenny Hayden. _I only have ten days. You must teach me all you know_."

Martin was still staring at the stranger.

He took a step back and stumbled against the bench as he sat down hard, staring up at the man who claimed to be an alien visitor.

_He thought about Jenny._

_He thought about his nephew's father._

Then he looked into the dark eyes of the stranger.

"_No..."_ He whispered, _"This can't be happening..."_

"I can show you proof." The man stated, and he turned his hand over, stepping closer as a small metal disk began to rise out of his index finger.

He raised his hand and ran it over the tattoos that covered his upper arm.

As he touched them, the inked pictures began to move and shift.

Martin stared hard at what he was witnessing as the swirled patterns took on shapes that he vaguely recognised...

"_That's a star map?"_

"A map that tracks the route from my world to yours."

He touched a larger, spinning globe and it opened up like a steel flower blooming from his flesh. Inside were three compartments and each contained a tiny glowing sphere.

"These energy cells are my transport. I have three. One is to send back information to my people. Another is to send me back to my world many years into what you would call the future. The other is an emergency cell in case of need for a sudden departure, in event of the threat of danger."

Martin was staring at him, as he stared at him he thought about every rumor he had ever heard about Jenny and the Starman so long ago.

Then the man reached into the open metal and took out one of the small glowing spheres.

It moved as if alive as he held it and then he let it go, watching it float in the air like a firefly.

As he reached up and caught it, Jenny opened the back door and stared at the stranger.

Then she saw the glowing sphere and watched him take hold of it again and put it back into the metal that closed up as ink moved beneath his skin.

Jenny gave a gasp of alarm as she stared at the man:

_There was another one?_

_Another visitor here on Earth, another like her Starman?_

* * *

Martin felt shocked as he sat on the couch in his sister's front room and stared at the stranger.

Jenny had almost passed out when she first laid eyes on him, but she had quickly come around to understanding the fact that he was an alien visitor.

This had stunned Martin because he had always remained silent about all he had heard about Jenny and the Starman so long ago.

She had walked up to the man and told him to come inside as she stared at him with eyes wide with surprise.

As they had gone into the house, Martin had glanced at his sister.

"_So the rumors were true about Scott's father?"_ He had said quietly.

Jenny had nodded but said nothing as she led the visitor through the front room.

_Now she sat on the couch looking at him intently_.

Martin was sitting on the other couch and looking at him, then looking at his sister as it began to sink in:

_Yes, his nephew's father really had come from another planet..._

"I have so much to ask you." Jenny said in a hushed voice, "You come from the same planet as my son's father?"

The man looked into her eyes and sensed that Jenny Hayden had many questions.

"Yes but hundreds of years in the future. I come from a time when his world was destroyed by war. Our people used technology to survive and become synthetic cyborgs- we are organic but mostly artificially constructed. Flesh and bone with built in technical equipment that can be hidden by organic means."

"Like your tattoos?"

"Exactly." He replied, "And I was sent here to retrieve information about humanity – to find the astronaut Martin Lee, half brother of Jenny Hayden."

"_Why me?"_

As Martin spoke he wished he had left the booze alone because right now he was sure he had never needed a stiff drink more than he did at this moment.

"Because you are Jenny's brother. Because you are also an astronaut - the closest we can find in your world at this time to a man who understands what lies beyond the Earth. _I only have ten days and I must take information back to my own world._"

Jenny recalled how her man from the stars had struggled to survive on Earth.

"You can't live here beyond that time? You can't survive?"

The man fell silent for a moment as he looked out of the open window and his dark eyes fixed on the flawless blue sky.

"_I have ten days."_ He repeated, and then he fell silent.

Martin got up.

"I need some water." He said quietly as the shock of all that had unfolded hit him at the same time as the worst of his hangover.

As he walked out of the room, the man looked at Jenny.

"Your brother is afraid of me?"

"Very startled." Jenny replied, feeling a sense of dejavu as she explained human reactions to an alien visitor all over again, "He wasn't expecting this. It's a lot for him to come to terms with."

He thought for a moment, drawing on what basic knowledge had been preserved on his home planet about the human race.

"Your brother has children?"

"No." Jenny replied.

"He has wife? Human males mate with females and humans often choose to emphasise their bond with their choice of partner through marriage."

Jenny smiled and shook her head.

"No, not all humans marry. Martin wouldn't want a wife. _My brother is gay._"

The man's dark eyes clouded with confusion.

"Gay?"

"That's right."

"_You are mistaken."_ He stated.

Jenny smiled again.

"You're surprised? Why? He's a big tough guy who's been to outer space and now he teaches trainee pilots how to fly jet fighters. And he _also_ happens to be gay. Don't tell me your world think people should fall into stereotypes..."

The man still looked confused.

"He is _not_ gay." He repeated, "Gay, in your language, defines as happy, joyful - he is _not_ happy. He is distressed by memories of the failed space mission."

Jenny finally understood.

"No, gay has another meaning too – it means when a person chooses a partner of their own gender. Can you understand that?"

He thought about it, then he wondered what his _own_ preference was - on his home planet, these things were not discussed because a relationship without an active purpose of reproduction was thought to be pointless.

"_Your people are complicated."_ He stated.

Then Martin came back into the room. He looked at the visitor and then sat down heavily in his seat once more.

"So who are you?" He wondered, "Do you have a name? You know mine; I may as well know yours."

The man fixed his dark eyes on him and spoke softly.

"You would not be able to pronounce my name as it is spoken on my home planet. But for the purpose of this journey I am known as Adam - in reference to your first male in the ancient biblical text."

"Adam." Martin repeated, "Okay, I can handle that. Just tell me what you want to know, because this has happened at a very bad time for me, it feels like too much right now."

Adam looked at him and Martin got that strange feeling again, the one he had got when they first met, as if the guy was reading his mind.

"Why do humans grieve?" He wondered, _"When life ceases to function its importance is therefore gone. Your friend was badly damaged by the crash of the spaceflight. It is better if he dies - he can't live and function in his current state. It seems pointless to have artificially prolonged his life for so long."_

Hurt and anger fired up in Martin's eyes as tears stung at his vision.

He was about to get up from the sofa and punch Adam, not caring who he was or where he came from because _no one _talked about his best friend like that – then Jenny looked at him in alarm.

"_No, Martin!" _She said sharply, _"He doesn't understand! He's not being cruel; he just doesn't know anything about our world!"_

Martin sat back and took in a deep breath, and then he fixed Adam with an icy glare.

"_Never_ say harsh things about my best friend – or _anyone_ I care about! Vern was my closest friend. It rips me apart to know he's dying. And he _does_ matter. _He'll matter as long as I live because the people we love stay in our hearts and minds and we don't let them go, we don't forget them – they always matter!_"

Adam looked at him thoughtfully, wondering why the human male named Martin Lee had become so irate.

"The custom is to apologize." He stated, "I had no understanding of this matter. But I _have _recorded it and I am processing it."

Martin took another deep breath as he let that last remark pass him by; this was a difficult time in his life and the thought that Adam wanted to record everything made him angry, resentful- he didn't even want to talk about how he felt to his own sister right now...

But he looked back at Adam and spoke carefully, remembering this man did not intend to say or do anything to anger him or cause hurt:

_He simply did not understand yet, he had much to learn..._

"I'll do all I can to help you." He promised him.

And the two men looked at each other and Jenny breathed a sigh of relief; finally the two of them were reaching a level of understanding.

She got up from her seat and looked at Adam.

"Do you eat and sleep like us?" She wondered.

"We have evolved into synthetic beings that are in ways and appearances vastly humanoid." He stated.

Jenny smiled.

"That sounds like a _yes_...you can stay here with us. I know my son would be thrilled to meet you. His phone won't be on until the afternoon because he's tied up in lectures all morning but I will be calling him to tell him all about you later on."

He looked at her with a puzzled expression.

"Your son is tied up?"

Jenny laughed softly.

"_Busy._ I mean he's busy with work."

And then she glanced at her brother and the alien visitor called Adam, feeling sure they were forming an understanding now.

"I'm going to leave you both to talk." She said, "I can tell you and my brother have a lot to discuss."

* * *

As Jenny walked out of the room Martin got up from his seat.

"I don't know how I can teach you about my world in ten days." He stated, "I don't know where to begin."

And he opened the patio doors and stepped out onto the lawn, taking in the fresh air as his eyes turned skywards again.

"I know a lot about life and how good it can be and how bad it can turn and I know about joy and sadness and every other emotion in between – but I _still_ don't know what to say to you."

Adam stepped closer.

As he looked into his eyes Martin was suddenly aware of how close they had become.

But Adam was looking at him intently, as if making a silent decision.

_"Tell me what to do."_ Martin said to him, _"I don't know how to teach you anything."_

Adam reached up and suddenly his hands were softly brushing against his face as his fingers slid into his hair.

Martin caught his breath at the suddenness of his touch, closing his eyes as the moment took him over.

Then he felt Adam so close to him his breath was on his face.

"_I can learn from your memories."_ He stated.

Martin opened his eyes.

"My memories?"

Adam placed a hand on his shoulder and the other slid away from his hair. He watched as the disk emerged from his fingertip, then Adam placed it against his temple as he looked deeply into his eyes.

"_Tell me about the Solar Four space mission."_ He stated.

And his fingertip pressed harder and something cold and sharp reached into his mind, sending pain shooting through Martin's thoughts.

He gave a yell and stumbled backwards, putting his hand to his head as the ache in his temple began to slowly fade.

"What did you just do to me?" He demanded.

"I made a copy of your memories, starting from the day you began training for the mission." He replied, taking a seat on the patio and watching as the disk continued to spin on his index finger, "And now I will start to process it."

And he touched the disk to the swirled pattern on his upper arm.

The small ornate globe began to turn and lights briefly flickered beneath the ink and then the pattern swirled again and Adam fell silent, sitting like a statue and looking for all the world as if he might be staring off into the place where land met sky on the horizon as he began to read the memories of the Solar Four mission.

Martin's head ached again and he wasn't sure if it was because of what Adam had just done or if it was his hangover lingering, but he turned and went back into the house, knowing nothing for sure but the fact that he needed to lie down because right now he felt exhausted.

* * *

Now alone in the garden Adam was aware the brother of Jenny Hayden needed to sleep. He was also aware that Jenny was excited at the prospect of her son Scott meeting a man from the same world as his own father.

But he pushed that aside as he closed his eyes and saw into an inner world where the copy of Martin's memories began to play out:

_The sky was blue and the sun was shining on a day much like today, but this had been three years ago in a different time and place:_

Martin was at the training centre walking alongside Commander Briggs as they headed towards the living quarters where Martin would be staying for a large part of the duration of his training.

"Who else is on the team, Sir?" He wondered as he looked at the older, greying man who was in charge of running the mission.

"Joey Avison, the guy who's flown two Mars missions, the Russian cosmonaut Maritsa Ivanov - and my son Nick will be also be coming along, I was very proud when he got accepted for the mission."

Martin glanced at the Commander.

"I'm not surprised your _son_ made the mission."

The Commander's expression grew frosty as he spoke again.

"He worked _very _hard to get there." He added quickly, "And you've got a civilian coming along too – Dr Sebastian Vernon, the NASA cosmologist."

"So I heard." Martin replied, explaining as he saw the surprised look on the Commander's face:

"He used to work with my nephew. My sister told me he was glad to get on the team, but I've never met him personally."

"Well you'll get to know him soon enough, you're sharing living quarters with him. I needed to put him with someone who can keep an eye on him – he nearly didn't make the team and I'm still not certain he'll get through the training."

Martin smiled on hearing that remark as he wondered exactly what this doctor of cosmology would be like...

"I don't mind being stuck with the geek, Sir."

"I wouldn't call him a geek!" The commander said in surprise, "Actually he's a bit of a live wire. He's had certain _issues_ that have blemished his career too. That's why I'm hoping you'll be a good influence on him."

"I'm sure I will, Sir." Martin replied, knowing it was never a good thing to piss off the boss on the first day, so he was going to keep his mouth shut about objecting to being given the task of babysitting the only civilian on the mission...

Then there was a crunch of metal as two cars collided and they both turned back towards the parking area:

A white convertible had parked in a space near the offices and a smaller red sports car had slammed into it on an angle, denting the convertibles bumper and smashing a headlight on the sports car.

"_Oh no!"_ The Commander exclaimed, and as he hurried off towards the scene of the minor collision, Martin watched the scene unfold as the drivers got out of their cars and began a heated conversation that quickly spiralled into an argument, then he wandered closer out of curiosity.

The driver of the red sports car was no older than twenty five. He was in military uniform and clearly forgetting his respectable officer rank as he fixed the other man with a furious glare.

"I did _not_ hit your car on purpose!" He yelled, "What are you doing in my parking spot anyway?"

The driver of the white convertible stepped back from the dented bumper. He looked around forty, with short dark hair that was spiked up with gel and wore designer jeans and a white shirt that was partly unbuttoned. He took off his sunglasses and stared in disbelief at the angry young guy who had yelled at him.

"I didn't know it was your private space- I didn't see your _name_ on it!"

The younger guy took a step closer.

"You wrecked my car, you jerk!"

_"You slammed into me!"_

"I asked you to pull out and you _hit_ me!"

_"I didn't see you coming forward!"_

"It's _not_ my fault you didn't look! Who do you think you are to come along and take my spot? What the hell are you doing here anyway?_ This is a military base, you don't belong here, asshole!_ "

"I've got as much right to be here as you!" The older man yelled back, "And _don't_ call me names, you little jerk!"

The younger guy screwed his hand up into a fist ready to take a swing at him on hearing an insult hurled back in his face, and the other guy dodged back even though the younger guy was shorter than him; he was clearly not willing to get into a fist fight over this quarrel...

"If you hit me I'll report you!" He told him.

The younger guy shrugged that off.

"_Report me?_ Ooh, I'm _sooo_ scared! You don't know who I am! _Go ahead, report me, I don't give a fu –_"

"_That's enough!"_ Barked the Commander.

As they turned and saw Briggs standing there looking furious, the younger guy's anger melted away as his eyes grew wide and he looked more than a little guilty.

"Sorry Dad- I...I mean _Sir_."

Briggs was so angry his face was turning red as he glared at his unruly son.

"Find another parking spot and then get your ass over to your living quarters." He said in a low voice, "And apologize to your new colleague Dr Vernon!"

And Martin turned his face away as he smiled:

_ This really was a revelation_ - _that little brat who had just shouted his mouth off over a broken headlight was the Commander's son?_

Nick Briggs saw the anger in his father's eyes and glanced at Dr Vernon.

"Sorry." He said, sounding as if he clearly didn't mean it at all.

He looked the scientist up and down and shook his head.

"_I don't think we'll be working together very long."_ He remarked.

Then he got back into his car and reversed sharply, turning around and finding another parking space far over the other side of the lot.

Doctor Vernon was still smarting from his comment as he watched him parking his car as far away as he could go.

"What did he mean by that?" He wondered aloud, "I got accepted on this team..._eventually_..."

The Commander quickly moved on from the embarrassment his son had caused.

"Martin – this is Dr Sebastian Vernon. Dr Vernon, this is Captain Martin Lee."

The scientist shook hands with him.

"_I'm your co–pilot." _He said proudly.

And Martin glanced back at the dented bumper and the glass scattered nearby from the smashed headlight.

"Nice to meet you." He stated, wondering exactly how well Dr Vernon could navigate anything...

* * *

Moments later after Briggs had walked off in the direction of his son's parked car to have a private word with him, Martin walked towards the living quarters.

He had been walking briskly but as the scientist's voice got further away he slowed his pace until he caught up with him.

"So like I said I've worked in the field of cosmology for twenty years." He told him, "And my call me Vern - my friends call me that..."

And he dragged his heavy case along the ground, stopped to catch his breath and then he started to drag it again.

"Need some help with that?" Martin wondered.

"I can handle it thanks." Vern replied as he started to drag the heavy suitcase once more.

"I didn't think I'd get a place on this mission..."

The suitcase dragged along heavily as he took in another breath, "But eventually my experience in cosmology _and_ my input on the tech side of the design of the craft helped to get me in –"

He dragged the case again and it scraped along the ground.

Martin looked at Vern and guessed he wasn't in bad shape for his age – but he certainly wasn't used to heavy physical exertion. He thought about the tough training program and suddenly felt glad that Briggs had put the two of them together- it _was clear to see that Vern had no idea just how tough this training would be..._

"I need to stop for a minute." He said as he gave up on trying to drag the heavy case.

Martin leaned down and grabbed the handle, lifting the suitcase with relative ease.

"That's okay; I've got it for you. What have you got in here, the kitchen sink?"

"I didn't know what to pack so I threw anything and everything in."

_"It feels like it too!"_

They reached the living quarters and Martin checked the number on the door.

"This is the right room." He said, unlocking it and taking the cases inside.

Vern stepped into the room and looked around.

"There must be a mistake." He said, "This is _my_ room."

"There are two bedrooms. You're my room mate."

Vern stared at him.

"_Room mate?" _He exclaimed, "I was led to believe everyone had their own private accommodation."

"They do."

Martin closed the door and looked back at Vern.

"They all have - except for _you_. Briggs didn't tell me everything but he said you only just made it onto the team. I'm guessing there's a reason for that..."

_And he looked at him intently._

"I'm not going to make a decision about you until I get to know you - I _don't_ judge people on face value. But I don't expect you to lie to me. Why doesn't Briggs trust you?"

Vern looked back at him.

He looked into his eyes and that was the moment their friendship began; that was the moment he chose to trust him.

Vern told the truth:

"I failed a random drugs test a couple of times –but it was ten_ years_ ago!"

Martin was happy to accept that; one look in his eyes was all he needed to feel sure he was being honest and he appreciated that fact.

"Okay. Thanks for telling me."

And then he held his hand out and smiled and his blue eyes shone with warmth.

"_Welcome on board the team, Vern. Stick with me and I'll make sure you get to see outer space."_

And the two men shook hands again, but this time the formality was gone, something passed between them, the beginning of a bond, a deep lasting bond – it was the start of ... _What?_

As Adam watched the scene unfold, he grasped the word as he linked the emotion:

_Friendship._

* * *

Adam opened his eyes and paused as the memory recall shut down, turning off his copy of Martin's memories.

Then he got up and went back into the house.

A soft ringing sound was passing through the air and it was coming from a device that was fixed to the wall.

He watched as Jenny picked it up and the ringing stopped and she started to speak into it.

He recalled humans at this stage of evolution relied on many methods of communication – this one was undoubtedly called _telephone._

Then as she took the call, he went up the stairs, knowing instinctively which room Martin was in.

He pushed the door open and saw him lying on his bed, on his back and sleeping deeply.

He watched him for a moment, wondering why the sight of this human male filled him with such fascination.

Then he went into the room quietly, determined _not_ to rouse him from his slumber...

Adam stood over his bed and let his gaze wander from his face to the rise and fall of his chest as he slept with his shirt open.

Then he reached down and ran his hand over Martins hair; his touch was light as air and Martin did not stir.

Adam recalled Martin's thoughts about Vern and as he tapped into the memory in the softest way that he could, Martin felt no discomfort as he gave sigh and turned his head a little but slept on.

Adam sensed it now:

_There was more._

The day those two men had met had started a friendship, a bond of affection and trust and loyalty and... It was still there, lower than his mind...

He traced the feeling as he tuned into it and closed his eyes as his hand slid from his throat to his upper chest.

Images flashed through his mind:

_Vern was sobbing as he sat on the floor._

"_I can't get through this, Martin!" He said tearfully, "I'll never get through training, I can't do it..."_

_Then Martin's arms were around him as he held onto him tightly and pulled him closer._

"_Yes you can," He whispered softly, "You'll get through this. I won't let you give up..."_

Adam's hand moved with the trace of the memory, as it came to rest against Martin's warm skin he opened his eyes, understanding that human emotions did _not_ stay in the mind - _the feelings he had for this man seemed to dwell within his heart..._

Then Martin stirred and Adam stepped back from the bed.

Martin sat up and blinked and the first thought that hit him was that hangover had finally slipped away thanks to sleep.

Then he glanced at the clock next to bed and thought about his best friend - it was almost eleven o'clock. They had planned to leave for the hospital soon; he needed to be with Vern...

_Then he saw Adam standing there in his room._

"I was asleep." He told him, wondering if his actions needed explanation, "But I'm getting up now. I need to go and see Vern."

Then the bedroom door opened and Martin saw Jenny standing there.

"_Martin..."_

As she said his name he saw the look in her eyes and that same look reflected in his own as tears blurred his vision.

Jenny had not yet explained but as Adam watched Martin's reaction to the look on her face he was taken by surprise that an ache was vaguely present in his own heart – it was the look in Martins eyes that had caused it, along with the certainty that he knew he did not want this human named Martin Lee to feel the mix of pain and sadness that he did at this moment.

He was unsure what had happened, but he knew that Jenny was about to give him some unhappy news.

_And as Adam waited for an explanation, he wondered why he suddenly wanted to reach out to this man and embrace him. _

_He was also aware that he was now filled with a strong desire to shield him from the pain he was feeling at this moment._

_Adam knew he was learning, but right now, exactly what he was coming to understand about human relationships was unclear..._


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Adam remained silent as he got into the car.

He sat in the back and watched as Martin sat in the front with his sister Jenny.

_While they drove, Adam studied Martin_.

Jenny had told him that Vern's condition had become worse and now they were on the way to the hospital to see him.

Adam got the feeling that the humans would have preferred to make this journey without him, but he had got into the car and they had no raised objection and so he was going along with them, hoping to learn more from this experience too.

It troubled him that Martin was so unhappy; he could feel his pain and again a strange urge crept over him to put his arms around this man and hold him close, to warm him, to have his body close to his own.

_He thought about what Jenny had said about Martin being gay_.

He thought again about his _own_ preferences and drew a blank, because on his home planet if sexual relations were not for the purpose of creating life the act was regarded as pointless.

_Gay _was not on his planet.

He wondered what his world would be like if _gay_ was a part of his world, and then a faint smile came to Adam's lips although yet again, he wasn't sure why...

* * *

When they arrived at the hospital Adam followed Jenny and Martin into Vern's room.

He stayed by the open doorway and watched as Jenny leaned over the bed, saying quietly to Vern that Scott would be on his way as soon as he got the message.

Then Martin sat down and put his arm around Vern and pulled him closer, holding him gently as he stroked his hair.

He began to speak softly to him and Adam sensed they would both be staying with Vern until the end now; the former scientist was _very_ weak and would not live much longer...

Adam left the room and walked down the corridor, he found some empty chairs and sat down. He looked left and right and saw no one was close by and as the disc on his finger began to spin, he touched it to his smallest tattoo, then fixed his gaze on the wall so that any passers by would assume he was simply waiting for someone.

Then he switched his vision to the _inner_ mode and re-accessed Martin's memory of the start of training for the Solar Four Mission:

_Martin and Vern were in their new living quarters._

"I think we'll get along okay." Vern said as he stood in his room with his case wide open.

Martin stood in the doorway looking slightly bemused as he watched Vern packing dozens of colorful shirts, silk ties, three suits, eleven pairs of designer jeans...

"I think you'll be all day unpacking that lot!"He exclaimed.

"It won't take me long," Vern replied," I'll be done in a couple of hours..."

Martin walked away from his room and was thinking about going to his own bedroom to unpack, when he heard the sound of a car pulling up outside.

He left Vern to unpack and went outside.

A car had just pulled up a short distance away, ignoring the fact that cars were _supposed_ to be parked in the parking area.

A passenger door opened a little boy aged around six jumped out. He had dark curly hair and big blue eyes.

_"Wow!"_ He exclaimed, _"I want to see the spaceship!"_

Then a little girl with blonde hair who looked younger than her brother scrambled from the car.

_"What spaceship?"_ She wondered.

"Kids!" Called their father, "Wait up for me and Mommy!"

As a young woman with fair hair like her daughter got out of the car she leaned in the back to take the baby out of the car.

Then her husband got out and went up behind her, siding his arms around her waist and pulling her back for a moment.

"No, leave the baby, honey. The kids can't stay for more than five minutes..."

She turned around and looked up at her husband, a tall, slim guy with wavy hair who was smiling as his eyes sparkled with excitement.

"I'm going up to space again!" He said excitedly, and lifted the woman off her feet and kissed her warmly.

She was laughing as he put her back down.

"Okay Erin," He said, "I'll let the kids see my room and then you have to take them home."

She gave a sigh.

"Okay, Joey..."

Joey Avision took a key from his jacket pocket and held it up.

"Wanna see Daddy's room?" He asked the children, who nodded and smiled eagerly.

"Okay..."

Joey unlocked the door.

The boy shoved it open and ran inside, the girl followed and Erin stood by the open car door laughing as Joey's eyes widened as he watched the kids tear off inside.

"I'd better watch 'em!" He said, and he went into his room.

Erin stepped closer to the doorway and giggled.

_There was the squeaking of a mattress as their son jumped up and down on the bed._

_Their daughter had found the bathroom and was having fun running the water._

"Want me to go and get them?" Erin wondered as she looked up at her husband, "They _never_ listen when you tell them to stop, you're way too soft, you know that..."

Joey put his bags down and looked at his son.

"Don't jump on that bed, Joey Jnr. Daddy's got to sleep on that!"

The boy was still jumping as he spoke to his father.

"But it's got a _lot _of bounce! A _lot,_ Dad!"

A playful smile crept onto Joey's face...

"_A lot?"_

His son, still jumping up and down, smiled back at him.

"_A LOT!"_

"What the hell..." Said Joey, kicking off his shoes.

"Joey!" Erin said in surprise, "Stop it, _stop the stupidity!_ If Briggs saw you doing that he'd go crazy!"

The bed was squeaking even louder as father and son started jumping together.

"I can jump higher than you!" Joey said raising his arm, "Yay, I did it, I can touch the ceiling!"

Erin had planned to sharply tell their son to get off the bed but as father and son continued to play she smiled and shook her head.

Then water ran _much_ louder from the bathroom and she dashed in to find her daughter pressing her hand flat against the tap, making the water spurt out everywhere.

"No Chloe!" She told her, turning the taps off, "Oh no, the bathrooms all wet!"

"I can dry it." Chloe said, grabbing a clean bath towel from a nearby rail and tossing it on to the floor and then wiping it about with her foot.

"No, that's a _clean_ towel!" Erin said to her.

Chloe looked up at her Mom and smiled.

"I know. _Daddy does it all the time at home_."

"With the clean towels?"

Chloe nodded.

"And he plays _sticky ons_ too!"

Erin looked at her in confusion.

"_Sticky ons?"_

The little girl ran over to the toilet paper spool and tore off some paper.

She ran it under the cold water, got it soggy and squeezed it into a ball, then threw it up into the air where it hit the ceiling with a _splat_ and stuck there.

"_That's_ a sticky on!" Chloe announced.

"I thought your brother did that to the bathroom!"

"No, Daddy does it, "She told her, "It's _funny!_"

Erin recalled all the times she had used the handle of a broom to knock toilet paper off the ceiling of their bathroom at home.

_"Sticky ons?"_ She said to Joey, who gave one more big bounce and jumped off the bed.

"What?"

"You've been throwing wet toilet paper on the ceiling at home? I thought it was the kids."

He blinked and amusement sparkled in his eyes.

"It _was_ me!" He said proudly, "We used to play that game at school when I was a little kid, so I thought I'd play it with our kids! _It was fun!_"

The baby started to cry and she turned back to walk out to the car.

Martin had been standing in the door way watching and he laughed.

"_Sticky ons?"_ He said, "Don't let Briggs know!"

Joey laughed as he took hold of his son's hand and led him outside.

"I won't!" He told him, then Chloe wandered outside too and waited as her mother settled the baby and Joey Jnr got back into the car.

She looked up at her father.

"_I'll miss you, Daddy."_

Joey felt an ache in his heart.

"I won't be gone long." He promised her, and then his eyes lit up again.

"Training for a space mission is fun! Some of it's like those big scary roller coasters I like riding on! And I'll be coming home every other weekend. I'll see you soon."

As he leaned down she hugged him and he held on to his little girl for a moment and then let go as he watched her get back into the car.

Erin turned and looked up at her husband.

"Take care, Joey."

"I always do! Don't worry about me!"

He put his arms around her and held her, squeezing her as he kissed her gently and then kissed her again.

As he pulled back from that kiss he looked deeply into her eyes.

"I'll call you every night."

Erin blinked away tears.

"I know you will - but it's never easy saying goodbye."

His face lit up in big smile.

"Hey, I'm Joey Avision, I'm an astronaut! I can do _anything!_ Don't get upset, I'll be just fine. _I love you_."

"I love you too." Erin said softly and they kissed a final time before she got back into the car.

Joey stood there waving until the car was far off into the distance and about to turn the corner to exit the premises.

Then he gave a sigh.

_"Oh I miss my family already!"_ He said.

Then he turned to see Martin standing beside him.

"I know you –you're Captain Martin Lee."

Martin smiled and held out his hand.

"And you're the Mars Mission guy. Nice to meet you, Joey."

They shook hands.

Vern stuck his head out of the doorway.

"Hi." He said quietly, unsure if he was about to make a new friend or gain another enemy.

He looked as if he was about to duck back in there and lose himself in a few more hours unpacking, so Martin called to him.

"Vern – come out here and meet Joey Avision."

The scientist came out of the doorway and shook hands with Joey.

"Hi – I'm Doctor Vernon – call me Vern. I 've heard your name before! You're the guy who flew the Mars Missions."

Joey's face lit up in a big smile.

"_Mars was fun!"_ He exclaimed.

And Vern smiled back at him.

"I can't tell you how thrilled I am to be on this mission, Joey. I remember when I was a little boy, I saw the first moon landing on the TV and that was the moment that changed my life- from that day on I knew I'd _always_ want to get there some day. That's why I'm so thrilled to be on this mission!"

Joy's eyes grew wider.

"_But Vern,"_ He said, hoping the bad news wouldn't come as too much of a shock to him, _"This mission doesn't go to the moon!"_

Vern looked at him with confusion in his eyes.

"Well I know that, Joey – I meant, I've always wanted to go up in _space_. I didn't _just_ mean the moon."

"Oh I get it," Joey replied, "Sorry about that –I thought you meant you had a thing for the moon..."

"No, I meant outer space in general. Not _just_ the moon."

"Okay..."

Martin smiled and shook his head as he watched their conversation unfold:

_Joey Avison was a fine astronaut, he was known for his fearless attitude towards space exploration – but he wasn't the sharpest guy in the world. But at least he got along with Vern, even if Nick didn't..._

And as the thought of Nick crossed his mind, he walked up to them after having left his bags outside a door at the end of the block.

"You must be Captain Lee."

He held his hand out and briefly greeted him.

"I guess you know by now I'm Officer Nick Briggs."

"Yeah, I worked it out." Martin replied, "Have you met Joey Avison before?"

"No but I've heard of you." He said, turning briefly to Joey, "Two mars missions- that's impressive. But I guess you'd have to be good at _something_ to get on this job."

And he shot a frosty, lingering look towards Vern, who couldn't resist taking the bait.

"I'm a cosmologist with twenty years experience!" He reminded him, "I'm on this team because of my expertise!"

"That's right, keep telling yourself that." Nick said, "But you're _still_ a civilian. And I heard on the grapevine that you almost got fired a few years back - is that right, Vern? _Tested positive for amphetamines twice, didn't you?_"

Vern glared at him.

"That's in the past."

"_All the same I'm not too hot on the idea of being up there with the first junkie in space..."_

Vern made a move to step forward but Martin caught his arm, pulling him back sharply.

"I won't have fighting on my team." He stated, fixing Nick with a hard stare, "You can push me but only so far. And you can go and tell your Daddy I said that if you don't like it. _We're a team. We have to get along_. If we can't do that, how the hell could we cope if there was a problem up there? I'm only prepared to work with colleagues who work _together,_ Nick."

"I know that, I...I was just saying..."

And Martin was _still_ fixing him with that hard look.

Nick fell silent for a moment.

_"I've got stuff to do."_ He said quickly, then just as he was about to turn to leave, he almost collided with a tall, slender woman no older than thirty who had short blonde hair and sparkling green eyes.

"Hello." She said, her English plain to understand but the accent clearly Russian, "I am Maritsa Ivanov. It is good to meet my fellow members of the team."

She shook hands with Nick, who was there first, moving with lightening speed to grab her hand. Next came Joey, who briefly shook her hand and made her smile when he said, _"I don't know any Russian but I'll remember to call you comrade..."_

Martin glanced at Vern.

_The scientist was looking at Maritsa as if spellbound._

She held her hand out to him.

"And you are?"

"Vern." He said, blushing slightly as they shook hands, "Doc Vernon...Call me Vern, my friends do."

And he smiled again and this time his blush grew deeper and he looked down at the floor.

"I must go and organize my belongings." She stated, "I will see you all later on, we can become aquainted much better."

And she turned and walked back up towards her own room.

Vern's gaze was still fixed on her.

"She is _so _beautiful!" He said quietly.

Nick glanced back, watching her walk away, pausing to admire the way her hips swayed as she walked in low heels and a short black skirt.

"And so far," Nick said, "She's the only member of this team I've got _really_ along with."

"_Maybe she likes you because she doesn't know you yet." _Vern remarked._  
_

Nick glared at Vern, who took a step back, feeling sure that Nick looked like he was just about ready to land him a punch for saying that.

"I don't know _why_ my father put this team together." He said sharply, glancing at the three men who stood in front of him, "I mean what _have_ we got? Okay Martin you're a flier, you're one of the best. But I can tell you don't _like_ me because I speak my mind. And Joey, you're a great astronaut, but I guess there won't be much intelligent conversation going on with _you_ around!"

Joey missed the insult and smiled.

"I like to keep the conversation light; I'm a light kind of guy."

Nick looked back at Vern.

"And we also have a _civilian_ on board – a co-pilot who can't even park his own _car_ without hitting mine - and on top of that, he's got a history of _drug abuse_. That's just great. _They should have left us all at home and sent a bunch of clowns on this mission instead!_"

Then he turned and walked away.

Martin watched him leave and shook his head.

"I don't care if he's the Commander's son – he won't push me much further before I lose my temper. I don't tolerate an attitude like that in a working team. If he doesn't adjust his attitude I'm speaking to Briggs about him."

At the mention of Briggs, Joey's eyes grew wider.

_"I'd better get the toilet paper off the bathroom ceiling!"_ He exclaimed, tuning away and going back into his room.

Vern looked at Martin with a puzzled expression.

"_Toilet paper?"_

Martin smiled.

"Don't ask! Have you unpacked now, Vern?"

"Almost - it's half done."

"I'll help." Martin said, "Otherwise you'll be all day doing this. I'll help you get organized."

"Thanks, Martin." Vern replied.

And the two men went back into their shared room to finish unpacking.

* * *

As the scene faded away, Adam touched the tattoo on his upper arm and the swirling stopped and the world came slowly back into focus as once again he closed down his copy of Martin's memories.

Adam sat up straight in his seat and looked down the hospital corridor, watching as a young man hurried in his direction.

He did not know him but instinct told him he felt a link to him in some way – he was human and yet..._something _told him, a brief passing feeling, that this man was so much _more_ than just a human...

"_Scott Hayden?"_ He wondered.

The man stopped in his tracks, staring at Adam.

"Is it true?" He said in a hushed voice, "_Are _you like my father?

Adam nodded.

"I come from the same world but I am a biological cyborg, the result of a war our people suffered. I am from far in the future on your father's home planet."

Scott stared at him, studying his face and wishing he would see some kind of similarity with his own father- _but he saw none._

"My Mom called. She left a message, she told me about you." He said, "I want to speak with you, I want to learn _all_ about your people and your world."

Then he blinked away tears.

"But my Mom also said Vern's dying. I have to be with him, I need to see him right now."

Adam looked into his eyes and saw pain reflected there, the same kind of pain Martin felt at the thought of his loss - but Scott's pain as not as deep as Martin's - _no one could grieve more sharply for Vern than Martin did..._

Adam watched as Scott went into Vern's room and then he followed, stepping inside and closing the door.

He noticed Jenny glanced at him and again he wondered if he ought to be here because these humans were highly distraught – but Jenny sat down by the window and said nothing and Adam remained standing by the closed door, watching as Scott leaned over Vern and gently touched his face as he spoke tearfully to him.

Vern gave no reaction, lying there breathing weakly as Martin sat on the edge of his bed holding him in his arms.

"Do you think he can hear us?" Scott asked his Uncle.

Martin looked down at Vern's closed eyes as he breathed slowly as he held him.

"I don't think so, Scott." He said quietly, "I don't think he's been aware of anything since the crash."

"_He has."_

As Adam spoke up, Jenny turned away from the window and Martin and Scott both looked at him.

"What do you mean, Adam?" Martin said in a low voice as he held Vern in his arms.

Adam walked over to the bed and reached out, the silver disk sliding from his index finger as he ran his hand gently over Vern's hair.

Recalling the pain he had felt when Adam had copied his own memories, he shot him a warning look.

"Don't hurt him with that thing!"

Adam gently moved his hand over the scars beneath Vern's hair.

"I can't hurt him. He feels little of his physical body. He is damaged; it's difficult to find a way to reach him..."

He slid his hand around to the back of his head and suddenly he could sense what remained of his thoughts in his damaged mind.

"He dreams." He stated, "Voices, familiar names...he dreams about memories..._good _memories. He heard you speaking and he dreamed he was back in space before the accident. _He was experiencing the joy of seeing outer space for the first time all over again_."

Tears stung at Martin's eyes.

"He's not suffering?"

"No." Adam replied, "You can give him some happiness, too. Say something to him that will make him think of a happy time and he will be back in the moment."

Martin looked into Adams dark eyes and Adam nodded.

"_It will be a gift for him," _He promised_, "The last one you can give."_

On hearing those words Martin felt tearful all over again.

He kept his arm around Vern and stroked his hair, then he leaned closer, recalling how after months of getting no where, Vern had finally got together with Maritsa Ivanov. He remembered how happy Vern had been that day – and he remembered what he had said to him and then he repeated those same words:

"_Vern,"_ He whispered in his ear, _"She's all yours now – you finally melted the Ice Queen."_

And Vern's eyes stayed closed and his body remained motionless, but the ghost of a smile played about his lips for a moment.

Martin knew tears were running down his face but he let it happen as he held on to his best friend.

_"I love you Vern."_ He whispered, _"I'm here, I've got you..."_

And Vern smiled again as he gave a sigh.

_He breathed slowly, peacefully and then his breathing stopped_.

Jenny saw tears in Scott's eyes and she got up and hurried over to him, taking hold of her son as he pressed his face against her shoulder.

Adam watched as Martin continued to cradle Vern in his arms.

He looked down at his face as he spoke to him.

_"It's over now,"_ He whispered as he stroked his hair and then gently touched his face, _"It's all over, Vern...you can rest in peace now..."_

Adam had heard Martin's words and as he looked at Vern and remembered the man he had seen through the copy of Martin's memories, he understood the fact that this human was dead - and it gave him an ache around his heart as he wished this human had not ceased to live.

Then he looked at Martin and saw him holding his dead friend, and that pain became so sharp it brought tears to his own eyes and Adam knew he wanted to hold him much in the way Jenny Hayden had comforted her son Scott, except that Adam wanted to hold Martin tightly, not let him go, not even _think_ about letting go until his tears had stopped.

But he couldn't hold him because Martin was still cradling Vern in his arms and telling his friend how much he loved him:

_Love._

_It was a word that Adam was yet to comprehend, but he knew it dwelled within the heart and it could be deep and beautiful or sharp and painful, yet every human seemed to have the capacity for it..._

* * *

Adam left the room and closed the door behind him, leaving the humans to grieve while he waited outside wondering why tears had formed in his own eyes making his vision blurred and the ache in his heart feel heavy.

He waited a long time for the humans to leave the dead man's room.

When they finally came out of the door they all looked equally tearful and Martin walked off ahead of Jenny and Scott.

Adam glanced back at Jenny and her son and then looked up the corridor and knew he needed to be at Martin's side.

He hurried after him, down the corridor and towards the exit.

When he walked out of the hospital he found Martin had walked over to a garden area and now he was looking thoughtfully into a pond surrounded by flowers. Then he sat down on a bench and Adam went over and sat beside him.

_"You feel loss."_ He stated.

Martin's eyes were still filled with tears.

"I lost him on the day of the crash. The guy I remember, the man I knew, he was gone that day. But it doesn't make it any easier to say goodbye."

_"You loved him?"_

Adam's voice was soft as he looked thoughtfully at him.

Martin nodded his head and then he managed a smile as he recalled his closest friend.

"He was one of those guys –you couldn't _help_ but love him."

"_What is love?"_ Adam wondered.

Martin took in a sharp breath as he tried to find a definition for the indefinable.

"Love is a need, a feeling, a strong connection. It's something that can be wonderful or it can make you feel as if your heart has broken in two. It's the best and worst feeling depending on where it leads to, but _every_ human being on the planet feels this emotion, needs it – that's one of the reasons we survive no matter how hard times get- because of those we love, because of the people close to our hearts."

Adam thought about what he had just said.

Martin was looking into the water now, lost somewhere as dark as the depths of the pond, where still waters ran cold and deep.

"Is love _always_ shared? Is love returned?"

Martin was still looking into the water.

"Not always, sometimes it is – sometimes in the way we want to be, other times not. Sometimes it's deep and wonderful and fragile and beautiful and it just stays there in your heart, it's the kind of thing you think about when you wake up in the middle of the night and you think of a person you care about. Love isn't always shared. Sometimes it's kept quiet and it just stays inside. I loved Vern. But I didn't love him as a partner, I loved him as a _friend_."

And Martin smiled as he thought about him.

"There was time when I took him in my arms because he was upset. I hugged him, we kissed – then he looked at me and I looked at him and we both knew it was going nowhere because he was a straight guy- by that I mean he liked women. He fell in love with another member of the team, Maritsa Ivanov. He chased her for the best part of a year and in the end he got her. _But it came too late_..."

Martin blinked back tears as he looked at Adam.

"The three crew members who died are buried at a military cemetary not far from here. I expect they'll bury Vern there too. I hope they do – he'll be close to Maritsa again."

"He chose her as his life partner?" Adam wondered.

Martin nodded.

"He told me he asked her to marry him."

And tears stung at his eyes again and he wiped them away as he looked back at Adam once more.

"He asked her to marry him and she said she'd give him her answer when they touched down at Mission Control when the mission was over. But it wasn't to be. So he never got his answer, but I'm pretty sure she would have said yes. I often think about all of the crew and I wonder what they'd be doing now if they'd lived. "

Adam looked at him curiously.

"Why?"

"Because life is important, Adam. Every _single life is significant, it matters. One life can change the whole world_. And this world is missing four people who should still be here. I often think about it – if Joey had lived he'd probably still be flying space missions, and he'd still be here for his wife and kids. He'd probably have another kid by now, he told me he wanted a large family. And Vern and Maritsa would have got married- Vern would have been so happy with her. I don't know about Nick, maybe he'd still be the little jerk I remember but who knows, he might have finally grown up and stopped embarrassing his father. I know Commander Briggs was devastated when he found out Nick was dead. He blamed himself; all his life he'd given his son everything he wanted, then as he got older he pulled strings and used his influence to get him up the career ladder. And when Nick wanted a place on the Solar Four Mission, he got him that too. _Commander Briggs signed the paperwork that got him the place on the mission that killed him_."

Adam was still silent as he listened intently.

Martin thought about the best way to explain cause and effect:

"It's like dominoes- you line them up and knock one down and the rest fall- that's what life is like – chains of events, things that we do or decide on- it has an effect. And _that's_ the difficult part –no one knows what the future may bring, that's why this disaster happened. _No one saw it coming until it was too late._"

Adam knew for sure that deep sorrow was in Martin's heart and again he got the urge to do something ease his pain.

He shifted closer but did not embrace him, feeling unsure if he wanted to be embraced right now.

"So love is significant to _all_ life?"

Martin nodded.

"Love is something that we _all_ have in common – we all feel it, need it, and can't be without it in many different ways. I cared for every one of those people who were on the mission. I loved Vern and I can never replace him – there will _never_ be another Doc Vernon in this world. People are precious, they _can't_ be replaced. I shall miss him forever; can you understand what I'm trying to explain?"

Martin's eyes had filled with tears again.

Adam's dark eyes fixed him with sympathy and his voice was soft as he held out muscular, tattooed arms.

"_I should embrace you?"_

Martin leaned closer and placed his head on Adam's shoulder as he sobbed.

Adam wrapped his arms around him, holding him tightly, feeling as if his embrace was a cocoon where this distressed human male could shelter from all that made him weep.

"I feel that I should do more to help you, Martin." He stated, "But I don't know how I should do this."

"_You can't change the past."_ He stated, _"So you can't help me."_

Then he let go of him and as he let go, Martin looked at Adam and felt sudden warmth towards the man from another world.

"Thank you for being so kind." He said, "For comforting me."

As he wiped his eyes Jenny and Scott walked into the garden area and Martin got up and so did Adam.

"The hospital has informed Commander Briggs." She said, "And Briggs said that he's going to make sure Vern gets the kind of funeral he deserves. He wants him to have full military honors in light of the fact that he was a crew member of the Solar Four."

Martin thought about Vern and Jenny's words brought him comfort.

"_He always wanted to be a hero."_ He said, _"He would have been so proud to think he got such a big send off."_

Then Martin got up and walked ahead, needing to be alone as they made their way back to the parking area.

* * *

Much later as dusk gave way to nightfall, Scott sat in the front room and looked at Adam with fascination.

"Tell me about your world." He said, "I need to know _everything, _because you are the same race as my father and I need answers."

"My planet is far away." Adam stated, "And _very_ different to your word. It used to be a beautiful place but the war destroyed everything and we had to rebuild..."

And Jenny watched the conversation unfold, feeling a quiet sense of peace despite the fact that today had been the day they'd lost Vern – it was almost like a healing was taking place for her son to meet another of his father's kind, to gain some kind of understanding of where he came from. Meeting Adam was providing an insight he needed to have; _Adam had come to earth to learn, but at that moment, her son was learning from Adam..._

The two of them talked until the stars were out and the moon was glowing in the blackness of the sky.

Adam described a solar system far away, the planets within it and the way his world had been devastated by a war that changed his planet forever.

And then Adam had stopped talking and looked towards the open door.

_Martin had not called to him but he felt as if he had..._

"I must rest now." He stated, "Synthetic cyborg technology allows me live on your planet but it has also humanized my people in many ways- we need sleep on a nightly basis."

Scott smiled.

"Sleep well Adam – and thank you for telling me about your world."

Adam smiled back briefly and then followed Jenny out of the room.

She led him upstairs to the spare room at the end of the hall and he thanked her and said goodnight.

* * *

Adam waited until Jenny had gone back down stairs once more and then he stood silently in the room, tuning into the sadness he could feel coming from Martin.

It was the same feeling he had in his heart back at the hospital- a deep sense of loss, of mourning for a man who couldn't be replaced.

_He knew he did not want Martin to be alone while he felt so distressed._

Adam left his own room and went across the hall, then let himself into Martin's room and closed the door behind him.

Martin was sleeping on top of the bed with his shirt off but the rest of his clothing still on. His closed eyes looked red from crying and as he stepped closer to his bed he noticed Martin's wallet was open on the bedside table.

_Inside that wallet was a picture of Martin and Vern smiling for the camera._

Vern had his arm around him and a beer bottle in his free hand. Seeing him in life was a sharp contrast to the man Adam had watched dying in the hospital; here Vern looked happy, his eyes were sparkling and suddenly Adam understood what Martin had meant when he said the day of the accident had taken the _real_ Vern away - here this man looked full of life- and by the way he had gone to sleep with that picture open in full view he guessed he had fallen asleep looking at the image of his lost friend.

_"I am sorry for your loss."_ He whispered, keen not to wake him because he was sure if he woke up sad thoughts would crowd his mind and cause him to weep once more.

Then Adam sat down on the edge of Martin's bed.

He placed his hand softly over his heart, feeling it beating warm inside his chest:

_Yes, Martin was right – he knew it as sure as he felt his heart beating – life mattered very much, every single life mattered in its own right because life was precious, he knew that now because as he thought about Martin's lost friend he was suddenly thankful that Martin was very much alive and here in this world..._

As he watched his breathing rise and fall Adam studied his face - and as he did so got the urge to lean closer.

As Martin slept, Adam's lips brushed his cheek, then as he thought about how he wanted to comfort this man, he leaned closer still and kissed Martin softly; their lips met and as Martin stirred from sleep Adam stepped back towards the door, leaving him to rest.

He closed the door behind him and went back to his own room, where he sat by the window looking out at the darkened sky and thinking of a failed space mission that had caused such sadness to Martin Lee, the human male who he was starting to feel concern for. He did not know why, but as he thought of Martin he knew wished he could be at his side, to hold him come daybreak when he woke up and remembered Vern was gone, so that he could hold him and remind him that he was not alone.

_He never wanted Martin to be alone._

Those thoughts confused him because he could not process them...

Then Adam lay back on the bed and looked out at the night sky, thinking about the distance between Earth and his home planet, then he thought again about the Solar Four mission and craft that fell from the skies and the lives that were lost.

Then he thought again of Martin, felt thankful that he had survived and was unharmed, then with his thoughts still on Martin, Adam closed his eyes and fell asleep, still aware of the fact that he did _not_ want a wall to divide him from Martin, he wanted them to be together, to be close... but even as that thought ran through his mind, he did not understand the reasons why.

And then Adam slept deeply, welcoming rest because processing the copy of Martin's memories was tiring.

_And_ _there would be more processing tomorrow, because the story of the Solar Four team had only just started to unfold, his mission to discover and learn had only just begun..._


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Martin felt worn out with the sadness that washed over him as he woke up to a bright morning and that split second between sleeping and waking wore off and everything came rushing back at him:

_Vern was gone_.

Everything about the world outside his window seemed out of place, as if this life had been meant to turn out differently, but for the crash of the Solar Four.

After he showered to feel properly awake and he had got dressed, Martin went downstairs and as he reached the bottom of the stairs he saw Scott was leaving for work.

He looked back at him and sadness reflected in his eyes.

"I'll miss him too." He said, "Vern was a friend to me and I'll never forget him either."

Then the sadness lifted from his voice a little.

"But I got to have a long conversation with Adam last night. It means a lot to me, to hear about where my father came from. I _need_ that connection."

Martin nodded.

"I know you do, it's a good thing he can give you that."

Then he looked around and wondered where he had got to.

"Where _is_ Adam?"

"He had breakfast with me and Mom. Then he went outside."

And then Scott remembered something else.

"_He said he was waiting for you."_

Martin wasn't sure why but those words gave him a jolt as he thought about Adam- it was almost as if he had expected him to say that, as if he had known on some deeper level while he slept that Adam would want to see him alone that morning...

"Thanks." He said to his nephew.

Then his sister spoke up.

"Okay, I've got everything..."

And she picked up her car keys.

"You're going out?"

Martin had surprised himself at the way he had just said that – he wondered, was he nervous at the thought of being alone with Adam?

Jenny stared at him for a moment, surprised by his question.

"Yes, I have to go to the bank and I have some shopping to do, I know things have been far from normal lately but life _has_ to go on, Martin. Adam expressed an interest in seeing the town and the stores but I think it's best if you keep him here- keep him _safe_. It wouldn't do him any good to attract attention."

"I know that."Martin replied, only too aware that what his sister had just said made perfect sense- Adam looked human in every way, but he knew so little about this world that it seemed wise to keep his presence as quiet as possible.

"I'll see you later." His sister said.

Then she walked out the door and Martin watched as she got into her son's car.

Scott started the engine and they drove away and Martin closed the door again.

He thought about what Jenny had said about life having to go on - he knew she was right, but to him it just didn't feel that way; _everything he had been through in life made him feel as if that statement was totally wrong because life hadn't gone on, not for him, not since the Solar Four disaster..._

Then Martin turned back and walked down the hall, wondering why Adam had left the message that he was waiting for him...

* * *

Adam was standing in the middle of the lawn.

He knew Martin had come into the garden and he knew he was walking up to him, but although sensing his presence gave him a warm and welcoming sensation, he could not take his eyes from the blue sky above.

He kept his gaze fixed on all that lie above as he thought about all that stretched beyond it and how fragile this planet really was...

_"Adam?"_

The tall, muscular man finally turned his gaze from the heavens and his dark eyes met with Martin's eyes that reflected blue as the skies.

"_I watched you sleeping."_

Martin felt surprised by those words:

_ Adam had been in his room while he slept?_

"Why did you do that?"

The tattooed man who looked so strong yet spoke so gently half smiled.

"I'm not sure. But I do know that I wanted to be close to you. I decided not to wake you; I didn't want you to wake so soon and recall deep distress at the death of your friend. I've studied your memories of your first meeting with Vern – I know and understand that he is in your heart."

"He will always be in there." Martin told him, "That will never change. That's the only place we can keep the people we've lost, it's the only way to hold on to them."

Adam took a step closer and looked deeper into Martin's eyes, feeling sure that being this close to him was the best thing to do, because it was a thought that had been on his mind for a while now - that he needed to be close to this man...

"I would like to hold on to you." He stated, "In my heart..."

And he fell silent and his gaze turned back to the flawless sky as his thoughts shifted far away.

"Adam?"

He gave no reply, still looking into the beyond.

Martin put his hands on his shoulders.

_"Adam!"_

As he turned his attention back to him he was aware Martin was still holding onto him, but Adam found this closeness to be quite pleasant and chose not to step back.

"Why do you speak as if something troubles you?" He wondered.

"Because of what you said." Martin replied, "You said you want to keep me in your heart? You sound as if you're leaving this planet tomorrow!"

"I only have a matter of days here." Adam stated, "That is something I can't change. I _must_ leave when the time arrives."

There was something about the way he said that; it sent a chill down Martin's spine but he wasn't sure why.

"When _what_ time arrives? Are your people coming to fetch you?"

"No, I have an energy cell to return me to my own time and place."

And his gaze briefly shifted to the skies again, then back to Martin.

"Why do you keep doing that?" Martin asked him, "Why do you keep looking at the sky as if you're waiting for something? Are there more like you coming to Earth?"

_Adam fell silent as he thought about all the things he knew and could not share with Martin; he knew this man missed nothing..._

"I will miss you _and_ your world." He said softly, "But the only time we have is now. I can't look towards a future that I do not have on this planet."

Martin searched his eyes for a hint of what Adam was trying to convey but then Adam pull him closer sharply, pressing his lips against his own and Martin closed his eyes as the man from another world embraced him, welcoming his kiss and getting lost in it as their kiss grew deeper.

It was such a human way; two people from different places, different worlds, meeting like this, embracing, becoming locked in that embrace and sharing a kiss that made them both long for more and for the moment to never end.

_In that moment their difference did not matter, it was as if their worlds had collided and become as one._

Then the moment was gone as Adam pulled back from their kiss and stared at him with his dark eyes wide.

"I'm getting an urge to mate." He stated, thinking of the previous man of his own kind who had come to earth, the father of Jenny Hayden's son.

Martin smiled as his eyes sparkled.

"I _think_ I know what you mean!"

But Adam still felt bewildered.

"I am sorry Martin – but my biological function and the purpose of it would fail. _I can not give you a baby_."

Martin laughed softly as he shook his head.

"That's good to know, Adam!"

But Adam still looked utterly confused.

"So why am I responding as if you are a mate?"

Martin knew for sure now; he had been attracted to this man since the day they first met. Now he was getting to know him he was caught between wanting to run his hands over his muscular body and do all the things that came naturally to him, or to wrap his arms around him and protect this innocent stranger who knew nothing of life on this planet.

"Because you like me and I like you and that's a good thing, it means we have a bond..."

Martin reached out and put his hand to Adam's face.

"I don't know whether I should love you or protect you or both." He said softly, "But I _do_ know I don't want to let you go."

"I think my world does not understand _gay_." Adam stated, "But I believe that I do. _I believe that I am the same as you_."

Martin gently pulled him closer.

"_I believe you could be right."_ He said softly, and kissed him again.

* * *

_He took him in from the garden and up to his room._

The man from the stars needed no instruction as he took off his clothes and wrapped his arms around Martin and shared more kisses that grew deeper as Martin ran his hands over the tattoos that covered his arms. Beneath his touch they did not move or shift and his flesh felt warm and human.

Martin held him close as they lay together and he looked into the darkness of his eyes.

"_They remind me of space."_ He whispered, _"Your eyes – it's as if I can see the whole of the cosmos in you."_

"And yours remind me of Earth sky." Adam said quietly, "I shall always remember you when I recall the skies of this planet."

And then he thought about all that Martin did _not_ know, about facts he was aware of that he had _not_ shared - and the weight of that knowledge began to feel heavy:

_He had not expected for such a bond to grow with this man._

_He felt as if he were learning about himself as much as he was learning from Martin's memories._

_Now he felt this way, he felt as if he wanted to hide nothing from him..._

Adam opened his mouth to speak but his words were snatched away by a sharp breath as Martin's kisses shifted from his shoulder to his chest and then moved lower and lower still until he took another sudden breath and tensed, taking in new sensations that he had not expected to feel.

Martin's hands closed firmly around his tattooed arms as he pinned him down and Adam breathed out slowly, losing himself in the intimacy of his kisses as those kisses moved lower and then he knew nothing but bliss and the need to surrender...

* * *

As the sun rose higher in the mid morning sky Adam lay beside Martin with his hand resting on his chest as he felt the beat of his heart and the rise and fall of his chest as he breathed easily.

"We shared pleasure." He stated, "I'm glad."

And Martin looked into his eyes and smiled.

"That's the whole point of it. Sex doesn't have to be just for reproduction – even for males and females who decide to be together. It's about sharing mutual feelings and pleasure. And that is the same for everyone, no matter who they are with."

And Adam smiled back at him, but then his smile faded.

"I am really starting to like your world." He said, but his dark eyes seemed troubled once more.

"So maybe you can stay." Martin suggested.

That ache was back in Adam's chest that he had come to understand now, this was what Martin had explained about how love could be painful:

_Martin was in his heart now and his heart was aching at the thought that in a matter of days he would have to leave this world..._

"I need to be outside." He stated, "I can process your memories anywhere but I refer the garden, I like it out there."

And he got up and headed for the door.

Martin watched him walk to the door and then he called his name.

Adam looked back and Martin laughed.

"Put your clothes on first – you _can't_ go in the garden naked."

Adam thanked him for saying that and picked up his clothes.

Martin stayed in bed as he watched him get dressed.

He was still smiling at the thought that Adam had almost walked out of the house with nothing on – but as Adamleft the room he turned hs thoughts to everything they had shared he started to wonder about what would happen when Adam had to leave:

Their friendship had deepened since his arrival and thinking about what they had shared that morning partly lifted him out of his sadness at Vern's death. When he was with Adam, this man who knew so little about his world, he felt as if _everything_ was brand new... Adam had been so surprised when he had kissed down his body and given him such pleasure – and it hadn't taken him long to return the favor, Adam had been very excited to explore his body and run his hands over him and kiss him gently as he found out how good it could feel to share such needs and affections.

_Martin wondered how Adam would feel when the time came for him to leave._

_It was something he didn't want to think about because he knew he never wanted that day to come..._

* * *

Adam sat alone in the garden and thought everything he had shared with Martin.

He felt as if the closeness they now enjoyed was something that had gone into this own heart and it felt right for that love to be there.

_Now he was coming to understand what love meant._

But he also knew much more and again he thought about the facts he had _not_ shared with Martin:

_Perhaps he would tell him later, when the time was right..._

He switched off his personal thoughts about this human who come to mean so much to him all of a sudden and he touched the spinning disk that slid from is fingertip to his smallest tattoo.

_And the inner world opened up and he watched Martin's memories begin to play once more:_

The crew had got used to being at the training center.

The time had passed easily for the first three months as they got used to learning all about the craft and studying for the mission.

In this time Vern had stayed close to Martin and their friendship had become strong.

_Adam searched through Martin's memories and drew out the facts he needed to know:_

This time had been easy on all of them – it had all been about learning on paper and via computer software.

For all of this time as Martin and Vern had become close friends as they worked together, Maritsa Ivanov had also worked hard but stayed distant from her colleagues as she devoted all her time - even when off duty - to studying for the mission.

Joey Avision had muddled his way through this part of the training, understanding the ropes but not being the best at grasping the more complicated scientific aspects. He had looked forward to the weekends when he could get home to his family.

And Nick Briggs the Commander's son had continued to aggressively carry his air of self importance as he carried on insisting he excelled at everything - even when his own father had pointed out to him that his progress was not _quite _satisfactory...

Adam shifted forward in time again, seeking out memories that Martin considered significant, and then he found the next one:

_The crew were working together on a training simulation._

As they sat in a reproduction of the main crew compartment Martin sat beside Vern and looked down at the array of controls in front of both of them.

"We can do this." He stated.

Vern smiled.

"I know that..."

And he gave a sly glance back at the others who were seated at the back of the compartment in the places they would be on the real flight – the only difference was there was a control panel beside each seat that was a replica of the panel on the flight controls.

"I'm really enjoying this part of the training." Vern said quietly to Martin, "You know how to fly this thing, I know how to program it –and it's _so_ satisfying to see Nick finish last every time!"

Martin smiled, thinking about how the part of this mission training that involved electronics and programming left Nick so confused. Vern was right; it was good to see Nick come last when he liked to boast about how he thought he was so much better than everyone else on the mission...

Then Commander Briggs spoke through the intercom:

"Okay, I'm still not happy with this – every one of you needs to know how to program the separation from the main craft and the co ordinates to get back to Earth. This is to ensure _everyone_ knows how to get home in case the unthinkable happens. You're on a count down from two minutes in twenty seconds time..."

"Sir?" Vern said, "Could I sit this one out? I'd like to give someone _else_ a chance to finish in less than sixty seconds..."

"No." Briggs stated, "I'm aware this side of the job is your speciality, but I need you all together for this, Dr Vernon."

And Vern glanced at Martin who looked down at the controls and stifled his laughter.

"I don't mind coming fourth." Joey said happily.

"And I'm sure I can do better than third place." Maritsa added.

Martin was still laughing.

He knew Nick was seething over this, but he said it anyway:

"I'm happy to come second-at least I'm not _last!_"

Nick said nothing as he sat in position and waited for the light to flash red, indicating the beginning of the simulation.

_And the light turned on._

Martin looked down at his own controls and programmed in the code for manual separation of the craft and then the co ordinates to guide the flight back to Earth.

He hit the enter option and sat back, then he glanced at Vern, who was looking pleased with his own efforts.

"I was through with this thing twenty one seconds ago," He stated proudly, "I think I just beat my own personal best!"

Martin glanced back:

Maritsa hit the enter key and frowned, clearly unhappy at not improving her speed.

"I'm just about done." Joey said as he ended the sequence, "I _never_ remember this stuff- but there's a way to cheat- I know there's two end of code sequences for water and for land- I try and aim for land if it's a regular emergency scenario and I'm assuming there's a runway available. But sometimes I wind up far from the target landing spot!"

"How far?" Martin wondered.

Joey smiled sheepishly.

"_According to the last simulation results, yesterday I landed us in the North Pole fourteen times." _

Nick gave a sigh of frustration as he finally hit the enter key and sat back.

"At least I got right." He stated, "Even _if_ it took me a while."

The lights turned up and the test ended.

Then Briggs spoke through the intercom again:

"Okay – that was a lot better for most of us even though we've done this almost five hundred times before: Vernon – 43.2 seconds, on target. Lee - 48.1, on target. Ivanov – 55 seconds exactly, on target. Avison- 59.1, you made it back to Earth. _But this time you landed in the middle of the Sahara desert_."

Then he paused before adding: "Officer Briggs- one minute and thirty seconds. _Target not recognized_."

As Nick gave a sigh and shook his head he looked down at the floor.

Then Commander Briggs spoke up again:

"Maritsa and Joey – dismissed for the rest of the day. Martin, I want you and Vern to stay and work for a couple more hours with Nick, he needs to put some practise in."

Vern's eyes grew wider as he looked towards the intercom.

"But I don't want to work overtime with him –"

"_That's all."_ Briggs stated, and the speaker system turned off.

Joey and Maritsa got up from their seats.

"I'm glad that's over with for the day!" The slender Russian woman said as she stretched and rubbed her stiff back, "I think those numbers will stay in my head for the rest of my life!"

Joey was smiling now.

"I made it back to Earth. That's good enough. It's not as if we'll ever have to do this for real- flying is Martin's job and programming is down to Vern. We just get to do the _fun_ stuff, Maritsa! I _love_ outer space; I just can't wait to get back up there!"

Maritsa smiled and glanced back at the simulated flight area.

"See you later, guys." She said.

And as she smiled Vern smiled back, but she looked away and then she was gone.

Joey checked his watch and his eyes lit up.

"Erin's just got the kids home from school - I'm going to call her!"

And as he hurried out of the room, Vern spoke again and kept his voice low.

"I don't want to work with him. _He hates me_." He said, gesturing towards the Commander's son who sat sulking in his seat at the back of the room.

"You _have_ to work with him." Martin said quietly, "Because Briggs won't kick his own son off the team now, no matter how many times he fails and no matter how obnoxious he is to the rest of us."

"That's depressingly true." Vern replied.

Martin got up from his seat and looked over at Nick.

"Come and sit next to Vern and watch him work the sequence in. You can do this, it just takes practise."

Nick got up and walked over to the fake control area and sat in Martin's seat.

"Okay, I'm watching you Vern." He said reluctantly.

Martin cut in, sensing too much hostility between the two of them.

"I know this is Vern's area of expertise but you have to know this stuff too. It could save your life, Nick."

And Nick Briggs gave a shrug.

"I'm watching." He said, "Let's get on with it..."

* * *

After working with Nick for almost two hours, Martin guessed he would not get any faster than he had already managed- his speed had picked up a little even if his co ordinates were way off target, at least he was reaching Earth this time...

"I think you can call it a day now, Nick." He told him, "You've improved. But I want you to work on this tomorrow. Take the whole morning and practise just like Vern showed you to. Then you can tell the Commander you've worked on the issue."

Nick got up from his seat.

"Thanks Martin." He said, turning his back on Vern, "So, what do you have planned for the weekend?"

Martin felt mildly surprised that the ice had finally broken with Nick.

"I don't know yet- we've got tomorrow off too so I might stay on the base Friday and go and see my sister on Saturday. It will be nice to get together with family."

Nick looked a little surprised.

"Your _sister?_ I would have thought you had a wife to go home to, Captain."

Martin smiled.

He had lost count of the times people had looked at him and assumed because of his strong build and his high command position that _had_ to be straight and he _had_ to have a wife...

_"I'm not married."_

Nick guessed again.

"But you've got a girlfriend?" And then he laughed. "Or maybe you've got _more_ than one girlfriend, right Martin? I'll bet you play around – so do I when I get the chance, I love women!"

Martin felt mildly amused by his assumptions.

"I don't have a girlfriend. _And I don't want one_."

And Nick laughed again.

"You don't want one?" He exclaimed, "What are you, _gay?_"

As he watched the conversation unfold, Vern's eyes grew wider as he wondered if Martin would forget his professional capacity for a split second and punch Nick – but he didn't do that. Instead, Martin looked Nick in the eye and spoke plainly:

"It's common knowledge among my colleagues that I have _no_ interest in women..." Martin replied, "And my priority right now is my work. I leave my personal life at home; I don't let _anything_ get in the way of doing my job because I've got responsibility for other peoples lives. I'm _always _aware of that when I'm working."

Then he leaned a little closer and spoke again:

"You say I'm gay like it's a bad thing, Nick."

Nick's eyes got wider.

"I wasn't starting a fight with you, Captain..."

Martin glared at him.

"I'll just share something with you: Actually its _not_ a bad thing at all - but I _wouldn't_ expect someone as _ignorant_ as you to understand that. And by the way, while I'm keeping my mind on the job I'm learning how to prepare for a potential emergency in space. And that's what you're supposed to be doing too. I've been concentrating on my job, so I know what to do if the worst happens_. I hope it never comes down to you to save us all because if it does God help us all - the only thing you seem to have been studying on this part of the course is the ass and cleavage of Maritsa Ivanov – at least when she's not looking._"

And Nick's face turned scarlet.

"I _don't_ stare at her..."

"You can go now." Martin stated.

Nick got up from his seat. He glanced back at Vern.

"Thanks for your help." He said coldly, "But it's only fair to warn you this is where your easy life ends. You won't be top of the class any more- it's _my_ turn now. It's crash simulation on Monday. _In other words, you're gone soon, Vern_."

Martin saw the startled look in Vern's eyes and he turned angrily to the Commander's son.

"He just helped you, Nick!"

Nick shrugged.

"He's still useless. He couldn't handle an emergency situation. He won't last five minutes in the crash simulator!"

"Crash simulator?" Vern said nervously, "Why? What's so bad about it?"

"It's a model of the crew cabin." Nick told him, "It's an escape practise and it will make you feel like you've just been slammed against a brick wall. And you _won't_ know when it's coming. It will just happen all of a sudden and you'll have to pick yourself up, strap yourself into your seat and separate from the main craft and plot landing co ordinates for earth. If there's a single mistake, the simulator drops down and floods with water as fast as air would run out if we had an oxygen fail on board the craft. And then we have to get out before we drown. And here's the best part_: If one of us screws up, we have to do it all over again_..."

Vern looked terrified.

"I didn't think it would be that bad..."

_Martin wanted to hit Nick. He wanted to hit him to shut him up but he held it back because he wasn't about to risk his place on the team over this_...

"If you have a problem with me, be man enough to say so! _Don't_ take it out on him!"

Nick avoided an answer to that remark as he looked hard at Martin.

"You've _never_ liked me because I speak my mind!"

"I don't like you because you have an _attitude problem!_" Martin said sharply, "You seem to think no one else is good enough to work with you!"

"You don't like me." He stated, "And if I had a say in selecting members of this team, I wouldn't be working with _any_ of you."

And he walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

Vern got up from his seat and looked nervously at Martin.

"How bad is this crash simulator?"

Martin put his hand on his shoulder.

"It's not easy and it's not comfortable but it's just a training module. You _can_ get through it."

Fear reflected in Vern's eyes.

"I still don't like the sound of it."

Martin thought about the weekend and guessed Vern could do with sometime away from this place.

"I'm going over to Jenny's house on Saturday. Come with me; I know Scott would love to catch up with you."

"Okay." Vern said quietly, "Sounds good..."

_But he still sounded scared._

Martin thought about Nick and started to wonder if hitting him was actually a better option than staying professional in this matter:

_He was protective towards Vern; he didn't want his friend to be scared by the things that Nick said..._

* * *

Adam paused the memory playback and opened his eyes, drawing in a deep breath and looking at the sunlit sky.

He understood now why humans were so complex; they could feel many emotions in rapid succession, love, sadness, anger...and something else, too – Adam had smiled and felt warm inside when he had felt Martin's amusement on remarking that being second on the timing exercise had been better than being last, Martin had found it funny to infuriate Nick...

He thought about the things that made Martin laugh, and he also thought about the nature of those around him who he had been close to when training for the mission.

The sun was sinking lower in the sky now but Adam didn't care if he stayed out here until it grew dark and cold:

He wanted to be inside Martin's memories and he was going back to see more. He activated the processor again and the inner world came back to life:

_It was the start of a long weekend off training..._

Martin woke up early to the sound of a car pulling up nearby.

He got out of bed and looked out of the window, then he stepped back a little, noticing by the nervous look on Joey's face as he parked that something was _definitely _going on...

He watched as Joey got out of the car.

Then he walked around to the back of it, glanced around to make sure the coast was clear and opened up the trunk.

As he helped his wife get out of it Martin put his hand to his mouth to stifle his laughter before he woke Vern in the next room:

_Joey had sneaked his wife onto the base without permission?_

He watched as the two of them briefly kissed and then Joey grabbed her by the hand and led her into his room and shut the door quickly.

Martin heard a bump as the two of them fell together on the bed and it knocked against the wall.

Then Erin Avison giggled and Joey's voice could be faintly heard through the wall:

"_I've missed you so much!"_ He said excitedly, _"This is great! We can do it in my bed, then my pillow will smell of you and I'll hug it every night while you're not with me..."_

Martin stepped away from the wall and left his room, heading for the shower.

He passed Vern's door and paused; the door was partly open and Vern was sleeping deeply, undisturbed by the thump that had sounded through the walls as Joey leapt onto the bed with his wife.

Martin wondered how he could sleep through that - and then he noticed the empty half bottle of vodka on the floor beside his bed.

He drew in a deep breath and crept into the room and picked up the bottle, then he left the room again and put the bottle in the bag he had packed ahead of going over to Jenny's for the weekend:

_Alcohol was banned from the base._

_If Briggs found out about this, Vern would be off the team..._

* * *

Adam opened his eyes and drew in a deep breath of fresh air; Martin's memory had been so strong he could almost feel the concern he had sensed for his friend carried through into here and now; it stayed within him and he turned and looked back at the house, the sky had grown dark and as he looked up he noticed the curtain moved slightly in Martin's room.

_He understood; it had grown late and the humans knew he had a task to perform and had left him alone to work on his memory processing, but now it had grown late and Martin was thinking of him and missing his closeness..._

Adam got up and walked towards the house, remembering that time had passed since these memories had played out in life and now Vern was dead and Martin was mourning his loss, so he decided he ought to remain silent about all he had witnessed so far.

Martin was still up and dressed when Adam walked through the door.

He noticed the way his dark eyes looked deeply into his own and got the strangest feeling that the more Adam learned about his memories, it seemed as if this man could see right into his soul.

Martin sat down on his bed and took off his watch.

He started to unbutton his shirt and then stopped, catching that look in Adam's eyes as he sat down beside him; he was still looking at him intently, almost as if he understood something no one else had ever reached: the pain of his loss, the pain he had carried since the day of the crash.

"What did you learn?" He said quietly.

"_I am still learning."_ Adam replied, putting his arm around his shoulder.

As Martin saw understanding as deep as space itself in the depths of his eyes, he gave a heavy sigh and rested his head on his shoulder.

Then the two men sat there facing the window that looked out to the blackness of night and the stars that punctured it.

"Tell me what you've come to understand." Martin said to him, "You're using my memories, I need to know."

"I understand that love can mean many things." Adam replied, "And that you had to fight hard for the one you cared about. And you..."

He thought about the vodka bottle and the thoughts he had caught running through Martin's mind as he hid the evidence of his drinking.

"You hated to do it but you did it for Vern, you bent the rules? You hid the evidence of the alcohol."

Martin's head was still on his shoulder and he smiled at the memory, recalling other memories that Adam was yet to experience from his time with the Solar Four team.

"I did a lot more than that." He stated, "I stepped _way_ out of line for that guy. And I don't regret it either, it was after the crash simulator. I hit Nick. I _really _hit him for what he did to Vern."

And on hearing those words, Adam's grip on his shoulder tightened as he leaned closer to him.

"I did not intend to talk about your friend tonight. I didn't want to cause you sadness."

"No," Martin told him honestly, "Remembering the old days doesn't cause me sadness, Adam. It's just the here and now that does that, it's knowing that I can't bring any of them back."

And Adam said nothing in reply as he sat beside him with his arm around him and thought about the memories he would access tomorrow; he was learning so much about this planet from this man's past that he was surprised at all he was uncovering.

But Martin's thoughts were on the crew of the Solar Four as he sat with Adam in silence and wondered if they still existed on some other kind of level.

The two men remained together, close and silent long into the night - _one thinking about a past that he could learn from while the other wondered about eternity..._


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The night had been a silent time for Adam and Martin, a time when much reflection had been done and then they had rested close together and slept until daybreak.

When Martin woke up he reached for Adam but found he was already up and dressed.

"What are you doing?" He wondered.

Adam was standing at the window and he was doing it again:

_He was watching the skies..._

Martin said his name again and this time Adam turned and looked at him.

_And there was something deep in the darkness of his eyes that caused a shiver run over Martin's flesh – he didn't know why but he had caught it there in his eyes, as if there was something this man from the stars did not wish to share with him..._

He wondered what it could be but then the moment was gone as the look in his eyes grew warm and he spoke with a soft and gentle voice that seemed to contrast so sharply with his muscular tattooed body.

"I've been thinking about the significance of the act of violence." He stated.

And Martin ran his fingers through his hair and stretched as he sat up and looked at him in confusion.

"What act of violence?"

"You hit Nick." He reminded him," I wish to find out more about that, about your motivation. I'm also aware that you are a man with a long military career, you choose to serve your country in the realm of defence - yet you have a peaceful outlook in this role, you are not a man who would want to embrace war. This seems to be a great contradiction."

Martin smiled.

"I believe the military's role should first and foremost be that of peacekeeper and defender." He told him, "But peacekeeper first and foremost - war should always be a last resort. That's my view but in my line of work, orders have to be obeyed and I wouldn't have chosen my career if I didn't agree with that part. And I hit Nick because he did something dumb and almost killed Vern. I was _very_ angry. I didn't even care if I lost my place on the team over it; I just wanted to hit him, so I did it."

"This outlet for your anger resolved the issue?"

Martin shook his head.

"No, but it felt good at the time," He explained, "Nick deserved it."

Adam thought about all he had earned from previous teachings that had remained intact about Earth back on his home planet.

"Historically it would suggest that humans are violent and have a strong tendency towards conflict." He stated, "But on a closer look it seems that most are peaceful, or would certainly _prefer_ to live in peace."

"That sounds about right." Martin told him, "This world is _not _a bad place. Some of the people in it have been bad, there are still bad people around – but the majority of them are good and that reflects on the earth as a whole. This is a beautiful planet. It's even more beautiful to see from outer space. _And I'll never forget that four people are gone from this world who should still be here- the world would have been better off if they'd lived, because they were all good people_."

Adam looked at the skies thoughtfully.

"There's a great deal of truth in that statement." He replied, looking back to him and fixing him with a dark gaze, "And wisdom too. I think you have more wisdom than you realise, Martin."

And Martin smiled as his eyes sparkled.

"I can be full of surprises..."

Adam recognized the playful look in his eyes that were as blue as the skies of the Earth, but as he thought about those skies his heart grew heavy and he remembered his task had to be completed because he had very little time left here on this planet, and exactly _why _was something that pained him to think of and it hurt even deeper as he considered telling Martin the truth:

_Not yet. He saw no point in sharing such news because no good could come of it..._

"I must work." He said quietly, taking a chair from where it was placed up against the wall next to a small table and placing it by the open windows.

"Can I stay?" Martin wondered.

He looked back at him and smiled apologetically.

"I would not see or hear you while I am accessing an inner view. But I think later we should go out because I very much want to see a glimpse of your world. It's important to me –not only for my research but for myself. I need to know more of Earth."

Martin knew his sister would raise objections but he agreed; if it made Adam happy he wanted to allow him that because time was short.

"We'll do that." He told him. Then he got out of bed and headed for the shower, glancing back just in time to see Adam touch the disk on his fingertip to the tattoo that opened up the copy of his memories.

* * *

He sat facing the window, absorbed in the inner world once more.

Adam traced the map of Martin's memories of the events leading up to the confrontation with Nick:

_The scene opened in a wide, comfortable living area where there was a large TV and three large sofas. Across the room was a dining table and this was the place where the team relaxed together when they were not training._

And then Martin glanced around:

Nick was sitting on the end of the sofa by the door that led outside. He was looking at the TV screen even though it was off and lost in his own thoughts.

Maritsa was on the other sofa next to Vern, who was trying to talk to her and keep her interested, although his efforts to keeping her interested resorted to explaining how he had helped design the heat shields for the Solar Four, and she kept looking away as she listened to Joey start to speak.

Joey was sitting on the floor on a big soft bean bag and his wife was next to him – everyone had thought it amusing that Joey had sneaked her in for the night, but she had explained that her parents had the kids that day so there was no reason why she couldn't come over- apparently, Joey was in the habit of sneaking Erin into the places he stayed whilst training.

"So yeah, Mars was a cool place. It was exciting to walk on the surface. I took soil samples and everything. That was fun." He stated.

Then Nick spoke up, wondering exactly what Mars had been like to visit.

"So you've been to Mars twice?"

Joey looked at him and smiled.

"_Yes."_

"What's it like?" He wondered.

Joey's eyes sparkled.

"_It's a cool place."_

And Nick gave a sigh of frustration, wishing Joey would go a little deeper instead of light responses or even worse, one word answers, which he seemed to be fond of giving when in conversation socially.

"But what's it _like?_"

Joey thought about it.

"_Sandy."_

"But what's the _landscape_ like, that's what I mean..."

Joey thought some more.

"When I got home I got some of the kids play sand and I put it on a tray and I recreated the surface of Mars!"

That remark surprised Nick.

"So what did _that_ look like?"

Joey smiled.

"_Sand."_ He stated.

And then he carried on looking at Nick and smiled, waiting for the next question.

Nick put his hand to his head and briefly squeezed his temples as if conversation with Joey was starting to give him a headache.

"I'm going to bed." He announced, then he got up and left the room.

As the door closed Erin pulled a bottle out from under the beanbag and giggled.

"He's gone!" Joey exclaimed, "Great! Who wants some vodka and orange? We sneaked it in this morning!"

Vern's eyes lit up.

"I'll _definitely_ have some!"

"I'll have one too." Maritsa said.

Vern had already dashed over to the table, keen to grab some drinking glasses.

"Martin?" He said, "Are you in too?"

And Martin gave a sigh; he hadn't spoken to Vern about finding the bottle in his room and now didn't seem like the best time to mention it.

"No, maybe later..."

Then he looked at Joey.

"You were waiting for Nick to leave before you pulled the booze out?"

"You bet I was!" He exclaimed, "You can't trust that little brat – if he knew about this he'd go running straight to Daddy!"

* * *

Two hours later the conversation was getting more relaxed as the team shared the drinks.

"How much vodka did you put in this?" Maritsa wondered.

"A whole bottle!" Erin replied, "Joey wanted to do something special with everyone tonight."

"Everyone except Nick!" Vern exclaimed, and he shifted closer on the sofa to Maritsa and as he moved he draped his arm across the back of the seat.

"I really like you." He said quietly, "I just wanted to say that."

Maritsa smiled.

"I like you too. I'm looking forward to the mission; I think you will be a fine member of the team."

And Vern smiled back at her and was about to speak again, but she had got up and walked over to Erin and the two women began to share a conversation.

Martin was sitting closer to the group now and Vern got up and sat beside him.

"I tried." He said, "But she just doesn't seem to notice me."

"You're not being direct enough." Martin replied, "Just tell her you like her."

"_I did!"_

Then Vern's attention was grabbed by Maritsa again as she looked at Erin and asked her a question:

"_What's a sticky-on?"_

Erin laughed and so did Joey.

"It's a very silly game I used to play when I was a kid. I played it with my kids and Erin had to clean up the mess!"

Erin playfully slapped his arm.

"Next time _you_ can knock 'em off the ceiling with the broom handle!"

"But what is it?" Maritsa wondered.

Martin sipped his drink and laughed too; eventually he had given in and agreed to one glass and now he was on his second and the booze was almost gone now.

"I know what it is...it's a wet toilet paper game!"

Maritsa stared at Joey.

"Toilet paper?"

As Joey and Erin laughed so did Vern.

"This sounds like a stupid game I want play!" He said as he laughed.

Martin noticed Vern seemed to have had much more booze than the others – or maybe it was just that the previous night's drinks were still in his bloodstream.

Erin laughed and shook her head.

"I think I know where _this_ is going..."

Joey jumped up from the bean bag.

"_Let's do it!"_ He said excitedly.

* * *

Ten minutes later, they were all in Martin and Vern's shared living quarters.

Maritsa stood by the bathroom door and smiled as she shook her head.

"I don't believe they are doing this!"

And she looked at Martin and he tried not to smile but as another lump of wet toilet paper hit the ceiling with a _thump_ and a _splat,_ he started to laugh.

"It's better," Vern announced as he lay on his back on the bathroom floor, "If you do it lying down. You can get a better aim..."

There was another splat as more of it hit the ceiling.

Then another lump went sailing past and hit the ceiling next to the light and stuck fast.

"I win!" Joey yelled, "I got closest to the target!"

Erin giggled.

"I think you should start cleaning this up!" She reminded him.

Joey grabbed more toilet paper off the spool and ran it under the tap as he smiled.

"I've only just got started. I can get closer than that...I can get right above the light..."

Vern laughed even harder.

"How come you can hit the target with a sticky on but you can't land the shuttle at Mission Control in a simulation? You wound up in the _Sahara?_ You were _way_ off the mark!"

Joey spun around and playfully threw the wet toilet paper and hit Vern in the face.

Vern grabbed it.

"That's coming right back at you!"

And he threw it.

As it hit Maritsa she grabbed another lump of wet paper beside the sink and threw it back and it missed and hit Joey.

Martin was laughing as a play fight erupted and suddenly all he could see was wet toilet paper bombs hitting the walls, the mirror and Joey and Maritsa.

Then Maritsa turned to Vern and saw he was unsteady as he struggled to get up off the wet floor.

She held out her hand and helped him to stand and as he got up and looked into her eyes and smiled, he suddenly felt much bolder in his efforts to impress her.

_"Wanna see my tattoo?"_

She laughed.

"Okay..."

Vern turned around and started to unbutton his jeans.

_"Oh my God!"_ Erin shrieked, and then she giggled as Vern stood with is back to them all as he prepared to drop his pants, _"What's he doing?"_

Joey gave no reply as Martin picked up the last remaining lump of wet toilet paper from the floor and threw it, hitting him on the shoulder.

Then Joey laughed.

"You're getting it back, Martin!"

And Vern pulled down his underwear, showing off his ass and scrolled writing on the right side of it that stated in large lettering:

_Born To Party._

And Joey threw the wet toilet paper.

It sailed past Martin and hit the man standing side him; it hit him square in the face with a _splat._

Then the room fell silent, save for another _splat _as a furious Commander Briggs grabbed the wet paper, dragged it from his reddened face and hurled it to the floor.

"_WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?"_ He yelled, seeing toilet paper stuck all over the walls and ceiling and the members of the Solar Four team standing there in the wet bathroom.

Vern gave a gasp on hearing the Commander's voice and turned around sharply.

"Sorry Sir-"

Then he realised his pants were still down and he quickly put his hands over his groin as Maritsa giggled quietly.

_Then Briggs spoke again and no one laughed._

"I heard there was noise going on...I'm glad I came to see what was wrong!"

And he looked at Joey.

"Avison, go back to your room and take your wife with you! I'll overlook this because you're not working today but next time, she needs a pass to come in. Take her _home_ in the morning!"

Then as they left the room he glared at the rest of them.

Maritsa looked at Briggs apologetically.

"I apologise, Sir."

_"Get out of here!"_ He snapped.

She lingered as she looked back at Martin and Vern.

"But Sir this was just a foolish act that happened and –"

"OUT!"

Brigg's voice echoed around the bathroom and Maritsa followed his order, pausing first to glance back at Vern, but Vern hadn't noticed as he pulled up his underwear and then his jeans and quickly tidied up his clothing.

The Commander stepped closer and looked at Martin and then Vern.

"I've been led to believe this stupidity happened because of _you,_ Dr Vernon!" He said sharply.

"And I bet I know _who_ blamed me." Vern replied, but the Commander looked so furious he fell silent after that remark.

Then he looked to Martin.

"_You could have put a stop to this!"_

"Sir, we were all off duty."

Briggs looked around the bathroom again.

"Clean this mess up." He stated, "And I'm aware there was alcohol involved, I can smell it."

_Now he was looking right at Vern._

"I'm not surprised Dr Vernon but I _am_ disappointed. If this happens again you're off the team!"

Vern stared at him.

"_But I didn't –"_

"We'll clean the mess up Sir." Martin said, "And we are both extremely sorry. This will never happen again."

The Commander still looked furious.

"_Clean it up right now!"_ He said sharply, and then he left the room.

As the door of their living quarters closed, Martin breathed a sigh of relief.

"Well that wasn't so bad. We got away with it."

"Got away with it?" Vern exclaimed, "I just got the blame for _everything!_ And it's all down to his little shit of a son! I bet he heard us through the wall and got straight on the phone to his father!"

Martin shrugged it off.

"Let it go." He said to him, "No one's off the team, just forget about it."

And then they began to clear up the mess together.

* * *

Adam smiled as he drew back from the memory; it had been amusing to see the humans play and feel almost like they were children once more... he thought of Martin's involvement and he felt warm in his heart. He knew if he said _sticky ons_ to Martin that was a memory that would make him smile...

The breeze was blowing through the open window and taking in the fresh air helped him to drift back to the memories without switching the controls that swirled within his moving tattoos.

_The next night saw Martin and Vern at Jenny's house._

They were out in the garden on a warm evening and the skies were growing darker.

"I found the vodka bottle you sneaked in." Martin said to him as they sat together at the bench.

Vern glanced over at Jenny and Scott who were sitting on the lawn with some neighbours who had come over a few drinks and he kept his voice low.

"I wondered where it went."

Martin looked into his eyes.

"Is there a problem? _Because there's no booze in space, Vern_."

His friend gave a tired sigh.

"There's booze in this house right now and I'd be drinking it if there was a problem. No there isn't one, okay? I just need to take the pressure off sometimes. It's not easy for me; I'm not used to this kind of training. It's difficult and I need a drink sometimes, that's all there is to it."

Then worry clouded his eyes.

"Is this crash simulation going to be as bad as Nick said?"

"Nick hates you and you hate Nick." Martin reminded him, "Don't listen to anything he says. Yes it _is _difficult and you won't find it easy but I'll be right beside you."

And Martin reached across the table and closed his hand over Vern's and gave a squeeze.

"You'll get through it, trust me..."

Vern clung to those words as he thought about the tough days that lie ahead.

"Thanks Martin, I _do_ trust you. And if you say I can get through it I know you're right."

And Martin had smiled but as he looked at Vern he had silently hoped that he _was_ right – _the crash simulation was the toughest part of training and he knew any civilian going through it would find it to be hell on earth..._

* * *

Adam drew back from the memory again.

As he sat in Martin's room he got the feeling that downstairs Jenny and Martin were discussing his absence and Martin was explaining that he was busy studying the memories.

He briefly wondered if Martin had shared with Jenny the fact that they had grown closer.

Then he pushed those thoughts aside as he found the memory he was searching for:

It swirled with so many emotions he had to take a deep breath to slide it back to the start and enter into it.

There was so much that had happened: love, hatred, anger – and something _else_, something that he had not encountered before...

Adam began to play the memory to find out what it was:

_It was the start of the crash simulation training._

All the crew were in uniform but minus the heavy space suits. They were sat in a replica of the flight cabin that had to be accessed by climbing an outer ladder and then stepping over the open top and going down a second ladder. The capsule was on a raised platform that was high in the air and powerful hydraulics held it suspended, ready to drop until the base hit a connection in the ground far below that was capable of pumping water into the capsule.

Martin was sat beside Vern and the others were all in position too.

"So what do we do?" Vern said nervously.

Martin noticed his hand was shaking and he reached over and gave it a squeeze.

"We wait. We don't know when this thing will start. That's the whole point of it..."

Behind them, Nick was sitting in silence, tensed and ready for the jarring that would shake his bones, ready for anything and knowing every step of this procedure because he had done similar before and knew what to expect.

Maritsa thought about all she had to remember and then she looked over to the pilot's area and noticed Captain Lee was speaking quietly to Vern.

"_...and it's nothing to be scared of."_ Martin was saying quietly.

Maritsa felt a sudden wave of concern for Dr Vernon and she spoke up.

"Vern? Are you okay?"

"I threw up twice before I got in this thing." He admitted, "I'm scared."

Joey took a deep breath.

"_Focus!"_ He told himself, _"Impact, belt on, check co ordinates..."_

Then he smiled.

"Hey Vern," He said, "This is kind of scary but it's fun, know what I mean? It's fun if you like rollercoasters and stuff like that..."

Vern was shaking.

"I hate rollercoasters." He said quietly, "They make me throw up too!"

Nick glared at him.

_"If you puke and screw up this test for the rest of us, I'll rub your face in it!"_

Vern turned around in his seat and looked at him.

"You got us all in the shit with your father! _Everyone_ knows it was you!"

Nick rolled his eyes.

"_Go play with some toilet paper, Vern."_

As he stood up, Martin caught his arm.

"You might want to sit down –"

"No, I want to tell that asshole what I think of him for running to his Daddy!"

Anger fired up in Nick's eyes.

"Calling me names, loser?"

Vern looked at him with anger blazing in his own eyes.

"I got blamed because you dropped _my name_ to your father! Everyone knows it was you – _we all do!_ "

And Nick suddenly felt uncomfortable as the rest of the team glared at him. He looked down at the floor and waited for the test to begin.

"Sit down." Martin said again.

Vern was still looking over at Nick.

"I haven't finished-"

"_Sit!"_

Then the capsule jolted violently and the crew members were jarred sharply in their seats, all except for Vern, who was thrown to the floor by the force of the movement.

He picked himself up feeling like every bone in his body hurt, then sat down in his seat and began to program the flight co-ordinates.

Then he hit the button to indicate he was finished.

Martin also hit his button.

Then Maritsa and Joey and Nick indicated they were finished.

_They waited._

Then Briggs spoke up:

"Lee – Pass. Ivanov – Pass. Avison – Pass. Briggs – Pass. Vernon – Fail, you forgot your belt. _Let's do this thing again_."

They all unbuckled their seatbelts and got up, heading for the ladder.

"_Hurry up."_ Martin said as Vern got up from his seat.

There was a sound of rushing water and Maritsa was out first, then Joey. Martin turned back as the water reached waist level to see Vern looking panicked as the compartment started to flood.

He reached for him and Briggs spoke again:

"Get out, Captain Lee- he has to do this by himself!"

Martin headed for the ladder, just in time to see Nick swim through the rising water and come up behind Vern.

"You screwed up!" He said sharply, "Simulation results? You just got us all _killed,_ asshole!"

And he smacked him sharply across the back of his head, sending him off balance.

Nick made his way to the ladder while Vern splashed and struggled in the rising water.

"_Get me out!"_ He yelled in panic.

On the other side of the capsule, the others stood there dripping wet as Vern yelled for help.

"Sir I can go and get him." Martin offered.

The water stopped rushing.

"I turned it off." Briggs replied, then he spoke sharply through the intercom:

"_Get out of the god damned water, Doctor Vernon!"_

Then Martin heard Briggs yell his name and tell him to get off the ladder, but he climbed to the top and looked inside.

Vern looked up at him, pale and shaking and soaking wet.

Martin held his hand out and Vern grabbed it.

"Come on." Martin said, "Get out, we have to start again..."

As he climbed back down to the outside and Vern slowly followed Nick spoke up again.

"That's right Vern...you get to do this _all over again_..."

But the smile was wiped off his face by the frosty look Maritsa shot him.

As he stepped back onto the ground Vern was unsteady. He looked like he was in a state of shock as he ran his fingers through his wet hair.

"_I'm sorry I screwed up."_ He said quietly.

Joey looked at him and smiled brightly.

"That's okay!" He said enthusiastically as he gave his wet hair a shake and sent droplets flying everywhere much to Nick's annoyance, "I _love _this part of the training, it's the best part!"

Then the capsule began to drain, ready to start the exercise again.

* * *

The crew were silent as they got back into the capsule and took position a second time.

Martin kept his voice low as he spoke to his friend.

"Remember, like I said – put your belt on _first_. Then you put the numbers in, okay?"

Vern nodded.

Martin noticed he was still shaking but remained silent, hoping that he would pass this time, because he didn't think the scientist could take much more of this punishment.

Then Vern gave a quiet sob.

Nick spoke up.

"Are you _crying_, Vern?" He said spitefully, "There's only one _girl _on this mission and she passed first time, you useless waste of space!"

"_I heard that."_ Said the Commander, and Nick fell silent again.

Martin tensed as he sat in his seat – not because he was waiting for the crash simulation to start, but because he knew how close he was to getting up and punching Nick...but he knew if he did that the whole test would fail and Vern would have to go through it a third time, so he sat there and waited for the test to begin.

"Let's do it right this time." Nick added, "I hope _I_ don't make a mistake- otherwise you'll have to do it _three_ times, Vern."

Maritsa glanced at Nick and the look in her eyes was colder and harder than the depths of permafrost in the middle of a Russian winter.

"_Bastard."_ She said under her breath.

Then the capsule dropped and shifted sharply, jarring the people inside it.

"_Belt."_ Martin said quietly.

But he didn't have to tell him twice.

Vern's hands moved quickly as he grabbed his belt and put it on, then he keyed in the number sequence on the panel and hit _enter._

Martin noticed Vern was sweating heavily now.

"I did it right this time." He said breathlessly.

Then Briggs spoke up.

"Everyone passed."

And Vern gave a sigh of relief.

"Except _you,_ Dr Vernon." He added, "You programmed the numbers too fast-you missed a digit. _Fail_. "

And as the rush of water started to fill the cabin, Martin released his own belt pausing to briefly touch Vern's shoulder as he got up.

"Hurry up, get out."

Vern looked back at Martin, who was heading for the ladder. Joey had made it out first this time, Maritsa had followed and now Martin was on his way out too. Vern unlocked his belt and struggled through the rushing water, feeling panicked again as it rose quickly up the sides of the capsule.

Nick Briggs reached the ladder before him.

The water was still rushing and Vern reached for the ladder. Nick shoved him out of the way and Vern went under, coming up sharply as he coughed and gasped for air as the water continued to rush in.

"_Get out of my way!"_ Nick yelled, shoving him again as he reached for the ladder, then he was up and climbing and the water was almost up to the top and Vern reached out and finally grasped the ladder.

As the water continued to rush he clung to the ladder with his eyes closed.

"_I can't do this!"_ He shouted out.

Martin saw nothing through the small observation window but swirling water inside the capsule, then he gave a sigh of relief as Briggs turned the water off.

"Vern?" Martin called out, "Are you okay?"

There was a pause. The he heard a shaky reply from inside the half submerged capsule:

"Give me a minute... I can get out..."

And Maritsa turned to Martin.

"Does he really need to be put through this? He's a civilian."

"But he's on the mission like the rest of us." Martin replied, "I hate watching him go though this too but there's no other way - it's safety training."

Joey gave a sigh.

"I feel sorry for the guy too – and Nick is acting like a real jerk..."

"_I've had just about enough of him."_ Martin said quietly_, "I don't care if he's the Commander's son, I've had enough."_

Then the sound of rushing water cut through the air.

Martin looked sharply towards the capsule as the water continued to flood in.

"_Vern!" _He shouted, but there was no reply and as he looked through the observation window he saw the water cloud red.

As Martin dashed over to help, he saw Nick standing nearby. A look of alarm filled his eyes as he saw the blood in the water.

Martin grabbed the switch and turned off the water, then used the emergency manual control again to hit the _Drain_ button.

From the control center above, the Commander rushed out and gripped the rail tightly as he saw the emergency unfolding.

_"Get some medics down there!"_ He said urgently to one of his colleagues.

Martin was up the ladder and over the side, jumping into the water because he knew there was no time to waste.

He dragged in a deep breath and dived, grabbing hold of Vern and pulling him to the surface.

As he hauled him back up the ladder his friend was motionless and unresponsive as a deep bruise showed livid on his temple and blood ran from a small cut above it.

Martin got him back down the other side and laid him on the floor, turning him on his side.

And Vern coughed and water spilled out of his mouth and he gasped for air, opening his eyes and struggling.

Martin held him down as he came to his senses.

"It's okay, you got out..."

"_I can't...can't breathe!"_

His hand shook as he grabbed the oxygen from the medic who was now at his side and started to inhale deeply.

Briggs was watching the scene unfold from the ground now and he walked over to Martin, pausing to glance back at Vern feeling relieved he was breathing and well enough to complain about how he was feeling.

"How the hell did the manual switch turn on?" He demanded.

Martin caught the look in Nick's eyes – _the young guy looked scared now; it had just occurred to him that his dumb prank had almost killed Vern..._

"I'll tell you what happened, Sir." Martin said as he held his anger back just a little while longer, "We all got out. Vern was struggling. Nick turned the water back on to scare him and Vern slipped and knocked himself out and almost drowned, _that's_ what happened!"

The Commander turned to his son, who blinked back tears.

"It was a joke!" He protested.

"_You're off the team."_ His father stated.

Nick stared at his Dad.

"You can't do this to me, I'm your _son_ –"

"_YOU'RE OUT OF HERE!"_ Briggs yelled, _"SO GET THE HELL OUT OF MY SIGHT!"_

Nick turned away as tears blurred his eyes.

Martin watched as Briggs talked to the medics and then spoke to Vern, who was still clinging to the oxygen as he tried to breathe.

"Vern," He said, suddenly sounding a lot less commanding and much more kindly, "You have to go to the hospital to get checked over. But you're _not _off the team, okay?"

Vern barely opened his eyes as he nodded and gripped the oxygen mask harder as he dragged in more air.

Now he knew Vern would be okay Martin turned away and headed for the door, because he wasn't about to let Nick get away with what he'd done...

* * *

Nick was walking down the long corridor with his head down as he made his way towards the exit.

"_Hey!"_ Martin shouted, but Nick kept walking.

Martin picked his pace up, gaining on him fast.

"HEY BRIGGS!" He yelled.

He reached out and grabbed him by the shoulder, spinning him around as he slammed him against the wall.

Martin's eyes were blazing as he grabbed the Commander's son by his collar.

"You could have killed Vern, don't you realize that?"

"It was a joke!" Nick protested, "A lousy joke, I didn't mean for him to get hurt!"

Martin let go of him and took in a deep breath.

"Next time you have a problem don't take it out on Vern or any of the crew." He said in a low voice, "Next time you have a problem don't talk to me about it, either - _talk to the hand_."

"The hand?" Nick wondered, "What hand?"

"_This one."_

And Martins hand moved like a blur, dealing him a sharp, brutal slap as the back of his hand connected with Nick's face.

Nick staggered back with his hands covering his face as blood poured from his nose.

"You _hit_ me!" He said tearfully.

Martin was still furious and it showed; his eyes were blazing.

"_And I'll hit you again if you ever pull another stunt like that!"_ He yelled.

Nick was still crying as he wiped more blood from his nose.

"I'm off the team." He said tearfully "So I'm gone any way..."

And he turned and walked away, still holding one hand to his face.

Nick reached the door and opened it, then punched it in anger and it was still swinging long after he had passed through it.

Martin stood alone in the corridor and took a deep breath as he tried to cool off the anger that was still inside him:

_He wasn't proud of the fact that he had just hit Nick, but the guy had deserved it..._

* * *

Adam paused the time frame, thinking about Martin's reasons for hitting Nick. He had felt Martin's fear when he had dragged Vern from the water; for a moment he had wondered if his friend was dead because of what Nick had done...

But he was still thinking about the _other_ emotion he had sensed linked to this situation, it came later and he searched through what happened next to find it because he wanted to understand what it was:

_He found the memory he was looking for, it was the day after Vern had almost drowned:_

The rest of the crew had not trained without Vern. They had the day off and Martin was feeling anxious about his friend. He was sitting in the communal living area on a sofa and Joey was talking to Maritsa about Vern.

"It's quiet without him." He remarked, "I hope he's okay. I hope he's not gone too long."

Maritsa nodded.

Then she thought about Nick and her eyes hardened.

"I'm glad Briggs fired that little bastard. It makes no difference he is his son; he does not serve to be on this mission. He should have kicked him out a long time ago."

Martin's thoughts were still on Vern. He felt an ache in his heart as he thought about his friend.

"I hope he comes back soon. But he's had it so rough these last few days I wouldn't blame him if he _did_ quit after everything Nick did to him."

Maritsa's eyes clouded with sadness.

"I have been thinking about him a lot. I like him."

Joey smiled.

"And I think he likes you too." He said quietly, "He's _always _saying how much he likes you."

"I would be very sad if he didn't come back. I miss Vern." She stated.

"_You don't have to miss me. I couldn't stay away!"_

On hearing Vern's voice, the three of them looked up.

Vern walked through the doorway with a big smile on his face. There was a dressing over the cut to his head and he had some bruising but even if he was aching all over from what he had been through, he didn't show it.

"_I'm back!"_ He said brightly.

And Martin blinked away tears as he got up and hugged his best friend.

Then Joey hugged the pair of them and Vern laughed.

"Let go of me, guys! I'm covered in bruises!"

As they both let go of him, Maritsa stepped forward and Vern felt surprised to see her looking at him with such warmth.

"Hi." He said quietly, "It's good to see you again, Maritsa."

And she smiled as her eyes shone with joy.

"It's good to see you too, Vern. Very good." She told him, and as she stepped closer and wrapped her arms around him, she kissed his cheek.

Joey and Martin exchanged a surprised glance; something was happening here and they hadn't seen it coming...

"If you want to give me another kiss I'm perfectly happy for you to do that." Vern said as his gaze locked with hers.

And Maritsa smiled back at him.

"Maybe later." She confided, "After you pass the crash simulator test. I think you can do it."

There was a flicker of fear in his eyes at the thought of the simulator, but he nodded.

"I think I can do it too." He told her.

Then Briggs came into the room.

"Its good to have you back, Vern" He told him, "And you don't have to think about working on the simulator for a couple more days. I want you to have some time to get over what happened."

And he looked into his eyes.

"I'm very sorry my son did something so irresponsible. And if it makes you feel any better about it, he feels terrible about what happened. But he's off the team now. He's packing his stuff and leaving today."

And Vern nodded, but Martin caught a flicker of something he didn't quite understand in is eyes - it was almost as if Vern was _sorry _to hear about Nick losing his place on the team?

As Briggs left the room Martin looked at Vern.

"I thought you'd be happy to know he's going."

Vern frowned as he thought about everything.

"I don't like the little jerk." He admitted, "But I _don't_ think he should lose his place on the team- he wants this as much as the rest of us."

Maritsa and Joey looked at each other in surprise.

Martin followed as Vern headed for the door.

"Where are you going?" He asked him.

_"I just want to speak to the guy."_

* * *

They were outside now and heading towards the parking area where Nick was loading his bags into his car.

Martin grabbed Vern's arm and pulled him back.

"Are you sure you haven't still got a concussion? _That guy hates you!_"

"And I didn't exactly try and make peace with him; I was just as bad as he was." Vern said, "And I want to see what he's got to say for himself."

Martin gave a sigh as he watched Vern walk over to Nick's car.

He thought about everything Vern had just said – Martin knew for sure he was still angry with Nick over turning on the water, but Vern didn't see it that way. He knew how much the mission meant to everyone training for it and he didn't want to see anyone lose their place on the team – even a guy like Nick...

As Vern began to speak to him, Martin walked over to his side, aware that he had only just got over a mild concussion and he didn't want his friend to get into another fight.

But all thoughts of a possible fight melted away as he watched the conversation unfold:

"I thought you'd be happy I'm leaving." Nick said.

Vern looked at him and noticed how tearful the Commander's son was.

"I'm not happy about anyone losing their place on this team." He said honestly, "And I know we don't get along but it doesn't mean I want you off the team."

Nick looked down at the ground as he blinked away tears.

"_Thanks."_ He said quietly.

Vern stepped closer and held out his hand.

"You don't have to be my best buddy but can we agree to stop fighting? Because if we can, I want to speak to your Dad about his decision."

Nick took in a sharp breath and nodded, briefly shaking his hand as he avoided his gaze.

"Don't go any where." Vern told him, "I'm going to speak to the Commander right now."

And he turned and walked towards the main building and Martin walked with him.

"I don't know if I should call you crazy, or have the deepest admiration for you." Martin admitted, "I couldn't have done that. I would have had the little bastard thrown out on his ass."

_Vern glanced at Martin and smiled - and at that moment Martin was sure he had never felt more love in his heart for his closest friend._

"Life's too short to hate anyone." Vern told him, "I don't hold grudges. I thought I hated Nick but when it came down to it, I _didn't_ want him to lose his place on the mission, I really mean that. Let's go and find Briggs and see if I can change his mind..."

* * *

As the scene faded and Adam closed down the memories once more, he thought about how Martin had been surprised at Vern's decision – at first surprised and then he had felt immense admiration for him that had deepened his love for this man.

Martin had admired a quality in Vern and Adam searched for the name of it.

Then he found it:

_Forgiveness._

He was sure that Nick had wanted to apologize to Vern too and he had wanted to do that intensely, far more than it showed- but Nick had not been able to do that because he simply did not know how to show his feelings.

Adam took in a deep breath of air and closed the windows, then he went downstairs to look for Martin.

He found him in the kitchen talking to Jenny and remembering all he had witnessed, he walked up to Martin and embraced him tightly.

"I understand the love you had for Vern." He stated as he held him, "And I wish to comfort you. That wish comes from within my heart – _because I love you, Martin_."

And as Martin looked into his eyes with a surprised expression on his face, Adam leaned in and kissed him gently.

"I love you." He stated again.

And Jenny Hayden stared at her brother who was being embraced by a man from the stars:

_They had fallen in love? _

_Did Martin understand what this would mean for him, that soon the time would come for Adam to leave this world and never return?_


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Martin's gaze was locked on Adam as he held onto him and the two of them stood in silence, then Martin reached up and gently took hold of Adam's arms and held on gently as he lowered them, then stepped back from his embrace.

"That's a very profound thing to say." He told him.

"_I know." _Replied Adam.

Martin looked into his dark eyes and saw sincerity there, warmth and gentleness too – and deepest understanding.

He knew he was telling the truth and in a strange kind of way it came as no surprise; _what better way to fall in love with a person than accessing their memories, getting to know them from the inside out?_

Jenny felt as if she was standing in the way as she watched the scene unfold:

_She wanted to be happy for her brother but her thoughts had shifted back to her own man from the stars as she recalled the pain she had felt in her heart when the time had come to say goodbye..._

"You do know Adam has to leave in a few days, Martin?"

Her brother looked at her and nodded.

He saw sadness in Jenny's eyes for a moment, but then it was gone and she smiled.

"I guess you should make the most of the time you have left together."

"Good idea." Martin said quickly, picking up Jenny's car keys, "I think I'll take Adam for a drive."

Jenny's eyes grew wider.

"He's much safer stopping here, Martin!"

"Don't worry, he's safe with me." He replied, then he walked out the door and Adam followed.

* * *

Martin kept his eyes on the road as they drove away from the house.

He was silent too and Adam understood; it was because of what Jenny had said, he was thinking about the time coming when they would have to say goodbye...

"_I wish I could stay."_ Adam told him.

Martin was still watching the road ahead, blinking as he held back his tears.

"I wish you could stay too." He said quietly.

Then Adam sat back and relaxed as the world passed by. They had not neared the town yet, out here the road was wide and empty and the sides of it were tree lined and he could see fields for miles around.

_"I'm thinking about all that we shared."_ Adam remarked.

Martin glanced at him and Adam smiled as his dark eyes sparkled.

Seeing that look in his eyes made Martin smile too.

"Want to go for a walk?" He asked him.

Adam smiled again, and Martin needed no more encouragement to pull him out of his sombre mood.

They turned off the road and went up a dirt track, where they turned into a clearing and parked the car.

Now all around them was silent save for the breeze as it passed through the heavy boughs of the trees that shaded them.

Martin got out first and Adam followed.

"It's peaceful." Adam stated as he looked around, "And beautiful."

And then he fell silent, lost in thoughts he did not care to share as his eyes wandered again to the flawless blue skies above.

Martin stopped behind him and slid his arms around him, kissing him gently on the side of his neck.

"_I didn't bring you here for the peace and quiet."_ He whispered.

The heat of his breath on his skin seemed to feel as if it had just made every nerve in Adam's body come alive; he knew he was aching and he knew where, too – so he took Martin's hand and guided it downwards.

Martin gently slid his hand up and down over Adam's clothing and felt his arousal growing hard and urgent.

As his touch grew firmer Adam caught his breath.

"I want us to -"

"_I know."_ Martin replied, pulling Adam to the ground where the grass was soft and the wood was cool and shaded.

The two men lay together embracing; Martins hands slid over Adam's tattooed arms and as he touched the inked pictures he wondered how they could feel so ordinary beneath his own touch when they became so unearthly at Adam's command.

As he held him and their kisses grew deeper Adam began to pull at his clothing, not stopping until his shirt was open and he was able to run his hands over his bare chest.

"No, wait..." Martin said softly, loosening Adam's clothing and then sliding his hand inside.

Adam gave a sigh as he lay on his back in surrender to the moment as Martin touched him gently, intimately, stroking him and feeling his hardness grow more urgent.

Then Martin grabbed at his clothing and tugged sharply, exposing him as he lay there enjoying his touch.

"_Turn over." _Martin whispered.

Adam seemed confused for a moment, but as he saw the look in Martin's eyes he understood and turned over, then gave a gasp as Martin's hand slipped lower and his touch became more intimate than it had ever been before, doing deep, going gently but firmly and making him shake with the intensity of it.

Adam gave a moan as he turned his face and pressed his cheek against the coolness of the grass.

_Suddenly Martin wasn't touching him any more; instead he felt the weight of his body against him._

He gave no resistance, only tensing and giving a gasp as he was introduced to a sensation he had never felt before, then the discomfort was gone as the thought took over his mind that Martin had become one with him, their bodies had joined and as that thought stayed along with a rush of bliss that made him want to scream with every slam against his body, Adam lay helpless as he never wanted to moment to end while Martin took him forcefully, owing his body as he took his pleasure.

* * *

They were together and breathless as they lay beneath the shade of the tree. Neither man wanted to move because what they had shared had been so intense.

Martin turned on his back and drew in a deep breath.

"Was that enough pleasure for you?"

Adam turned his head and looked at him and smiled.

"More than enough." He said softly, feeling sure that on his return to his home planet he would never know the like of this kind of satisfaction again.

Then he looked up at the sky and sadness clouded his eyes.

"I wish I could stay, but it's impossible."

He had said that almost as if voicing a thought aloud that was meant only for himself.

"Why not?"

Martin looked into his lovers eyes.

"_Why not?"_ He said again.

Adam felt the weight of all he knew as if it lay heavy in his heart; i_t was strange how he had never made the connection between emotion and the heart until he had started to learn from Martin's memories – but now he thought about it all the time..._

"I can't stay."

"But you said the technology that changed your people enabled you to stay here much longer. So why can't you stay any longer than ten days?"

That look was back in Adam's eyes as he gave a heavy sigh and he looked up at the blue skies.

"It seems so perfect up there." He remarked, "But nothing ever is, Martin. This world, my world – the space that rests between- _nothing _can ever be easy _or_ easily explained. _And I would very much like to see more of your world_."

And he got up and started to get dressed.

Martin stood up and tidied his own clothing as he thought about all that Adam had said. The more he questioned him, the more he got the feeling that Adam was holding something back about the reason he couldn't stay.

But he said no more about it and they both got back into the car, and then Martin drove on towards town.

* * *

What ever thoughts had darkened Adam's mood had lifted by the time they had parked the car in town and Adam had looked with interest at the busy streets and the array of stores.

The two men began to walk down the street, going slowly as Adam looked all around him, wanting to miss nothing. Most people were in a hurry, certainly no one _else_ looked around in wonder like Adam did – but the streets and the stores were a sight everyone else saw all the time- but to Adam, it was a real glimpse of another world.

They reached the end of the street and came to a cafe.

"Let's go for a coffee." Martin said, and Adam followed him inside.

The place was half empty because it was gone lunchtime and Martin took a seat by the window and Adam sat down too. He looked across the table and smiled at him.

"People come here to sit?" He wondered, looking out the window as the world beyond the glass went on in its usual way.

"And to eat and drink." Martin told him, "But you have to pay for it. Do you have money where you come from?"

"We have currency." Adam replied.

Then he fell silent for a moment as he looked downwards and smiled.

"What?" Martin wondered.

"_I was just thinking about the sex we just shared!"_

Adam had spoken quite loudly and a few other customers turned their heads.

Martin smiled and lowered his voice.

"Adam, its not appropriate to talk about sex right now – _not_ in front of strangers."

"_But the sex was nice_."

"Pleasure." He said to him, "It was _pleasure._ That's a better word for you to use in case you say it too loud and forget where we are."

His mind still on things that made him smile, Adam recalled the memory that he was sure would make Martin feel happy.

"Does this place have a bathroom?" He wondered.

Martin indicated to a door across the other side of the room.

"The men's room is over there."

And Adam laughed quietly.

He leaned a little closer across the table and spoke discreetly, remembering this was something not everyone approved of:

"How about we go in the men's room and play the game you played with your friends? The childish one that made you smile – we could play sticky ons!"

And Martin's eyes sparkled as he laughed.

"You _saw _that when you studied my memories?"

Adam nodded.

"It looked like fun!"

Then the waitress came over.

She was a young woman with long dark hair and she smiled at Adam as she admired his toned, tattooed arms, then she looked at Martin and smiled at him too, seeming unsure which of these two guys she found the most attractive.

As Martin studied the menu Adam picked up his own although he wasn't sure what it was for.

The waitress looked back at Adam.

"What's your pleasure?" She said warmly.

Adam stared at her in surprise.

She was still smiling at him.

"What would you _like?_" She asked him, "Have you decided?"

"My pleasure is best shared with Martin." He stated, smiling as Martin's jaw dropped at his response to the question.

Then Adam spoke again:

"And what I would _like_ is to go with him into the men's room and play sticky ons. _I want us to cover the ceiling together!_"

As the waitress stared at Adam, Martin spoke up quickly.

"He's not from around here. I think he just got his words confused. We'll have two regular coffees, please."

The waitress blinked and carried on staring.

"Two coffees...please?" Martin said again, sounding as polite as he could manage without laughing.

As the waitress walked away with their order he looked down at the table and started to laugh quietly.

"You have no idea what your statement suggested!"

"I was answering her question."

Martin looked into Adam's dark eyes and saw he looked a little bewildered now.

"I know that," He told him as he tried to explain, "But she wasn't referring to _that_ kind of pleasure. Just like when she asked you what you wanted - she wanted to know what you wished to order from the _menu_."

Adam smiled as he realized his mistake.

"Perhaps I should let _you_ do the talking from now on." He said.

Martin thought about Jenny's warning that he would have been better off at home away from attention.

"That's a good idea." He told him.

After leaving the cafe a short while later, they headed back towards the car.

As they walked Adam looked around him, taking in everything, still fascinated by Martin's world. Then he paused at the gates of the local park and looked in at the wide green space surrounded by trees.

"I should like to sit here for a while." He told him.

Martin looked around; there were some people enjoying the fine weather far off on the other side of the park but that was all and as far as he was concerned, the less people who saw Adam the better - because it wasn't as if he even knew how to have an every day conversation in his world...

He walked along the path and turned off beside a pond and then they sat down together on a bench.

Adam took in a deep breath as he looked across the park and saw the humans and their children relaxing in the warm sunshine.

"I would like to do more processing." He said, "The open air energizes me and makes the whole process less tiring. This spot is ideal."

Martin glanced at his watch.

"Will this take long? They lock the gates when it gets dark."

Adam smiled and shook his head.

"I can work faster in the open air. I can absorb more of your memories and process then faster. I will not be more than two hours."

And the disk slid out from his fingertip and Martin watched as he touched it to his smallest tattoo at the top of his arm and the ink began to swirl.

Then as Adam stared blankly ahead while he watched the playback inside his mind, Martin sat next to him and gave a sigh, watching ripples on the pond as he guessed he had no choice but to wait for him, even if for the next two hours Adam would know nothing but the copied memories playing through his head.

* * *

Adam had switched with ease back into the world within his mind where Martin's memories opened up once more:

_Vern had spoken to Briggs. _

_And the Commander had told him and Martin to wait in his office while he went to fetch his son..._

As they waited, Martin looked at Vern and wondered if he was doing the right thing.

"Are you _sure_ you want to do such a big favor for this guy? He could have killed you when he turned that water back on."

Vern gave a sigh.

"He didn't set out to hurt me, he just wanted to scare me. I'm still here, I'm okay - why should he lose his place on the team? I know how I'd feel if I got kicked off the mission –I'd feel as if the biggest dream, the highest ambition I'd ever had in my life had just been snatched away."

Martin knew he was right about that, but it didn't make him feel any easier about the prospect of Nick being given a second chance.

He stepped closer to Vern and put his hand on his shoulder.

As he looked at him he noticed the bruising still livid around the small dressing above his temple - and that was all he needed to see to remind him that he was being no friend at all if he didn't speak his mind at this moment in time.

"I _know_ you're a forgiving kind of guy, I know you don't hold grudges either- and yes, maybe you _should_ have made more of an effort not to fight with him - but he hurt you, Vern! _He could do it again_."

"He won't." He said, sounding very sure of it, "I saw the look in his eyes when I spoke to him just now – he's really shocked about what happened. He doesn't have to like me to understand that his actions had consequences. I don't think he's going to cause any more trouble."

Martin gave a heavy sigh.

"It's not up to me." He said, "I just hope you're right about this decision."

Then he stepped away as Briggs came back into the room.

Nick followed him in and as he looked at Vern he looked away again, standing by his father's desk and keeping his gaze fixed to the floor.

Martin saw the look in the Commander's eyes and he guessed he had already had some sharp words with his son – and it looked as if he was about to have a few more – i_n front of Nick's colleagues..._

"I know you didn't intend to cause an accident." Briggs said as he stood before his son, "But you did and I could only react by denying you a place on this mission - because I felt your actions could not go unpunished. _And I would have done the same for anyone else on this team if they had stepped so far out of line_. "

Nick said nothing as he stood there and listened in silence.

As Martin caught the fire blazing up in Brigg's eyes he felt a little uncomfortable and he looked away and focussed his gaze on the window instead; Briggs was about to yell at his son, not in a professional capacity but as a father to a son, it was plain in his eyes and Martin wished he didn't have to be present to witness that happening.

"I gave you everything you wanted." Briggs said in a low voice as he looked into his son's eyes, _"EVERYTHING, Nick!"_

And Nick flinched on hearing that, but Briggs had not finished:

"_I gave you everything."_ He stated again, _"The best education, the best start in life – and it didn't do you any good, did it? I only helped you with your career to keep you in a job because I knew the kind of trouble you'd get into if I didn't! And you don't deserve a place on this mission. I should have thrown you off the team a long time ago. But Dr Vernon is willing to forgive what you did and that is the only reason why you have a second chance."_

And Briggs paused, taking in a deep breath as he tried to pull back his anger as he looked at his wayward son.

Martin and Vern exchanged a glance and both looked down at the floor, aware that Briggs was having the kind of talk with his son that really would have been better done in private; _Nick had been a pain in the ass but neither of them wanted to listen to any of this..._

"I've always helped you." His father stated again, "_And now it all stops_. If you want to be on this mission you'll have to work as hard as everyone else and I'm _not_ making exception for you. No more favors, have you got that?"

Nick wiped his eyes and nodded.

"Yes Dad."

"This isn't a family discussion." He reminded him.

"Yes _Sir._" Nick added, "And thank you for letting me –"

"Don't thank me!" Briggs snapped, "I'm _not_ the one who wanted to give you a second chance- one of your _colleagues_ did!"

Nick turned and looked at Vern.

"_Thanks."_ He said quietly.

Vern just nodded and looked away again.

Then Briggs turned away from his son and spoke to Martin.

"I understand you hit my son for turning on the water in the training capsule?"

Martin looked him in the eye.

"Yes I did, Sir." He stated, knowing there was no point in denying the event had taken place.

As Briggs looked back at him he had no hint of anger in his eyes now.

"_If he ever repeats that level of stupidity," _The Commander informed him, _"Feel free to hit him again."_

Martin stared at him.

Nick was looking at his Dad with a shocked expression that his Dad chose to ignore.

"That's all." Briggs added, "Get out – all three of you!"

And the three men left Brigg's office.

As Martin shut the door, Vern called to Nick, who was walking off down the corridor.

Nick briefly glanced back.

_"I'm busy."_ He stated, then he put his head down and kept on walking, wanting nothing more than to be alone right now.

* * *

Adam slid back from the memory.

He was vaguely aware on the outside in the real word that Martin was beside him, that they were sitting in the park on a bench and Martin was beside him and the sun was lower in the sky now.

He knew the ink that carried the technology that made this sight into the memory of another possible was still swirling and shifting and he took in a deep breath and went back inside the memories of Captain Martin Lee, moving forward to the next significant memories in his mind:

_It had been several days since Nick had pulled the stupid stunt with the water._

Martin had got up and got dressed and by the time he was dressed and ready to leave his room, there was till no sign of Vern - who had to pass the crash simulation test today...

Martin paused at the bathroom door and knocked.

He could hear the water running but Vern gave no reply.

"Hurry up!" Martin called out.

"_I heard you."_ Vern said, and then the shower turned off.

Martin waited outside the bathroom door.

Ten minutes later he was _still_ waiting, checking his watch - and Vern had _not_ left the room...

"Are you okay?" Martin called out.

Getting no reply, he opened the bathroom door.

His friend was half dressed now but his shirt was off and he was sitting on the floor leaning up against the wall.

_Vern was sobbing._

Martin got down on his knees beside him and grabbed him by the shoulders and gave him a gentle shake.

"What's got into you? If Briggs sees you like this –"

_"I can't do it!"_

Vern looked at him and in that second Martin saw just how terrified he was at the thought of getting back into that capsule.

"_I can't get through this, Martin!" _He said tearfully_, "I'll never get through training, I can't do it..."_

Then Martin's arms were around him as he held onto him tightly and pulled him closer.

"_Yes you can," _He whispered softly, _"You'll get through this. I won't let you give up..."_

Vern rested his head on Martin's shoulder and Martin gently stroked his hair, noticing his bruises were still showing.

"All I've ever wanted to do is get up there and see outer space." Vern said quietly, "But I never knew it would be this tough just to get off the ground. Maybe Nick's right –I'm not a military man, I'm not used to this kind of training. I don't think I can get through it. _I can't really take any more_."

Martin slid his hand around to the back of his head, looking deeply into his eyes.

"You can't give up now, you've come too far."

Vern blinked away more tears.

_"I'm scared."_

Martin kissed his cheek and hugged him.

"You _can_ do this." He said softly, "You've just got to get through it, okay?"

And he kissed his cheek again.

Vern hugged him and as their lips brushed, Vern leaned in and closed his eyes and their lips touched, then they kissed, then they kissed again, little, brief kisses that were no more than an expression of friendship and comfort at a difficult moment.

Then suddenly they were locked together and the kiss had grown deeper and Martin held him tighter as they shared the moment, both locked in a kiss and an embrace that neither man had planned.

It was Vern who pulled away first and as he did so he had a startled look in his eyes.

He laughed nervously.

"I didn't mean for that to-"

"That's okay." Martin told him, "Everything's kind of crazy today. "

"And I _really_ want Maritsa." Vern added, and Martin laughed as he offered him his hand and helped him back to his feet again.

"I know you do – who are you trying to convince, me or you?"

And the two men looked at each other and smiled, Martin's eyes sparkled with amusement as Vern blushed heavily.

Then the moment was over and Vern checked his watch and worry clouded his eyes again.

"You go over to the training area – I'll meet you there."

Martin looked at him doubtfully and then he laughed.

"If you back out of this and I come back and find you hiding under the bed, I'll drag your ass over to that capsule myself!"

Vern laughed too.

"You won't have to do that. I just need a minute to get ready for this thing."

Martin headed for the door.

"Good luck." He called back to him, then he left and headed for the training area where the others were also waiting to watch Vern pass the crash simulation test.

* * *

When Martin arrived to meet up with the others it was a relief to see that Joey and Maritsa were both there already; they had decided that after what happened, Vern would feel a lot better if he had support from the rest of the team.

Up in the control center, Briggs came out onto the open balcony and looked down.

_"Where the hell is Dr Vernon?"_

"He's on his way, Sir." Martin called up to him, hoping Vern wasn't going to back out of this.

Then the door opened and someone walked in, but it wasn't Vern.

"_He_ decided to show his face?" Murmured Maritsa.

"I'll bet he's only doing it to make himself look good in front of Daddy." Joey replied.

Nick glanced at the others and then stood by the wall, keeping a distance between himself and the rest of the group.

_They waited and the minutes ticked by._

Martin kept his eyes on the closed door, wondering if Vern was still in his room, overcome by fear at the thought of going back into that capsule again.

Then the door opened and Vern walked into the room.

Maritsa smiled as she noticed how he walked confidently towards the capsule.

"Good luck." She said to him.

He glanced back at her and returned her smile.

"Thanks but I don't think I need luck this time" He said, "I _know_ what to do."

And he looked at the others.

"Thanks for being here, guys. _This won't take long at all_..."

And he started to climb up the ladder to get into the crash simulator.

Maritsa turned to Martin.

"I can't believe how brave he's being about this!"

"I know what you mean!" Joey exclaimed, "I thought he'd be a nervous wreck after what happened."

"_So did I..."_ Martin said quietly, feeling somewhat confused as Vern took his place in the capsule and called up to Briggs.

"I'm ready to do this!" He announced, "Let's get on with it!"

The room fell silent and the time passed by.

Then as the capsule jolted violently Martin looked down at the floor, waiting for test to be over waiting for the water to start rushing in...

But the capsule remained where it was and then Briggs spoke through the intercom:

"_Congratulations Dr Vernon, you passed."_

And Vern climbed out of the capsule to applause from the rest of the group.

Maritsa hugged him, Joey patted him on the back and as he turned and looked at Martin he smiled.

"You were right, I could get through this."

And he hugged him and then let go and glanced over at Nick.

_"Congratulations."_ Nick said quietly, but stayed by the wall.

And Martin glanced again at Vern, noticing something the others had missed.

"How's your head?" He said quickly, indicating to the fading bruise.

"It's okay. I feel great!" Vern exclaimed.

"You look like you could use a lie down after all that excitement."

He discreetly tugged at his sleeve and led him over to the doorway.

"But I'm fine! Sleeps the _last_ thing I need!"

_"I'll bet!"_

Vern's eyes widened.

"What do you mean by that?"

As he spoke he glanced back at the others who were still in the training area.

"Not here." Martin said, "Let's get you back to your room."

And they went up the corridor quickly and all the while they walked, Vern insisted he felt absolutely fine...

* * *

As Martin closed the door to their living quarters and firmly locked it, Vern stared at him.

_Vern was staring at him and his eyes were like kaleidoscopes, his pupils were dilated and he was breathing heavier now..._

"What?" He demanded as he started to sweat, "I'm fine, look at me! I can do _anything_, I can take on the world, I'm Sebastian Vernon and I'm going on the Solar Four Mission, I made it! I'm going up to space, I'm going to be a hero!"

"_And you just took cocaine."_

Vern blinked and then carried on staring at him.

He sniffed and brushed a faint trace of white powder from his nose.

"No..."

Martin took in a deep breath and remembered this guy was his friend, he had been through shit, this training had been hell on earth for this guy and he had almost died because of Nick's stupid prank.

"Is this a regular thing?"

As he fixed him with a hard gaze Vern knew he had no choice but to own up.

"No! I haven't done drugs for years! But after what happened I knew I couldn't get back in that thing and pass the test without some extra help!"

Martin gave a weary sigh.

"And what are you going to do if we get up there space and have a _real _crisis?"

"I don't know!" Vern said sharply, "No one knows how they would be in real emergency until it happens! I know what to do, I just couldn't face going through all that again. I couldn't have passed without something to hold me up in there. And I _don't_ do that shit every day – my days of getting high are behind me now, this was a one off, can you understand that? _It was just a little extra to get me through when having a regular pair of balls was not enough to face the situation!_"

Martin fell silent.

Then he glanced around their shared living quarters.

"Where's the rest of it?"

Vern looked at him apologetically.

"Well I only had a tiny bit – there was enough for me to do a line and what's left isn't really much - but you can have it if you want it. I picked it up when I left the hospital before I came back to the base."

And he smiled.

Martin grabbed him by his collar and shoved him up against the wall.

"_Flush it."_ He stated.

* * *

Five minutes later Vern had retrieved the wrap of coke from its hiding place in the bottom of his overnight bag and dropped it into the toilet.

"I wasn't going to take it." He said quietly, "But you saw what I mess I was in. I couldn't have passed without it, Martin."

And then he flushed the toilet.

Martin felt relieved the evidence was gone.

He looked into the eyes of his best friend.

"You'd better hope and pray Briggs doesn't order a drugs test on us over the next few days."

"Why would he do that?" Vern wondered in alarm.

"After the booze got smuggled in I wouldn't be surprised if he did something like that." Martin reminded him.

The high was starting to wear off and now Vern looked worried.

"It won't happen" He said, "Don't even _think _about that happening..."

* * *

Adam pulled back from the memory.

He knew the sun was still out but the park was becoming silent; it would be time to go home soon.

He was briefly aware that Martin had shifted closer and had stroked the back of his neck with his fingertip and the sensation made him smile, but he was still working and he wanted to follow up on this chain of events because he was encountering something attached to this memory that intrigued him:

Martin was an honest man, he liked to play by the rules.

But sometimes he bent those rules for those he cared about. Sometimes he went to levels that he did not approve of that went against his nature, purely to protect his friend Vern.

And he wanted to know more about this, so he went on to the next significant memory:

_It was three days since Vern had passed the simulator exercise._

And now he was looking at Martin with fear in his eyes.

"I can't do it. That shit won't be out of my bloodstream yet!"

And Martin looked down at the two specimen bottles on the table; Briggs had decided to order a urine test, just as he had predicted – but it was a response to the bathroom incident and the booze being involved a few days before, he knew nothing of Vern taking drugs – but he _would_ when he got his test results back...

"_You shouldn't have done it!"_ Martin told him.

Vern looked at him with tears in his eyes.

"I couldn't get through the simulator without taking something! You know how scared I was! I tried to face it but I couldn't do it, I'm man enough to admit that to you!"

"And you're getting kicked off the team because Briggs won't let this go – you've got a history of failing drug tests, Vern."

"That was a long time ago, I was a different person then! This is the first time in ten years I've touched the shit!"

Martin looked into his eyes.

He knew Vern well enough to know when he was telling the truth and he was sure he was hiding nothing from him.

"Please help me out." Vern begged him.

_"You're an idiot."_ Martin stated.

Then he leaned forward and kissed his cheek.

"_Don't_ screw up again!" He told him, and then he picked up both specimen bottles and went alone into the bathroom.

Vern leaned against the wall and gave a sigh of relief.

"Thank you so much for doing this for me."

Martin replied from the bathroom:

"I mean what I said, Vern –no more of it! I'll make sure you don't take drugs up in space if I have to body search you myself before launch!"

And then he came out of the bathroom and handed Vern the filled bottle with his name on it.

"You wouldn't do that to me..._would you?"_ He wondered.

Martin smiled and amusement danced in his eyes.

"What do _you_ think?

And finally the anxiety disappeared from his friend's eyes.

"Thanks for helping me out." Vern said warmly.

"Keep out of trouble from now on!" Martin told him, and then he gave him a hug.

* * *

Adam took in a deep, reviving breath that helped to ease him back into the present time and place as he touched the disk in his fingertip to the tattoo and closed down the memory.

Then he opened his eyes and blinked, saw a sinking sun in a mellow sky and turned to Martin and smiled.

"You covered up the truth for your best friend." He stated, "You protected him even though you did not want to break the rules."

"Sometimes life puts you in situations like that." Martin told him, _"And when it involves people you care about, you have to bend rules, because sometimes it's the only thing your heart will allow you to do."_

"I understand that." Adam agreed, and as they got up he put his arm around Martin's waist.

Then the two men walked back towards the open gates, leaving the park and the tranquillity of it behind them.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

_It was growing dark_.

Martin felt the heat of Adams body as he lay beside him but the breeze that came in through the open window cancelled out any feeling of discomfort at his closeness on such warm night.

Adam's eyes were closed and he was sleeping deeply.

Martin turned onto his back and gave a sigh as he picked up his wallet and opened it and looked at the picture of him and Vern:

That picture had been taken one weekend when he had come over to the house.

As he looked at the picture that seemed aged and turned black and white by the moonlight that filled the room, he thought of his best friend and felt an ache in his heart as he remembered that he was gone...

_Sometimes he just got on with the day and accepted that fact._

_Other times he remembered he was dead and he wanted to sob and cry and scream and shout about it because life was so damned unfair._

It wasn't easy being the only survivor of the Solar Four tragedy.

Martin had always felt as if there had been _two_ survivors – even after the doctors had said Vern would never wake up from his coma.

As long as he had been alive, still been here in this world, Martin didn't feel quite so alone.

But knowing he was gone made his grief weigh heavier:

They were all gone but in his mind he could still see their faces and hear their voices – they had all had so much to live for and it seemed so wrong that they were gone:

_Vern had plans for his life. After the mission, he wanted to write a book._

_And Maritsa had fallen in love with him. The two of them had been so happy together._

_And Joey had loved his wife and kids so very much. He wanted to have more kids with his wife; he was looking forward to that._

_Then he thought about the Commander's son and wondered what Nick would be doing if he had survived the accident. He didn't know, but even if he hadn't changed much that young guy should still be alive, he had been the youngest member of the crew and Martin could still recall the sound of him sobbing in the moments before the cabin tore in half..._

Martin didn't want to think about the crash.

Instead he focussed his gaze on the picture of his closest friend and wondered how life would have turned out for him if the crash had never happened:

_He would have married Maritsa, he was certain of it._

Then Martin wondered: _would Vern have had kids with her? _

He smiled at that thought – his best friend, the guy who liked a drink who had _Born to Party_ tattooed on his ass _– becoming a father?_

Then Martin closed his wallet and shut his eyes and tried to block out thoughts of what might have been, because the crash had cancelled out any hopes of a future for any of them, they were all gone and nothing could bring them back.

He thought again about how he was now the _only_ survivor of the Solar Four disaster.

Then he felt the warmth of the man beside him and he moved closer to him, putting his arm around him, remembering that at least while Adam was around, he wouldn't feel totally alone, because this man knew everything he knew because he had a copy of his memories.

It helped to remember that.

_It didn't lift the grief but it helped him sleep through the rest of the night._

* * *

Morning came with sunshine in a blue sky where light clouds dotted the skyline.

This start to the day saw Martin thinking about how much time had passed by – it had gone too fast, like all of life's good times- gone too fast and then evaporated into that place that everyone wished they could reach back to eventually – _the past_.

_Adam only had three days left before his return to his home planet._

Neither man discussed that fact as they got up that morning, then Jenny said goodbye to Scott and he drove off to work and as Martin was coming down the stairs, she called to her brother.

Adam followed Martin into the kitchen looking forward to breakfast but when he saw the look in Jenny's eyes that he had come to recognize as sadness, he knew she was about to say something that would make Martin's heart ache all over again.

"Briggs called this morning."

_Briggs? It had been along time since he had heard from the Commander..._

Martin sat down at the table and Adam sat beside him.

"What did he want?" Martin wondered.

"He said there's going to be a lot of news coverage leading up to Vern's funeral and he wants you to talk to the press. It won't be until next week because the funeral is another five days away."

Hearing those words made Martins heart ache:

_Five days? Adam would be gone by then, he would be alone to face the funeral of his best friend..._

"Sure, I'll be happy to do that for Vern." He told Jenny.

Then he turned to Adam.

"There is a really difficult time coming up for me. I have to say goodbye to my closest friend, I have to talk about him to the news reporters and then later on I'm going to his funeral. It would be better if you could stay for this, for me."

And he put his hand over Adam's hand gripped it gently as he looked into his eyes.

"_Please."_

Adam looked at him with sadness down to the depths of his dark eyes.

"I can't stay. I came here to complete a mission to gather information and when that task is done I must leave. It was estimated the task would take a maximum of ten days I have orders to follow too. _Rules to obey_."

And Jenny felt her own heart aching as she recalled the price she had paid for loving her man from beyond the stars:

_It had been a love like no other, a love that had given her the gift of her son Scott, but her lover had been from another world and he had been left with no choice but to return and the same situation rested here between Adam and her brother; Adam had to go home..._

As she spoke up again she hoped what she was about to say wouldn't make her brother's heart feel even heavier.

"Briggs said Vern's name has been added to the memorial at Mission Control and there's going to be a ceremony. He wants you there to say a few words."

"When is it?"

Jenny knew Martin wouldn't like her answer.

_"This afternoon at three o'clock."_

Martin gave a heavy sigh as he shook his head.

"Why did he give me such short notice?"

Jenny hesitated, trying to answer in the kindest possible way.

"Because he knows you may not have showed up. He knows you've tried to put a distance between you and the crash, you like to keep out of the spotlight, Martin."

He looked sharply at his sister.

"Vern was still alive then! That was different! All I said back then was I never wanted to attract attention, I never got a place on that mission in the first place to look like some kind of a hero, I just wanted to do my job! And now they're all gone I'd feel wrong to sell stories about what happened. _That's_ why I stayed away from the media."

"But you'll go to the memorial ceremony?"

Martin nodded.

"Of course I will, I'll do it for Vern."

And he glanced at Adam.

"At least you're not gone home yet. You can come with me."

Again, alarm flickered in Jenny's eyes.

"Are you _sure _you want to take him with you?"

"I won't attract attention to myself." Adam promised her, then he looked at Martin.

"I didn't do anything wrong yesterday, did I?"

And Martin thought about what he had said to the waitress and smiled.

"No, you've been just fine." He replied, and Adam understood that he was choosing to lie to spare his sister any more worry, human nature and the behaviours that went with it were becoming easy to understand thanks to his glimpses into Martin's past.

"Is Scott coming?"

"No, he has an important meeting today. But he said he'll go over to the memorial and lay some flowers tomorrow. I'll come with you both."

Martin managed a smile.

"Thanks." He said, feeling sure he would not be so totally alone knowing Adam and Jenny were both there for him.

* * *

Later as they drove towards the site of the memorial, Adam sat at the back of the car beside Martin while Jenny drove and Adam watched the world go by thoughtfully as he looked out of his window, then he lowered his voice and spoke quietly to Martin.

"Do you mind if I work?"

"This journey will take just under an hour." He reminded him.

Adam touched the tattoo and activated the processor.

"I will be finished before we reach the destination." He said, then he settled back and closed his eyes while the inner world opened up and took him back into Martin's memories:

_Martin was trying to sleep._

It was the middle of the night but noise was keeping him awake, even though he had been working hard on a training exercise that day, he just couldn't get to sleep.._.because of the sounds coming through the wall from the bedroom next door..._

There was a thump as the bed knocked against the wall and then he heard Maritsa's voice:

"I told you I would see you tonight after dinner!"

"I know," Vern replied, "But I can't believe you actually want us to..."

Then there was silence, which lasted a few brief moments.

Martin heard Vern speak again:

"_ No, no... Don't do that too fast...I can't hold on too long!"_

The he heard his best friend breathing harder as started to lose control.

As Vern gave a gasp and cried out sharply, Martin rolled over and pressed his face against the pillow as he laughed into it:

All day Maritsa had been flirting with him, they had exchanged a few quietly spoken words and Vern had taken Martin aside and told him:

"_I'm finally getting somewhere with Maritsa – I'm taking her back to my room tonight, I'm going to make love to her all night long!"_

And Martin heard Vern's voice again:

"_Sorry about that, honey – I'm not usually so fast. It's just that I'm so excited and you're so beautiful and-"_

"That's okay." She said softly, "We can do it again in a few minutes, yes?"

There was a pause

"_Maybe in half an hour?"_ Vern suggested, and Martin kept his face pressed against the pillow as he laughed even harder.

He was just thankful that Vern hadn't boasted to Maritsa about his staying power...

Then Martin had laid wide awake in the darkness of his room, trying to sleep - but just as he was drifting off he heard more soft voices coming through the wall, then Maritsa gave a sigh and then the bed had hit the wall again, followed by the mattress squeaking slowly at first and then harder and faster and Martin had given a sigh, guessed he wouldn't be getting much sleep that night, and he had turned over, closed his eyes, then heard more noise, so pulled the pillow down and the covers up and tried to block it out.

_He had slept eventually..._

* * *

Martin had woken up to the sound of the door closing.

Then as he sat up he recalled what had happened and he smiled:

_His friend had finally done it; he had got the girl of his dreams..._

Then the bedroom door opened and Vern walked in.

He was up and dressed and looked wide awake and he had a sparkle in his eyes as he sat down on the bed and looked at Martin.

"How was last night?" Martin asked him, not wanting to embarrass him by explaining that he had heard every last whisper and gasp of pleasure through the thin wall...

Vern looked into his eyes.

"It was great!" He exclaimed, "She told me she loves me, she can't get enough of me, she wants us to be together all the time!"

Martin smiled.

"You've finally melted the ice queen!" He announced, and Vern laughed and the two friends hugged tightly.

_Martin was sure he had never seen his friend looking so happy..._

* * *

Adam could feel the car moving, the journey was not yet over.

He was aware that Martin was talking to his sister about how he remembered making this journey back in the old days before the mission had ended in disaster.

Adam wanted to stop the processing and join in this conversation, but he knew when they arrived at Mission Control there would be no time or opportunity to access memories because he would not be alone or have the privacy to use his built technology, so he slid into the next significant memory:

_The group were seated at the table in the dining area. _

They were celebrating the fact that the main part of the training was over and they had three weeks off before they had to come back and get ready for the mission to begin – _the launch of the Solar Four was scheduled to take place in six weeks time.._.

The wine glasses clinked together.

"To us – _all_ of us." Martin added, remembering that Nick, although not comfortable to stay around too long with the rest of the group, had made the effort to show his face that evening.

And as they drank the wine, Maritsa got her camera out.

"We should take some pictures to remember this time." She suggested.

"Oh no, I don't want to be in a picture." Nick complained, "Not right now..."

"Yes yes!" Maritsa insisted, "Here, Martin – you take one of me and Vern."

Martin had got up and stood back, looking through the lens at Maritsa in a short back dress, smiling for the camera while she sat beside Vern and held his hand. Vern had really made an effort that night in his suit and a silk tie. Just as Martin made a move to take the picture, Vern leaned in and kissed Maritsa's cheek. She laughed and so did he and that was how the picture was captured, with the two of them looking at each other, both with so much love in their eyes.

"I don't know _how_ those two got together..." Nick murmured as he sipped his wine.

"What about one of you?" Martin suggested. He saw the look on Nick's face and laughed.

"Stay like that, Nick – that's so _you_, that sulky face..."

And Nick actually cracked a smile.

"I'm _not_ sulking!" He exclaimed, and Martin pressed the button and captured Nick, looking half amused and half stunned that his picture had been taken when he really wasn't in the mood for it at all.

_"Hey Martin, do me!"_ Joey exclaimed, playfully poking out his tongue at the camera.

Martin laughed as he took the picture; didn't Joey _ever_ stop fooling around?

"Want me to take one of you?" Joey offered.

Martin laughed.

"I can do mine."

And he paused to run his fingers through his hair, then he held the camera on an angle at arms length and smiled, taking a perfect shot.

"Let's have a group picture now!" Joey said excitedly.

Martin laughed.

"So you can make more stupid faces at the camera? No, we've got the press conference coming up in a few weeks – the whole world will have pictures of us as a team then."

"I'm _really_ looking forward to that!" Vern said, "I'll feel like a _real_ space hero!"

"But darling, you're already _my_ hero!" Maritsa told him, placing her hand on his cheek and turning his face towards her as she kissed him.

Nick shook his head again.

"I don't know _how _they got together!" He exclaimed again as he watched them share a kiss...

_Adam pulled back from the memory._

As he pulled back he was aware that this was a memory significant to Martin; he often thought about this dinner and the conversation and the pictures... _it was the pictures that stayed in his thoughts most of all..._

He wondered why, searching ahead for an answer in the copy of Martin's memories:

_Then he found it._

Martin vividly recalled every picture he had captured that evening.

He recalled it because these were the _only_ unofficial pictures taken of the Solar Four crew before the mission.

_And these were the pictures that had been showed in every news paper, every TV news report about the astronauts who had died in the tragedy..._

_Vern and Maritsa would always be remembered as the lovers torn apart by tragedy._

_Joey would be remembered as the good natured family man who loved to fool around for the camera._

_And Nick would be remembered as the youngest member of the crew, barely comfortable having his picture taken..._

And that was how the world recalled them most of all, through these personal pictures taken at dinner while they were off duty...they were pictures that would forever be remembered as the last pictures taken of the members of the Solar Four mission...

Adam shut down the processor.

* * *

Martin watched as he leaned back against the seat while the ink that covered his arm swirled, then it fell still once more and Adam took in a slow, deep breath.

"We're almost there now." He reminded him.

Adam's dark eyes met with his own as he gave him a knowing smile.

"I'm aware of that, and my processing is complete for the day."

"What did you see?" Martin wondered.

It was a question that often went through his mind when he looked into the eyes of Adam, black as space and seemingly full of mysteries just as infinite.

"The people you cared about." He stated, "The rest of the crew. I saw the dinner you all shared when the pictures were taken."

Martin recalled that memory and although it had been a happy time it was now a day that would be forever tinged with sadness; those had been the _only_ off duty pictures of the whole crew together...

"I remember after the crash those pictures were all over the news, they were found in Marisa's camera that she left back at the base. I remember thinking at the time it didn't really sum them all up, do you know what I mean? There should have been so much more. Every one of them had a story to tell, but all the focus was on the disaster and not the people, it was like they came second in it all."

The car slowed and Martin reached out and showed the guard his ID.

Then the gates opened and Jenny drove inside.

As they turned into the parking area Adam noticed a far off look in Martin's eyes.

He reached over and his fingertips brushed the back of his hand.

"_You're thinking about the past again."_

Martin said nothing and nodded as he turned his head and looked far off not the distance where the launch pad stood:

_In his mind's eye he could still recall the five of them walking together towards the Solar Four._

They had all had such hopes and ambitions and thought they were stepping into a place in the history books- but for the mission, not for what had been about to unfold...

None of them had thought it could have ended in disaster, even Vern, who had been responsible for delaying the launch three times to get tech staff to double check and check again, making certain the new electrical systems were working perfectly. It wasn't that he'd had doubts, it was just his way – _he just liked to check details, sometimes to the point of obsession..._

They got out of the car and Jenny turned to start walking towards the memorial where a seating area had been set up.

Martin was still standing there, looking back towards the launch pad:

If ever there had been a time in his life when he had been sure that it was possible for ghosts to exist, that time was now:

_He was sure if he looked away then glanced back he would see them, even just for a brief second, walking towards that launch pad._

But the day was warm and the air blew around the wide, empty space swirling up dust as if to remind him there was no one else here, the launch pad was empty and he would _not_ be seeing the ghosts of his fellow crew members today...

* * *

Martin brushed down his dark suit and sat down at the front of the gathering and Jenny and Adam sat either side of him. As the crowd fell silent and Briggs began to speak about the day of the tragedy, Martin tried to listen but as he looked up at Briggs who was speaking into the microphone all he could notice was how much he had aged, how much deeper the lines had etched into his face since the death of his son:

_Loss was a terrible thing._

_Martin thought he heard Maritsa laugh and Joey say something, then as he turned his head he half expected to see Vern with his arm around Maritsa as they paused to look up at the Solar Four._

_But again he saw nothing._

Martin looked away again, barely hearing Briggs as he listened to the voices that seemed to be carried on the wind:

"_This is it, we made it!"_ Maritsa said.

"_And we're all going to make history!"_ Vern replied_, "We'll all be heroes when we get back to Earth!"_

"_I'm confident I'll be a hero." _Nick said smugly.

Then as Martin sat looking at Briggs who was still on the microphone talking about the day of the tragedy, he swore he caught a glimpse of someone standing a short distance from the crowd:

_He was in uniform and waving to him._

Martin slowly turned his head and felt tears burn at his eyes:

He often saw things that were not real when he came back here; it was the consequence of being the only survivor...

He could see a single figure standing alone, while the launch pad towered in the distance.

_It was Joey._

"Come with us!" He said enthusiastically, "This is going to be _fun!_ I _love_ space missions! Come on, Martin..."

Martin knew he wasn't real but he looked real at that moment; the wind was blowing his hair and his eyes were sparkling just like they used to when he got excited about something.

"_Come on!"_ Joey said again, _"Don't get left behind!"_

And Martin discreetly shook his head as he kept his gaze on the ghost, hallucination, projection from his imagination -or whatever he was actually looking at - then Joey Avison faded away and disappeared.

Martin took in a sharp breath and wiped his eyes.

Jenny leaned closer, noticing her brother had been looking towards the launch pad and now had tears in his eyes.

"Are you okay?" She said quietly.

Martin glanced at Adam, who was also looking at him with concern and he nodded.

"I'm fine, don't worry about me."

Then he straightened up in his chair and took a deep breath, focussing on the words spoken by Commander Briggs:

_"No one could have predicted the tragedy that happened that day. When the disaster happened we lost four exceptional people who can never be replaced – Maritsa Ivanov, Russia's finest female cosmonaut, and two astronauts, one of whom had a long and successful career of space exploration behind him - Joey Avision. And the other was Nick, my own son who wanted nothing more than to carve out a career for himself in space flight. And now Dr Sebastian Vernon, the only civilian on board, has lost his long and courageous fight for life."_

Briggs paused, taking in a deep breath before he spoke again:

_"Every one of those crew members who died left behind family and loved ones. They will never be forgotten by those who knew them and they will never be forgotten by history, either."_

And he looked over at Martin.

"_I'm now going to hand over to the only surviving crew member of the Solar Four disaster, Captain Martin Lee."_

Martin felt Adam give his hand a brief squeeze as he got up; he had spent a matter of days in this world but the knew, he understood everything now and he knew just how difficult this was for Martin to get up as the sole survivor and speak about the death of his closest friend...

Martin took his place at the microphone.

He paused for a moment, drawing in a breath as he caught a glimpse of the launch pad in the distance - but the ghosts were nowhere to be seen...

_Then he thought about his best friend._

He hadn't made any notes for this speech because he knew what he wanted to say, as far as he was concerned his biggest challenge would be to say everything in his heart with out breaking down and crying.

He didn't want to cry; he didn't want to let Vern down like that...

"_I'm sure if he could be here now,"_ Martin began, _"Vern would_ _have been very touched to think he's being treated as such a hero. That would have made him proud."_

And he looked around at the seated audience and managed a faint smile.

In that moment Jenny Hayden breathed a sigh of relief; Martin was going to get through this okay; _he was holding it together..._

"I just want to say a few words," Martin added, "About what Doctor Vernon was like as a man. He was _very_ determined to get onto the mission, he was the _only_ civilian on board and he found the training very challenging but he didn't give up, he kept going and he worked as hard for his place on the team as the rest of us did, he went through a lot to qualify for the team and he got there because he set his heart on doing it. He once said that as a boy he watched the moon landings and that was the day he knew he wanted to be up there in space some day. _He never let go of that dream_."

Martin paused again, his gaze shifted to the launch pad and at that moment he felt close to all of them, never closer – but he saw no ghosts no matter how hard he wished for it - _because at that moment even to see a glimpse would have made him feel less alone..._

"After the crash," Martin said, "We didn't give up hope because Vern was a fighter. We knew the extent of his injuries and we were told it was most likely he would never recover but everything that could possibly have been done to help him _was_ done and he lived on for three more years and in all that time, I never gave up hope for a miracle..."

And as he sat there in the audience, Adam frowned as he thought on what Martin had just said, searching for the definition of the word _miracle..._

Martin spoke again.

"If Vern had lived, he would have gone on to do some amazing things. I don't doubt that he would have learned to live with the extent of his injuries if he had made some kind of a recovery from them - he was a man who liked to live life to the full and I believe he would have tried to do that despite what the crash did to him. He would have been paralyzed and no one knows exactly how the head injury would have affected him if he had come out of the coma, but Vern would have made the most of what was left of his life. _He would have picked up the pieces some how_. "

Martin was feeling an ache in his heart now.

"As the only survivor of the disaster I often think of those who didn't survive and I wonder how things would have turned out had they lived, if the tragedy had never happened. I think Vern and Maritsa would have been very happy together, and Vern would have written a book about the Solar Four mission. And Joey Avison would have gone on to fly more missions and at the end of each mission, he would have gone home to his wife who he loved so very much and told his kids all about how exciting outer space was. And Nick Briggs; I think he would most probably still be flying space missions too. Every one of those people who died on that day left a big hole in this world and a big hole in the hearts of everyone who knew them. And Dr Sebastian Vernon was one of the nicest, kindest people I ever met in my life and I was proud to call him a friend. And I _know_ he would have been very honoured to think that his name is on this memorial. _Vern always wanted to be a hero and conquer space_."

Martin fell silent again, taking in a deep breath as his gaze shifted beyond the crowd, briefly fixing on the empty launch pad:

"Well you _are_ a hero, Vern." He said, _"You're a hero just like Maritsa and Joey and Nick. You're all heroes- and God bless every one of you."_

He knew the crowd had broken into applause and that Briggs had unveiled the monument, but as he stepped down his gaze was still on the empty launch pad.

Then he turned and looked at the names engraved on the monument and he blinked away tears:

_Vern's name was there at the bottom where there used to be an empty space; he had always known his name would be there some day and seeing it etched in stone made him feel alone now, in the way only a lone survivor could feel..._

Briggs shook his hand.

Martin turned away.

"Do you want to go home?" Jenny wondered.

Martin nodded.

As Jenny turned to walk away, Martin followed.

Adam was beside him and he glanced at him, understanding now was not a time for words because he could see the pain in Martin's eyes.

Just as they were about to head for the parking area Martin glanced over his shoulder, wondering if his mind would play tricks again.

_But the ghosts had disappeared._

They reached the car and got in and Jenny started up the engine.

Adam thought about speaking again and asking Martin if he was okay, but Martin was still saying nothing and he still had a deeply sad and haunted look in his eyes. Those eyes usually sparked when he smiled and reflected the color of clear Earth skies- but not today, and Adam knew why.

_They said nothing as they pulled away from Mission Control and drove home in silence._

* * *

As the afternoon sun sank lower in the sky, Martin sat back on his bed and thought about how difficult the day had been:

_Funerals, memorials, ceremonies to honor the dead –nothing made saying goodbye any easier..._

Adam was downstairs having dinner with Scott and Jenny.

Martin had turned down dinner, feeling as if he wanted nothing more than to be alone with his memories- because right now, he _was_ alone- he was the last one, he was the _only_ living survivor of the Solar Four disaster and when Adam left there would be no one else on earth who could understand what he had been through, who had witnessed everything, who knew how he felt...

_He would always be alone with it._

He had tried to rationalize the situation:

_The crash was an accident._

_It had been caused by a fault at launch that no one could have predicted._

_It could not have been prevented._

And in a situation like that, who lives and who dies comes down to one thing:

_Random chance._

But knowing that didn't change anything.

_Four people were gone and they were never coming back..._

Then Adam came into the bedroom and closed the door behind him.

He sat on the bed and looked into Martin's eyes.

"You feel so much regret." He said softly," I know you have pain inside your heart. But I do not have the power to grant miracles. I only have power cells for purpose of travel. I am _not_ like Scott's father- I am far from his generation and far from is capabilities. But if I could help you, I would. I wish it were possible and I am sorry it is not."

Martin saw such gentleness in his eyes and he reached out and put his arms around him and hugged him tightly.

"I wish you could stay. And I think you're the only person who can ever truly understand what I've been through."

"I would like to stay." Adam agreed as he let go of him, "But I have orders. I'm aware that rules can be bent but I have a job to do and I must take this information back home to my planet. I have two days left and then I must leave."

Those words made Martin's heart ache sharply.

"Cant you just quit your job?"

Adam blinked.

"_Quit my job?"_

"You know, resign, stop working for your boss, walk away..."

Adam thought about his suggestion.

"My role as archive specialist is highly respected." He told him, "And I have to follow guidelines."

"And I guess those guidelines don't involve quitting your job?"

Adam shook his head.

Martin thought about what he had just said.

"_Archive?_ You mean you're filing all this information about humanity _away?_ I thought it was meant for learning purposes."

"It is." Adam replied, "But Earth history has to be archived safely and preserved. It's very important that I do this."

Martin gave a sigh.

"So there's not much chance of you quitting your job any day soon?"

Adam shook his head.

"Sorry but I can't do that." He replied.

Martin nodded.

"I understand." He replied quietly.

Then Adam got up and announced he had some more processing to do.

He left the room and as the door closed Martin was sure he had never felt so alone- and he would be totally alone when Adam left; he was leaving the day after tomorrow and then the only other person who had ever known him and truly understood his memories would be gone.

Martin sat in his room and thought about it, then he walked over to the window and watched Adam far below in the garden sitting in the fading light as he accessed more of his memories.

Martin decided _not_ to go and join him - Adam would soon be gone and it seemed to make sense to get used to being alone, because soon enough, he would be completely alone with his memories and regrets and sorrows of the past – _and with Adam gone, that loneliness would last forever..._


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

There was an ache in Martins heart as he watched Adam get dressed.

The summer sky seemed to have darkened suddenly, blotting out the sun and the blue skies as storm clouds gathered.

Martin was already up and dressed, Adam had slept in late.

He didn't know what time Adam had come to bed because he had spent half the night in the garden processing memories.

"How come you had to work through the night, I thought you said you were finished for the day, you told me that yesterday before the memorial service."

"I had to cover one last aspect of your memories."

As Adam spoke he had his back to him, his gaze was fixed on the darkening skies as he ran his hand thoughtfully down is arm, briefly watching the tattoos shimmer beneath his touch.

"What last aspect?"

Martin sat down on the bed and waited for an answer but Adam was still turned away and watching the skies.

"_What last aspect, Adam?"_

Martin was starting to feel infuriated by these times when Adam seemed to slide so deep into his own thoughts he became lost in them; it wasn't so much that Martin felt he was being ignored, it was more like Adam was shutting him out and he did not know _what_ he was shutting him out from...

_"Adam?"_

Finally Adam turned and looked back at him - and as he did so, for a split second his dark eyes reflected the gathering storm clouds beyond the house.

"I was watching your weather. It is changing considerably today."

Martin shrugged.

"Well I guess it fits with my mood - I'm not exactly happy about you leaving tomorrow. "

And then his voice softened.

"_I shall miss you."_

Now Martin's own sadness reflected in Adam's eyes.

"I shall miss you too." He admitted.

But Martin hadn't given up on breaking Adams secrecy over these memories he had been watching; he wanted to know everything:

Sometimes, when he had sat alone playing back everything he had lived and remembered, Martin had felt left out in the cold because those were _his_ memories that Adam had chosen to toy with, they belonged to him and he had never stopped feeling that when it came to anything regarding those recollections; surely he had a right to know...

"You said you had to cover one last aspect of my memories - what was it?"

"_The crash."_ Adam said softly, "I saw everything, the launch, the moment when the craft was up there in space and you were all so happy to be there- and then you realized there had been a systems failure. I watched the re-entry. I saw the fear in your friend's eyes. I know you landed at speed and the cabin tore in half. _I saw it all_."

Martin gave a heavy sigh as he got up.

"You didn't need to see that."

"Yes I did." Adam told him, "It was the final piece; it made the picture whole. I needed to see the crash. I watched your friends die. I am sorry, it made me feel very sad to see these events unfold but this was a link in a chain and I had to understand it. _Links can be significant, sometimes in ways we do not realize at the time_."

There it was; Martin had that feeling again, the one that made him think perhaps Adam knew more than he was deciding to share with him.

"What was significant?" He wondered, looking hard at him, "What was significant about the crash of the Solar Four, Adam?"

And as Adam heard urgency in his voice he closed his eyes briefly as he shook his head.

When he looked back at Martin his dark eyes seemed to reflect infinity once more.

"When I first arrived you tried to explain to me about cause and effect. You said about the dominoes – one falls, the others follow... you're right about that. My people can see into future time zones, shifted dimensions – we can see what _could_ have been just as clearly as what _will_ be."

Martin caught his breath as a chill ran down his arms.

"You mean you can tell me what would have happened if they'd lived?"

Adam fell silent for a brief time, deciding it would make no difference but to add to his distress if he told him everything much sooner than he needed to know.

_So he held it back, just for a short while longer..._

"If the crash had never happened the mission would have been successful and you would have returned safely to Earth. If they had all lived, their lives would have gone on and seemingly small changes made _because_ they lived would have happened, choices, actions, deeds - it would have led to one of the crew making a significant discovery too, a discovery that would have benefited the whole of mankind- _but it wasn't to be_."

Martin stared at him.

"_Which_ member of the crew?"

And Adam just looked back at him, saying nothing.

"_Who are we talking about, Adam?"_ He demanded.

Adam gave a sigh.

"It can do no good to dwell on what could have been. The Solar four crashed and you were the only survivor. _It can't be changed_."

Martin stepped closer to him, staring at him in shock and as he spoke his voice was hushed.

"But I need to know! _Who was on board that flight that could have been so important to the world, Adam? _Which one of those people had some kind of destiny to fulfil?"

Adam shook his head.

"I've said too much." He admitted, "Now is not the time. I can't discuss this matter any further."

And Martin made a grab for his arm, but his hand closed over thin air as Adam stepped out of the doorway and headed off down the stairs.

Martin wanted to follow, but he saw no point in wasting their last day together fighting.

He sat down again and thought about the other people on the mission:

_Who had been on board that could have been so important, so significant they could have changed the world?_

He thought about each of them in turn:

_Maritsa, the Russian cosmonaut... would she have found something important up there in space?_

_Joey Avison... could Joey have made some kind of discovery?_

_Maybe Vern... was it even possible that Vern could do something so great -when he had only just got through basic safety training with the help of drugs because he was so scared?_

_Then he wondered about the Commander's son. Was it Nick? Would Nick have done something significant?_

He felt burning curiosity as he thought about all that Adam had said.

In a way, he wished he had never pushed him on this issue because now he knew only some of the picture; he needed to learn the whole of it, yet Adam was so reluctant to tell him the rest - and _that _was the part that was driving him crazy...

* * *

Martin left his room and went down stairs to find Adam.

"_Martin?"_

Jenny had caught the look in her brother's eyes and she hurried up to him, pulling him back as he made a move to wrench open the back door.

Adam was out there in the garden, taking in the fresh air as he prepared to access the last of Martin's copied memories.

"What's going on?" She demanded, "You can't change this, Martin! He _has_ to leave! You're luckier that I was; the person you came to know and love has stayed with you almost ten days! I had _three days_ with Scott's father! Three days and most of that was spent with me not understanding him, not coming to love and him and see him for the amazing person he was until it was time to say goodbye, _don't_ make my mistakes! You _have_ to accept this!"

Martin drew in a deep breath and kept his voice low.

"You don't understand, Sis. He _just told me something and there's more and he's holding it back!_"

Jenny looked at him in confusion.

"What do you mean?"

"He said things would have been different if the Solar Four hadn't crashed. He said one of the people on board would have done something significant in the future, something to change the world. And he won't tell me the rest of it! _Why is he holding back like that?_"

Jenny thought about her own man from the stars who she had loved and lost so long ago.

"I know Adam's from a future generation and he can probably see ahead and it makes sense that he would know what would have happened if they'd lived – but it can't change anything now, Martin! _They're all dead!_ I know it's hard for you to accept that and move on -"

"Move on?" He said sharply, "I've spent three years working, training fighter pilots, I left the space mission behind me a _long_ time ago!"

Jenny looked at him kindly as she spoke softly to her brother.

"But not _them_." She reminded him, "You _never _left the crew behind. I know you miss them every day. But hearing about how it could have been won't change a thing. He doesn't have the power to bring them back. _It can't happen_. And I know you often think about the fact that you're the only survivor. But it happened, Martin. Don't waste the little time you have left with him fighting over this! _Time is too short for that_."

And he looked into her eyes and knew in a heartbeat Jenny was right; Adam was leaving tomorrow and he needed to make the most of every last second with him instead of pushing for answers to questions that were pointless anyway.

"I'll wait until he's finished his work and then I'll talk to him." He agreed.

Jenny watched as Adam sat still in the garden looking off towards the darkening skies.

"Is he still processing memories? I thought he'd finished..."

"So did I." Martin replied, "And I don't know what he's watching now. I'll wait until he comes in, then I'll –"

"No more fighting!" Jenny reminded him, and Martin smiled and shook his head.

"_Then I'll tell him I want us to make the most of the time we still have together." _He told her.

* * *

Adam had shifted into the last of the collected memories associated with the Solar Four Mission.

He felt an ache in Martin's heart as the final memories appeared and came to life before his eyes as if he had stepped into his past once more:

_It was two weeks after the crash._

Martin was well enough to leave the hospital and go home to his sister.

And every newspaper he picked up, every TV news report he watched, all carried mentions of the Solar Four disaster.

He felt like he couldn't leave the house without a reminder of what had happened.

_And he thought of all of them, he thouht of them all the time:_

_Joey, Maritsa, Nick... He remembered the cabin tearing in half and shunting the front aside, then continuing up the runway and exploding in a ball of fire._

_He remembered holding onto Vern and begging him to live while he was trapped in his seat in the wreckage._

_Martin had thought about the crash every single day._

Adam shifted forward slightly, aware this was the last of the memories he had copied from Martin's mind and if he shifted forwards too quickly he would miss it and mentally hit what would feel like a brick wall:

This was the end of the line...

_He found the start of the memory and began to watch it unfold:_

Martin was sitting at Vern's bedside.

He was holding on to his hand and Vern was unresponsive, the wound to his head was heavily dressed and he was surrounded by equipment that worked to monitor his vitals signs and keep him alive.

"You have to get through this." Martin said to him quietly, "I can't be the only one left behind. We made it, Vern – you and me, we got back to Earth. The others died but we lived. There are _two _survivors from this disaster - _and I want it to stay that way_..."

Then the door opened and Martin glanced up, surprised to see Erin Avison standing there.

She looked pale and tearful and as she walked quietly over to Vern's bedside.

"How is he?"

Martin shook his head.

"They don't think he's ever going to wake up." He said quietly, "The fact that he survived the crash was as close to a miracle as we can expect – but he won't recover."

Erin looked around the room at the flowers and the cards and she blinked away tears.

"We had so many flowers for Joey we had to put a lot of them out the front of the house. People keep leaving flowers – and gifts, presents for me and the kids..."

Then she looked down at Vern and as she thought about the extent of his injuries, thoughts of Joey came to mind.

"Maybe it's a good thing Joey didn't make it." She said as her voice choked up with tears, "He wouldn't have wanted to live if he'd been as badly hurt as Vern. Joey just couldn't have carried on like that."

Then she looked into Martin's eyes and asked him the question that desperately needed answering for her own peace of mind:

"Did they suffer when the cabin exploded? I mean, was Joey still alive while it was on fire?"

And she raised her hand and wiped a tear from her face.

"No." Martin said honestly, thankful he knew enough about what had already been said about the explosion to be able to give her a truthful answer, "None of them would have suffered. The explosion killed them instantly. He wouldn't have known a thing about it."

And Erin breathed a sigh of relief.

"Thank you for telling me that."

Then her gaze briefly shifted to Vern as he lay motionless with his breathing supported by a ventilator.

"I hope he pulls through." She said quietly.

"So do I." Martin replied, then he turned back to his best friends bedside and Erin left the room.

Adam pulled back from the memory and touched the tattoo, ending the processing.

The ink swirled about on his muscular arm as the processor turned off.

Then he took in a deep breath of fresh air and thought about all he had learned from the memories of Captain Martin Lee, sole survivor of the Solar Four space disaster.

And then he turned towards the darkening, stormy skies and thoughts of home made the warmth in his heart at the notion of all things familiar grow cold:

_He had learned much on this mission._

_He had learned about himself, too._

_He had learned so much he did not want to leave._

_But he had little choice in the matter..._

* * *

Martin had left the house and was walking over to join him at the bench.

As he sat down Adam looked into his eyes and spoke apologetically.

"I'm sorry if I told you too much – sometimes it's best not to know these things – especially when it regards an alternative future that can never be."

Martin gave a sigh.

"My sister told me the same thing." He replied, "And I can understand that. I don't want to fall out with you over things that can't be changed, Adam. I just want us to make the most of the time we have left."

Sadness reflected in Adam's eyes as he thought about tomorrow.

"I wish this day would never end." He said truthfully, "Then tomorrow would never come and I would be happy."

"So you really don't want to go home?"

"I have no choice." Adam stated, "I _must_ leave tomorrow just before noon."

Now he knew the exact time he was leaving it seemed to make the very thought of his departure cause an ache to press even more sharply into his heart.

Martin reached a cross the table and took hold of his hand.

"I love you too." He said softly, "I want you to remember that and take that with you in your heart when you leave tomorrow - remember_ I love you_."

Adams eyes looked as deep as space as he slowly nodded his head.

"_I will always keep you in my heart."_ He said quietly, _"Always."_

Martin thought for a moment, then he made the only suggestion he could think of that gave him some hope for the two of them:

_"Take me with you. Take me back to your world."_

Adam shook his head.

"You would die on my planet! My species have evolved and embraced technology to survive in many kinds of places including here on Earth - but you could not live in my world. It can't be done. _I'm sorry_."

Martin remembered all Jenny had said about how time was short and they needed to make the most of it.

Now he knew his sister was right - there was no point in wasting time dwelling on what couldn't be changed...

* * *

_They all had dinner together that evening_.

Scott asked a couple of questions about when he was leaving and how he would get back home, then Jenny shot him a look and shook her head and Scott understood:

_Adam was leaving and Martin was sad about it and it was best to leave them both alone at this time..._

But Jenny did ask Adam _one _question before the end of dinner...

"Can't you change the time you leave?" She wondered, "We're having a party in the garden tomorrow – there's an asteroid skimming past Earth and it's going to make the sky go crazy colors!"

"Asteroid?" Martin wondered, feeling slightly dumb at that moment to think he had once been an astronaut yet he knew nothing of this cosmic event that was coming up.

"There's an asteroid passing unusually close to the Earth" Scott told him, "It's perfectly safe, it won't hit us or anything like that – the scientists have already done all the calculations on that risk and we are _very_ safe. But it's going to make the skies change color while it passes by and it's going to be amazing to watch."

And he looked at Adam.

"If you leave just before noon you'll miss it."

"I'm going to be _so_ busy tomorrow morning!" Jenny exclaimed, "I've got the food to buy, the tables to set up... "

And Scott smiled.

"And _yes_ Mom, I'll help!"

"I would love to stay." Adam said, "But I _have _to leave. I have no choice in the matter."

Jenny looked at him with understanding in her eyes.

"I know you have no choice." She said, "And I wish you could stay too but I understand. And I want you to know that none of us will _ever_ forget you, Adam."

And as Adam looked around the table he smiled at the humans, hiding a pain in his heart for all the things he knew that they did not and feeling sure he would never forget them either...

* * *

Night fall came and Martin lay beside Adam, wrapping his arms around him as he held onto him tightly, thinking how human this man felt - and how insane it seemed that he had to leave and go back to a place so very far away.

_"You belong here with me."_ He whispered.

Adam shifted closer and the heat of their bodies seemed to light up the night as the they kissed deeply, igniting a spark that passed between them like any other lovers who might be sharing togetherness on a night as warm as this one.

Martin kissed him deeply and ran his hands over his body, wanting to remember every single inch of him as he caressed him and let his kisses linger over the inked markings on his arms, over the smooth heat of his body, then as Adam held him tightly he returned those kisses and Martin knew with very touch, every breath and every movement of their bodies together that each moment was one that would stay in his heart forever.

But as they shared this last night the time ended all too soon as Martin turned Adam onto his back and kissed down his body and Adam surrendered, shaking as his body gleamed wet and the sheets clung damp about them.

Adam rested after this, sleeping deeply while Martin lay awake knowing he could only guess at what his lover from a world so far away could be dreaming of; sleep had divided them as sure as knowing he would be gone come morning...

* * *

Martin got up, showered and got then he dressed as the sun began to rise.

Adam was still sleeping and he paused for a moment to watch him, Adam's eyes were tightly closed and he seemed light years away as he dreamed of - what?

_Alien landscapes and a place that Martin would never get to visit?_

He was still wondering on this as he leaned over him and gently kissed his cheek.

Adam turned his head slightly but slept on.

Martin walked over to the window and looked out:

_ The morning sky was an odd shade of yellow slashed with blue. Here and there within the blue, small dark clouds were beginning to chase across the sky on a breeze that was gradually gaining in strength._

Martin thought about the asteroid that would pass so close to Earth and wondered if it would screw up the weather so badly that Jenny's party in the garden might have to be called off.

He felt sad to think that the world would be watching this event and most people would be watching it with those closest to them- because he knew he would be watching it _without_ the one he loved, by then Adam would be far from this place, across time and space, back home and that space that divided them would always ache like the chasm that seemed to open up inside his heart as he thought of the man he loved and pictured him gone.

_Then he thought about all the other losses in his life and he recalled the faces of the crew of the Solar four._

It seemed life was about loss more than it was about living these days; nothing was ever permanent; people came and went and those he loved the most were snatched away from him one way or another...

_He thought about Joey Avison's widow and wondered how she was coping without Joey._

_Then he thought of Maritsa Ivanov and felt sure her parents back in Russia still missed their daughter every day._

_He knew what losing Nick had done to Commander Briggs; that man's heart had broken on the day of the crash and he would never get over losing his only son._

_And Vern hadn't left any family behind, but he had left a best friend - and Martin knew he would miss him for the rest of his life..._

He took another look at Adam as he lay there sleeping; he looked at his face, his closed eyes and the way his chest rose and fell so peacefully.

Then he turned away and went downstairs, knowing to linger while he slept would alter nothing – _Adam would soon be gone_.

* * *

Jenny was making a list in the kitchen.

Scott was checking the freezer and telling his Mom what they already had and then reminding her what they would need to buy.

Jenny looked up from her list and smiled at Martin.

"At least you'll get to watch the sky change color with us! We can all stand together, you me and Scott."

Martin nodded.

"Sure." He said quietly, "I won't miss it, Jenny. I'll be right here."

Then Jenny offered him breakfast and Martin said he wasn't hungry.

Jenny checked her watch and called to Scott, telling him she wanted to get to town early so she could get back and start setting up the garden _exactly_ how she wanted it.

Then they were gone and Martin stood alone in the kitchen and looked out of the window as the skies turned amber and those dark clouds gathered speed as they shifted closer, gathering together looking black against the yellowed morning.

He thought about his best friend and smiled; Vern used to be fascinated by asteroids and meteors...

As he looked at that sky it brought back a fond memory as he recalled a conversation he'd shared with the others on the night before the launch:

_They had all been in the dining area, still seated at the table after dinner._

"So what are you going to do after this mission, Joey?" Martin had asked him.

"Well..." Joey said, "After _this_ mission..."

And he paused, deep in thought while the others waited for his answer.

Then Joey's eyes lit up and he smiled.

"After this mission, I want to go on _another_ mission!" He said enthusiastically.

"What about you, Nick?" Martin wondered.

Nick shrugged.

"I don't know. Maybe the same as Joey - I'm determined to make a career out of space flight."

And then he fell silent and carried on drinking his coffee.

"I'm going to write a book all about the Solar Four mission." Vern announced, "And then I'm going to marry this beautiful woman sitting beside me."

And he smiled at Maritsa, who laughed on hearing him say that.

"I won't give you my answer until we're back on Earth!" She reminded him.

"I think you'll say yes." Vern replied hopefully.

"And what about after that?" Martin wondered, "Do you think you'll go for another space mission?"

Vern looked at him doubtfully.

"The training was tough, Martin. I'm just glad I made it this time; I think six months up there will be enough for me. When I come back to earth I'll write the book and then maybe work in a different field –and do it staying on the _ground_ this time - I've always loved meteors and asteroids, they've always fascinated me."

Joey had been turned away from the conversation watching the TV and as he turned back he looked at Vern with a shocked expression on his face.

"That's always fascinated you? Why? _It's disgusting!_"

"What is?" Vern wondered.

"Haemorrhoids?" Joey exclaimed, "You just said they've always _fascinated_ you?"

"Asteroids!" Maritsa told him, and then laughter had rippled around the table as Joey's face had turned red.

"_I never heard you right...I was watching the TV..."_ He said as he continued to blush...

Martin still had a smile on his face as he thought about that memory:

_It had been the night before the launch._

_It had been their last night on Earth._

_It had also been the last night of their lives and none of them had known that as they talked so brightly about the future..._

Martin opened the kitchen door and went outside, trying to push away memories of the past because he knew pretty soon Adam would be gone and then there would be one more person he wouldcome to think of as lost to him forever.

* * *

Martin stood alone in the garden watching the yellowing sky take on a strange kind of pallor that looked almost sickly as the gathering clouds were blown about the heavens, clustering thick as the wind began to pick up.

_It seemed almost as if an artist had tried to paint a sunset and then thrown the darkest shade of grey at the canvas, spattering it, wrecking the sky that hung above the landscape..._

He had never seen a sky like this before. Although he imagined it would no doubt change later on and become the shades of beautiful color that had been predicted, right now it looked anything but beautiful:

_It looked ugly._

_It looked as if the sky had turned sick._

Martin checked his watch: it was nine a.m. now.

He turned to see Adam walking towards him and his heart felt heavy as he remembered they had but a few hours before it was time to say goodbye.

Adam walked up to him and the two men stood there, close but not touching.

Martin looked deeply into his eyes as he silently wished this man could stay forever.

Adam seemed to read those thoughts.

"I must return this information to my home planet." He told him, "I have learned much from you and your memories- thanks to this study your friends, as you recall them, will live on in our history, your memories will become an essential part of our archive on human emotion, we can learn so much from that. So much was lost after the war but now it can be relearned."

Those words brought Martin some comfort.

"I just wish..."

He reached up and gently touched Adams cheek, then as the wind blew harder he ran his fingers through his hair as their eyes met.

"I just wish you could stay. Can't you stay just a little while longer?"

Adam briefly reached up, catching Martin's hand in his grip and gently squeezing it as he felt the pain of knowing this was goodbye.

Then he let go of him and that guilt that had weighed heavy in his heart became too much to bear and he knew the time had come to give him nothing less than total honesty:

"I can not stay here." He stated, "It's not possible."

And then the words he wanted to say next felt as if they had turned to slivered glass in his throat as he fell silent and turned his eyes towards the strangely shaded skies.

"Why not?" Martin demanded, "_Why_ can't you just stay longer?"

Adam looked back at him.

"_There is no time."_ He stated.

And his eyes, dark and deep as space itself, suddenly looked saddened by something so final, so dreadful that Martin stared at him, knowing there was more, there always had been - and now he wanted the truth.

_"What is it?"_ He said in a hushed voice, _"What do you know?"_

Adam glanced briefly to the skies again, knowing what he was about to say would leave the man he loved feeling shattered.

"I planned to tell you," He said, "But I saw no reason to break this news until the time was upon us. I can not stay because I can not survive – _nothing_ can survive."

Martin stared at him.

"What do you mean, _nothing_ can survive? What are you talking about?"

Again as Adam looked at the man who had come to mean so much to him the words became stuck and he couldn't speak - and then Martin had him by his arms, shaking him as if he wanted to shake the worlds from his mouth and hear the truth.

"_If you loved me, you'd tell me!"_ Martin yelled, _"What happens, Adam?"_

And he saw the look in Adam's eyes and let him go; as he let him go Adam took in a deep breath and told him the truth:

"The asteroid is expected to pass close to the earth. _But your scientists got it wrong_. There was an error in the calculations and no one found it. The asteroid will _not_ pass by the Earth. _The asteroid will be a direct hit_."

As he took in those words, he continued to stare at Adam, now understanding why he had been so preoccupied with the skies of this planet.

"What kind of damage are talking about?" He said in a shocked voice.

"_It's the end."_ Adam said quietly, _"Your world ends at five minutes past noon today..."_


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Martin looked at Adam as the words ran through his mind again:

_Everything ended today?_

_Everything?_

"No..." He said, "No, you _can't_ let that happen!"

Adam stood in silence as the wind blew harder and the darkening clouds clustered heavy in the sickened skies above.

He thought about everything he had learned since he had come to Earth:

_He remembered what Martin had told him, that every single human life mattered._

_He remembered the dominos, how one fell and then the rest followed._

_Then he thought about a different future, the one that had never had chance to unfold._

_And then he remembered that rules could be bent._

"I do not have the power to prevent the asteroid from striking your world." He told him.

And Adam drew the spinning disk from his fingertip and touched it to his largest tattoo that opened up like a steel flower.

He took out a small glowing orb that he held cupped in his hands as it tried to zip about like a firefly.

And then he stepped closer to Martin and the light that glowed from the orb seemed to shine brighter.

"I can't stop the asteroid." He said again, "But I _can_ give you something you don't have, something that you need."

Martin looked into eyes as black and deep and infinite as space.

"What can you give me?" He asked him.

The last thing he saw was a spark of hope in Adam's eyes as he answered him with a one world reply:

"_Time."_ Said the man from the stars.

And then the spark grew brighter, covering him, blinding him with its brilliance as Martin saw nothing but light.

* * *

Martin blinked, drawing in a deep breath as that single blinding light that had covered him turned into a blackness that was punctured by more stars than he count.

_There was silence._

Martin drew in another breath.

He still couldn't hear anything.

All he could see was... _Space?_

Adam had said he used the energy cells to travel back to his own time and space.

_Time travel._

_That was it._

_Adam had sent him back to the Solar Four._

He was in the pilot's seat and looking out at vastness of space.

Below, the Earth had never looked so beautiful.

Then a voice cut through the silence, making Martin catch his breath.

_"Hey Vern,_" Said Nick, _"Congratulations –you got through launch without throwing up!"_

And the co-pilot of the Solar Four, who had been a nervous wreck since the hours leading up to the launch, turned and ran a shaking hand through his short dark hair and fixed his dark eyes on Nick Briggs.

"Don't you _ever_ shut up?"

The young guy seated at the back of the crew cabin smirked.

"We've got six whole months together_...I wonder how long you will last._.."

"Briggs!" Martin said sharply, shutting him up just as he realized this was playing out exactly as it had before...

Now Martin was staring at the man sat next to him and blinking back tears.

_Vern was alive_.

Then he slowly turned his head:

_They were all alive, Maritsa and Joey and Nick..._

_Maritsa was looking at him with a puzzled expression, wondering why he looked so emotional._

_Joey was adjusting the picture of his wife and kids._

_Nick was sitting there sulking just like before._

"Martin?"

He heard his voice and his heart was racing and all he wanted to do was turn around and grab hold of his best friend and never let him go because he was still alive...

_But there was no time._

"Martin?" Vern said again, "What are you doing?"

Martin quickly opened up the fuel controls as the conclusions drawn by the enquiry into the disaster ran through his mind:

_Instant separation from the main craft._

_Divert all power to life support and basic function._

_Jettison seventy percent of the fuel to keep the barest minimum to get back to earth and cancel out a chance of combustion on landing._

_If they'd known ten minutes before the warning light turned on, if they'd known to take those steps, they would have survived..._

Martin glanced up at the warning light:

_The light was still off. There was still time..._

As he keyed in the command and hit the button, Vern stared at him.

"What the hell are you doing, Martin? Have you gone crazy?"

Joey turned around with a worried look on his face.

"What's the matter?"

"Yes, what the hell is wrong?" Maritsa demanded.

"I just jettisoned seventy percent of the fuel. " Martin stated, "There was a burn out in the wring and it's creeping through the system, it happened on launch – loose insulation –"

"There's nothing on my screen!" Vern insisted, "It's not there!"

"It's there." Martin said, and he opened up the channel to mission control, where he saw the bewildered face of Commander Briggs.

"Captain Lee?"

"We have to turn back. There's a burn out and we can't continue. We're turning around for separation from the craft and attempting re-entry. _This is a mayday_. There's no time to explain – "

The Commander looked shocked as he stared into the screen.

"How did you find the fault so fast?"

Martin thought about it:

He had only ever wanted to do his job, he had never been in this line of work for the glory that went with it - but he knew who ever got the credit for this would be a hero when they got back to Earth...

"_It wasn't me, Sir." _He stated, _"It was Vern. Doctor Vernon found it."_

And then he killed the sound and looked up at the light:

_It was still off._

"We have to separate from the main craft." Martin said.

Vern was sitting there staring at him.

"Thanks for getting me in the shit with Briggs!" He said angrily, "You just jettisoned so much fuel we _might_ make it home – by the seat of our pants – _and_ you're dumping a space vessel that's worth a fortune and putting the blame on _me?_"

"The flight recorder will confirm everything." Martin said, "Get us separated, Vern! _DO IT!_"

But Vern hesitated as his hand hovered over his side of the controls.

"Are you sure about this?"

Martin glanced at the warning light.

_It was still off._

He looked into the eyes of his best friend, the man who had stuck by his side through twelve months of difficult training.

"_Do you trust me, Vern?"_

He looked back at him.

There was no time.

"_DO YOU TRUST ME, YES OR NO?"_ Martin yelled.

Vern looked at him and in that moment he knew Martin was right about the systems failure; he knew his best friend and it was there in his eyes, they _had_ to turn around and go home...

"_Yes."_ He stated, _"You know I trust you, Martin."_

And he tapped in a code and Martin took it from there, keying in the rest of the separation sequence.

Then Maritsa looked at Joey and he saw fear in her eyes.

"Are we going to crash land?" She wondered.

Joey reached over and gave her hand a brief squeeze.

"We'll be okay - there's no bird Martin can't fly..."

As Martin began to key in the sequence to get ready to open up the boosters, more of the scene from the other version of events played out.

Nick Briggs took off his belt and stood up with a look of panic in his eyes.

_"No way..."_ He said tearfully, _"No way am I going to die like this!"_

"SIT DOWN!"

Martin had just completed the separation from the main craft and he turned in surprise as he recalled in the other version of events, he had said that to Nick...

But not this time:

_Vern had said it instead...  
_

Then Vern unbuckled his belt, got up and walked over to Briggs and gave him a shove, slamming him back into his seat.

Nick started to cry and Vern gave his face a sharp slap.

"_There's only one girl on this mission, "_He said sharply, recalling the way Nick had tormented him during safety training, _"And she's holding herself together a lot better than you!"_

At that moment Martin noticed the Commander was speaking urgently into the screen and he turned the audio back on.

Nick was still tearful and Vern was yelling at him.

"_Buckle up, we're going home!"_ He shouted, and the Commander heard him - and so did everyone _else_ at Mission Control...

Martin glanced back to see Nick try - and fail - to close his belt, and then Vern did it for him before returning to his own seat and slamming his belt together.

"What's happening, Captain?" He said anxiously.

"We're attempting re-entry now." Martin said, and he glanced at Vern.

As he put in the co ordinates for landing his hand was steady as a rock.

It suddenly occurred to Martin that the extra few minutes in this version of events was changing everything; the light had not yet come on, they had separated from the main craft and slowed the burn out down to a crawl - and Nick had just been firmly put in his place by Vern, who was dealing with this situation with nerves of steel because those extra minutes had helped - because in that short space of time his training had kicked in along with his survival instinct.

Vern finished putting in the codes.

"She's all yours." He said to him, "Let's get out of here..."

"Not yet - divert all remaining power to life support and basic function."

Vern didn't need to question his orders now.

He put the codes in and tightened his belt.

"Done." He stated.

Martin was ready to power up for re-entry.

He glanced at his co-pilot.

"_Trust me, Vern. We'll make it."_

There was a jolt as the boosters fired up.

"I've had enough of space flight." He said as he glanced at Martin, "And assuming we get home one piece, I'm changing direction with my career." He stated, "From now on I'm staying on the ground!"

Martin was guiding the shuttle in for re-entry.

He felt a spark of hope; the light had still not come on yet...

"_It's different this time,"_ He murmured, _"Everybody lives..."_

Vern wasn't listening, he was still thinking about how this situation was one he never wanted to be in again.

"If you get us back to Earth safely I'm definitely saying on the ground from now on!" Vern said again, "I'm changing direction with my career...I'm going to have a nice cosy office and study data and satellite imagery_. I'm going to study asteroids_..."

Martin looked at Vern.

He remembered what Adam had told him, that one of the crew would do something to benefit mankind:

_It was Vern? He was going to stop the asteroid?_

_It made sense, because there would be no such thing as a missed detail with Vern on the team..._

Suddenly what Martin had just said had taken on a new significance, one of a global scale as he looked at the earth that growing closer by the minute.

"_Everybody lives..."_ He stated again, and the craft headed closer to Earth, the crew inside cushioned by the hi tech life support and the heat shields and everything else they had come to have faith in...

* * *

Re-entry began just as before:

As the craft hit the earth's atmosphere it hit it hard, jarring the cabin and shaking the bones of the people inside it.

The cabin continued to shake as the engines roared and they burned through the atmosphere.

Joey was clinging to his seat as he kept his eyes fixed on the picture of his family.

Maritsa was being shaken about like a rag doll as the craft was buffeted by the sharp re- entry.

Then cloud swirling white gave way to blue and the craft continued to shake and rattle their bones as the craft plunged down closer to land.

_The warning light was on now_.

Martin looked down at the screen and saw the communication channel was still working.

"We're locked on for Mission Control!" He said to the Commander, "I'm going to try and land... if we can't touch down in time I'll have to pull her up again..."

The Commander thought quickly.

"If you can't land you can divert to the airport six miles east of here –"

"I know the code; I'm putting it in as a secondary option, Sir." Vern said as he keyed in the coordinates and programmed the alternative flight path.

Martin looked at his best friend and smiled despite the rough flight that shook the cabin.

"Nice work."

"Thanks."

"Are you _sure_ this is your very last flight, co-pilot Vernon?" Said Martin feeling a brief flicker of amusement at how confident he had sounded all of a sudden.

Vern's smile vanished.

"I'm _very _sure." He replied, watching as the sky passed by like a blur and the runway far below began to rush closer.

"How are we doing for fuel?" Maritsa asked as she looked nervously towards Martin.

He glanced down briefly at the fuel gauge.

"We've..._still got some_."

"But how much?"

Vern glanced back at her.

"Don't ask." He said, then he saw the frightened look in her eyes and added:

"By the way, just in case we crash land - I love you."

"I love you too." She said in a hushed voice, and Martin wondered if he was about to reach for her hand just like before, but this time he just looked back at the controls and then at the approaching runway.

"We can make it." Martin said as he pulled down the gears to lower the landing wheels.

The lights flashed as the alarm sounded, warning of a malfunction.

Vern stared at the console, knowing in a heartbeat what that meant.

"_No we can't."_ He said quietly.

And all Martin could hear at the back of the cabin was the sound of the Commander's son sobbing.

_He had seconds to react._

In his mind the other set of events was playing out all over again:

_They would hit the runway at speed._

_The landing gear would not come down, the belly of the craft would smash against the ground causing a shockwave that would crack the cabin in two and the force of the drag as it skidded up the runway out of control would tear the cabin apart. _

_Maybe the back half wouldn't explode this time._

_But the cabin would still break apart in the same way, the front running into the back before the back continued half a mile up the runway; the co-pilot's side would still be crushed..._

The landing gear was jammed and they would _not_ be able to land, not here, not at this moment in time because they were coming in way too fast and if they touched down now there would only be one outcome...

Martin grabbed the controls and pulled up, sending the craft in a sharp ascent, just as it had dipped so low they were almost on the ground.

The landing strip disappeared as blue skies rushed by and Joey caught his breath and grabbed hold of his seat and Maritsa gave a gasp at the sharpness of the turn.

And then they were back in the air, passing the runway and heading onwards to the nearest airport.

Commander Briggs was looking shocked as he spoke to the pilot.

"What happened, Captain Lee?"

"The landing gear malfunctioned- we can't touch down without it, not at the speed we're going. If we crash land-"

"We have emergency services on standby!" The Commander reminded him, "Just get that bird out of the sky, Captain!"

Martin shook his head.

"Those wheels have to come down. If we hit the ground at our current speed the shock will crack the cabin. _We'll rip in half_."

And the Commander's face turned white as death as he thought about it and realized everything Martin had just said made perfect sense...

"Do what you have to do, Captain." He said quietly as his thoughts turned to his only son who was also onboard the flight, "We'll let the airport know you're on the way – and good luck."

"Thanks." Martin replied, but the channel went dead.

"That's not a good sign." Vern said as he started to break out in a sweat.

"We just need to get over to the airport and hopefully by then we'll have burned up the last of the fuel, as long as the landing wheels come down at least part of the way we stand _every_ chance of making it." Martin replied.

Then as they flew straight he looked around the cabin at then back at his best friend; if he was right about the theory he'd put together about Vern and the asteroid, he couldn't take any chances...

Martin unbuckled his seat belt and got up.

_"Switch places with me."_

Vern stared at him.

"What?"

"Switch places. Hurry up, we don't have much time! There's dual flight controls; I can fly just as well from your seat."

Vern was still staring at him.

"Its bad enough that we're probably going to crash land and most likely be killed - and now you want me to change my _seat_ too?"

Martin shook his head; they had such little time and now was not the time to be quarrelling...

"Trust me, my seat is the safest bet on this flight – you _need_ to be in that seat."

Vern glanced back at the others.

"What about everyone else? What have they got_ - the death seats?_ This is crazy, Martin!"

Nick looked towards the front of the cabin in horror.

"_Death seats?"_ He exclaimed.

Vern gave a sigh and unbuckled his belt, briefly considering slapping Nick again because his whining voice was _not_ the last thing he wanted to hear before they hit the ground...

"Okay Martin, just to make you happy I'll change places!"

And Vern looked over at Nick.

"Nobody's got a death seat." He stated, _"None of us are going to die."_

But Nick was crying again.

"What's _wrong_ with our seats?" He said tearfully, "What do you know, Martin?"

"_Nothing."_ He said as he sat down in the co-pilot's seat.

As Vern took his place in the other seat and put on his belt Martin breathed a sigh of relief; _even if they didn't all make it, assuming the scenario played out the same way if the wheels jammed a second time at least Vern would make it and go on to work in asteroid research..._

Then as he took control of the flight once more and headed towards the airport, Martin suddenly wondered if changing seats would lead to disaster:

_Everything had changed now._

_In the first version of events, they had already crashed at Mission Control by now..._

_Suddenly it felt as if he couldn't predict the future any longer; everything had changed from the minute he had gone into emergency re-entry before the warning light had come on._

_Maybe they were going to make it._

_Or perhaps the Solar Four was destined to be a tragedy that could not be avoided._

_Nothing was certain any more..._

* * *

Far below on the ground, the nearby airport was in chaos.

The building was being evacuated, planes were being moved and all flights had been cancelled.

Commander Briggs was speeding towards the scene flanked by a police escort as he thought of the crew whose lives hung in the balance, but most of all he thought of his only son as he silently prayed they would land safely...

And as the planes pulled back to clear the area, a private jet had already landed and the woman inside it was getting ready to walk down the steps and greet the sea of photographers who waited for her:

JoJo Indigo was a pop star of global fame and when she had heard her pilot ordered to _move his plane now, _she had run her manicured fingers through her waist length hair and blinked wide, surprised eyes.

"_We're not going any where!"_ She exclaimed, _"I've got the press waiting for me – and this is my jet – who do they think they are to tell us to move!"_

And as she said those words, she had no idea of the role she had just played in making history:

_Because the crowd of photographers who waited for her arrival were still there, waiting for her to leave her private jet, wondering why the airport was being rapidly cleared._

_And moments later when JoJo stepped from the plane, the photographers would be gone, rushing off to take pictures of something else._

_And that was how the fate of the Solar Four and the crew inside it would be captured and remembered by history..._

_Martin had been right._

_Everything was about to change..._

* * *

They were starting descent.

Martin was trying to pull back, trying to slow down as the failing controls continued to malfunction and the warning light stayed on.

"_I'm scared!"_ Nick said tearfully.

And at the front of the cabin, Vern kept his voice low as he gripped the seat and braced for impact.

"If he says that one more time," He said, "There _will _be a death on this flight!"

And Martin found himself briefly smiling; it was crazy but at a time like this he had actually found humor in the moment.

"I was thinking the same thing..." He murmured, "Shame you don't have time to slap him again!"

And the two men looked at each other.

Both knew this could be the end but neither wanted to let that fear slide out because they both knew it would just bring the final moments closer when everything turned to chaos in what could be the last moments of their lives.

"It's been good knowing you." Martin said quietly, "I just wanted to say that, just in case..."

Vern nodded.

"Likewise." He replied.

And Martin shifted his hand across the controls and looked into the eyes of his best friend.

Their hands touched, then briefly gripped and they both let go again.

Then Martin watched as the ground rushed closer.

"We're still going too fast." He said.

Nick was still tearful.

"_Oh shit, I don't want to die!"_ He sobbed.

And Joey kept his eyes fixed on the picture of his wife and kids.

"We won't die, Nick." He said, sounding very sure about it, "I've taken that picture of Erin and the kids on every space flight I've ever been on and it's _always_ been my lucky charm."

Maritsa was pale and looking shaken as she glanced at Nick.

"And my lucky charm is our co - pilot." She reminded him, _"I trust in him because I love him."_

Vern heard what she said and he glanced back at her.

"I wasn't expecting a compliment at a time like this!"

And she briefly smiled as her eyes reflected fear as the ground came rushing closer.

"We'll make it." She said to him, "We'll _all_ make it..."

And Martin wanted to take a last look back at all of them, just to remember them as being alive because he knew once he tried to lower the landing gear again, _everything_ rested on the gears responding –_or not_...

"If we can't get the wheels down I'll try and stay low to the ground as far as I can go before we hit." He stated, "I'll try and get us down and land somewhere suitable-"

"It's an airport." Vern reminded him, gripping his seat so tightly is knuckles were turning white, "We _have_ something useful coming up in front of us –_ it's called a runway and you might want to aim for it?"_

Martin kept his eyes fixed on the controls as his hand hovered to throw the switch.

"Well I wasn't planning on landing it on the airport roof, Vern. _Trust me, I'm a pilot_."

"_And I'm scared."_

"Nice to meet you, Scared." Martin remarked, and the two of them briefly smiled.

"How can you make a joke at a time like this?" Nick exclaimed, "We're going to crash and burn!"

"We won't burn." Martin stated, "I lost the excess fuel. We've used the rest up."

And as he said those words he knew this was it; there could be no pulling back from the ground a second time because they couldn't stay in the air any longer...

He lowered his hand and took a deep breath and threw the switch.

_And the gears malfunctioned as the ground rushed closer._

The belly of the craft was getting closer to the ground.

Martin turned off the switch.

"_We won't make it." _Vern whispered as he closed his eyes tightly and waited for impact.

"I'm not giving up." Martin said, hitting the switch again.

The warning light flickered on.

Then it flickered off and came back on again, flickering as the shaky gears started to lower, coming down halfway and then jamming.

Martin held the craft steady, hoping every single one of them had learned enough in training to get ready for the real thing - because this impact would be heavy...

* * *

_They hit the ground as the wheels bumped and collapsed, bouncing the craft and slamming it onto the runway as metal squealed and started to tear, jarring the people inside it as it skidded out of control leaving a shower of sparks in its wake._

_The cabin was shuddering and as the side began to crack the crack began to split and daylight broke through as the crashed Solar Four carried on in a skid as sparks flew from metal as the craft began to buckle and bend._

_Then as the metal began to tear the craft turned, twisting with the movement of the splitting cabin._

_And the bent and broken craft finally came to a halt..._

* * *

JoJo Indigo had just stepped off her private jet.

She stood there in a short, slashed-in-all-the-right-places dress printed with red roses.

As the wind blew her long hair and she took a step forward in her high heeled shoes, smiling as the hem of her dress brushed her toned thighs.

Then her smile vanished as she took off huge tinted lenses and saw no press to greet her.

Her gaze shifted to the crowd of photographers who had turned away, now running towards something in the distance that looked like a giant downed silver bird, it was far across the other runway and the outer shell was bent and broken and the metal looked battered and partly scorched from its rapid burn through the Earth's atmosphere.

She could still see the lettering on the side of the craft and it was still readable:

_Solar – 4_.

She hurried down the steps and over to the car that was waiting to pick her up, while her bodyguard stayed beside her, knowing there was little point warning JoJo that the crash site could be dangerous – this was something she was determined to see ...

* * *

_At the site of the wreckage, everything was silent._

Martin was still strapped into his seat.

He opened his eyes and looked around at the smashed controls and the bent up walls and the torn metal.

Then he moved cautiously and unbuckled his belt.

"_Did we make it?" _

His own voice was the only sound the broke the silence.

Martin closed his eyes as he took in a deep breath, saying a silent prayer for everything to be different this time as he wondered if fate or destiny or whatever it was that mapped out the future could ever really be changed...

Then he heard another voice break the silence.

"Joey..._Joey!_"

It was Maritsa. She looked pale and shaken and she had got free of her seat that had been set on an angle by the partly split cabin and she was shaking Joey Avison, who was still strapped in. Joey was leaning forward and his body was limp.

She shook him again.

Joey gave a gasp and sat upright, looking around with wide eyes as he took in the sight of the shattered cabin.

_"That,"_ He said, sounding stunned, _"Was one hell of a ride! It was so bumpy it knocked me out!"_

And then he laughed as he took off his belt and picked up the picture of his wife and kids.

"_That was crazy flying, Martin!"_ He exclaimed, _"I could do that again!"_

Then as he got up he felt a brief wave of dizziness and sat back down as he took in a breath.

"Are you okay?" Maritsa asked him.

He nodded and then he laughed again.

"_Wow...it actually knocked me out!"_

Martin was still in his seat.

He thought about the other outcome and remembered it was different this time..._Joey and Maritsa had made it..._

Martin looked around at the front of the cabin: Like the rest of the craft, it had buckled when the cabin started to split. But the craft was still held together and the walls had not impacted on either side of the flight controls.

He turned towards the seat beside him.

Vern was still strapped in, he wasn't moving and as Martin reached out to him he recalled the injuries his best friend had received in the other version of events.

He spoke his name and got no answer.

Martin said his name again.

And Vern slowly turned his head and looked at him.

"Is it over?" He said quietly.

Martin nodded.

"We made it."

Vern briefly closed his eyes as he gave a sigh of relief.

"I can't believe you call yourself a pilot - that was the worst landing ever, Martin!"

And as he laughed so did Martin.

Vern took off his belt and got up, following Martin around the bent up side of the craft.

"We _all_ made it?" Martin wondered.

The rest of the crew looked over to the back of the cabin, where the metal was bent and twisted and part of the wreckage blocked the view of Nick's seat.

"He's too quiet." Maritsa murmured, "I don't think he –"

And then Nick's voice cut in.

_"I can't get my belt off!"_ He whined, _"Get me out of here!"_

And the four of them stood there for a moment, relieved he was okay but all equally irritated by the sound of his whining all over again.

Martin shook his head.

"I _knew_ he wasn't cut out for this mission."

"He wasn't such a tough guy when things turned bad up there." Joey added.

Maritsa glared at the three men.

"Are you going to leave him there?"

Martin smiled.

"I'll get him out... _in a minute..._"

Joey laughed.

Vern was about to laugh too but he caught the disapproving look in Maritsa's eyes.

"I don't care how much the guy acted like a prick during training, _one_ of us has to get him out!"

"I'll do it." Vern said, and he went around the back of the cabin, ducking under the low hanging wreckage.

Nick was still in his seat and the wall beside it had partly buckled, his belt was torn and hanging by a thread.

Vern grabbed it and pulled it free.

"Come on." He said, "Get up."

Nick was still crying.

He wiped his eyes and looked up at Vern.

"_Are we back home? Are we okay?"_

Vern grabbed his arm and pulled him from his seat.

"Yes we made it. Now get out there and calm down. Try and be a man about this, Nick..."

Nick wiped his eyes again.

"_I want my Dad..."_ He said tearfully.

As Vern joined the others in the center of the wrecked interior and Nick followed, Martin looked around at the crew and the same thought ran through his mind that had first struck him when he had started the descent back to earth:

_It was different this time._

_Everybody lived..._

And what next?

_He didn't know._

_There was still an asteroid out there that was scheduled to hit Earth three years from now._

* * *

As the distant sound of sirens filled the air Martin turned to the yawning gap in the middle of the wreckage and stepped out, taking a deep breath of air and seeing sky and land and knowing for sure he had never felt so glad to be back on Earth.

Nick stepped out of the wreckage next, he looked around and saw the flashing lights and the people hurrying over to the crash site and took a step forward, hoping his Dad was on the way...

Joey walked out of the broken craft and onto the runway, smiling as he thought about what a crazy ride that had been. Then he thought about his family and knew his next move would be to grab a cell phone and call home...

Vern and Maritsa left the wreckage together.

As they stood beside the shattered Solar Four Vern looked into her eyes.

"I really need to do something." He told her.

Maritsa smiled, closing her eyes as she waited for him to take her in his arms and kiss her.

When nothing happened, she opened her eyes again, wondering where Vern had gone.

Then she looked down in surprise:

Vern was doing _exactly _what he needed to do – he was so glad to back on Earth he had fallen to knees to kiss the ground...

* * *

As the crowd gathered and the emergency vehicles came to a halt, Martin walked towards the people who were nearby and searched the sea of face but saw only cameras and heard people calling to him as the questions began.

But Martin turned his head and looked towards the skies as he thought of Adam and wondered if he would ever see him again.

And that was the picture that captured Captain Martin Lee of the Solar Four, standing with the wreckage in the background as he looked to the skies, his eyes filled with a far away look that seemed to capture the story of the harrowing flight back home...

_Joey was next to arrive on the scene._

He spotted a woman that looked like the pop star JoJo Indigo.

JoJo was standing beside the press, feeling odd to think that today no one wanted a picture of her as the attention was focussed on the Solar Four and the crash survivors.

She was holding her cell phone in her hand and about to make a call to a friend when the phone was lifted from her grasp.

"I just need to borrow this." Joey told her, "I need to call my wife."

Then one of the press tapped him on the shoulder and asked him what had happened up there.

"_I don't know!"_ Joey exclaimed_, "But it was one hell of a ride home!"_

And then he saw the cameras and he smiled happily as his picture was taken.

_Then a car screeched to a halt and Commander Briggs got out._

He saw his son wandering away from the wreckage and shoved and fought his way through the crowd, shouting his name.

Nick looked up tearfully and saw his father and ran towards him.

Commander Briggs grabbed hold of his weeping son and embraced him, thankful to hold his only child in his arms as he wept, not caring that the attention of the media was upon them.

_Vern and Maritsa walked from the crash site together._

As they walked, Maritsa slipped on some oil that had leaked from the crash site and Vern reached out and put his arm around her, catching her as she fell.

But through the lens of the waiting cameras, and framed by the slowly sinking sunset behind them, it looked as if he was sweeping her into his arms for a kiss of epically romantic proportion.

_These were the pictures that the world would see. _

_And that was how history would forever remember the crew of the Solar Four..._

* * *

Martin watched the scene unfold; everything seemed to have gone crazy all of a sudden as the press took pictures and asked questions.

Joey was too busy to respond, he was on the phone talking to his wife.

Nick was standing beside the Commander, who still had his arm around his son.

Briggs turned to Martin with gratitude shining in his eyes.

"Thank you for getting everyone home." He said.

And Martin thought about how different the other outcome had been, and he smiled as he looked over at Vern who had his arm around Maritsa as he posed for pictures, and again he thought about how Vern had always wanted to be a hero.

"Like I said, Sir," He reminded him, "It wasn't me who spotted the system failure- it was Dr Vernon."

And as Briggs turned to the press and began to talk about how Vern had been responsible for saving the lives of the crew, Martin Lee, who had never wanted to be a hero and only ever wanted to be good pilot, slipped around the back of the crowd and began to walk alone towards the airport and away from the media attention.

* * *

As Martin walked alone he thought of Adam and wondered where he was and then he wondered if he would ever see him again.

Today everything had changed; no one had died.

But he knew the world could still end three years from now and as he headed off into a future that felt uncertain, he felt sure of only one thing:

_Today had changed everything, today everyone had lived._

_Perhaps in three years time everyone would die, but that wasn't set in stone any more._

_Perhaps the world would end some day- but not right now, not today – this was the day that had changed so much:_

_Today was a day to be grateful for no matter what the future held – today, everybody had lived..._


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

_Everybody lived..._

The thought stayed with him as Martin turned over between sleeping and waking and recalled the events of the day he landed the Solar Four.

_He remembered telling Briggs everything was down to Vern._

The press had hailed him as a hero; headlines around the world had quoted the first thing Briggs had heard him yell while the Solar Four was still in up space:

_Buckle up, we're going home..._

Martin thought about the others...

_Joey had gone home to his family._

_Maritsa had married Vern._

_Nick had... what was Nick doing now? _

_He wasn't sure, but he wasn't an astronaut any more - unlike Joey Avison, who had gone on to fly more space missions and loved every minute of it..._

Martin turned over again, and then he gave a sigh as he opened his eyes.

A strange sensation was coming over him, as if the two sets of events had mixed up and lines were blurring...

_The crash had been three years ago._

Martin thought harder as he sat up and blinked, realizing he had slept in his clothes and then feeling as if he had spent the night drinking more than sleeping.

Then he saw the empty bottle on its side on the floor and in the bright light of dawn the remainder of the contents had sunk deep into the soft, expensive carpet, staining it badly...

He got up and felt a heavy weight inside his heart as he wondered if everything he had recalled about the changed events had been a dream...

No, it was too vivid, he _knew_ what had happened, _everything_ had changed because of Adam...

He could still recall both timelines, but so sharply it seemed as if everything had happened yesterday and yet at the same time the memories of the other life were fading, new memories were replacing old ones and it was confusing and he thought about Adam and knew for sure it had to be real because he had never loved another person as much as he had loved him – _it had to be real..._

Martin thought about his own life since the Solar Four – what had he been doing?

The answer came up the same as before:

_Training fighter jet pilots_.

Then he thought about Adam:

He _had_ been real, as sure as his eyes were as black and deep as space itself... _but Adam had not been around for the past three years._

Last time he had seen him had been the day the world was about to end, when Adam had give him the spark of energy, that ball of magic or science or whatever it truly was that had sent him back to the Solar Four and then everything had worked out differently...

That was how it had turned out... it _had_ to be, he couldn't imagine waking up to the breaking of a new dawn feeling as if he'd been drinking half the night to find out none of this had really happened.

_It must have been true, it had to be..._

_If it had all been a dream and Vern and the others were dead..._

_No. He couldn't face thinking about that._

Martin shook his head, closing his eyes as he took in a deep breath and tried to make sense of the feeling that he'd lived in two worlds and one had been exchanged for another.

"_Please let it be real."_ He whispered as he walked across the room and headed for the bathroom.

Then as he walked into a wall with a thump he realized the bathroom was on the _other_ side of the room.

And then he looked around and saw the stain on the carpet again - _the expensive carpet that wasn't his..._

He took a good look around the room.

_This was not his bedroom. This was a guest room in a big fancy house and..._

Memories were starting to take over, hitting him one at a time in rapid succession, it was too clear to be a dream but the pieces were not quite coming together to form the whole picture yet:

_His nephew Scott: _

_He could see him speaking on the TV. _

Scott had also been in the newspapers; he hadn't welcomed the attention and had shied away from the media as much as he could.

Vern had been completely opposite- he had posed for pictures and graced every magazine cover who wanted his story...

Martin recalled an image of Vern posing with his shirt half open, doing what he called _putting sex into science_...

He thought about the memories:

_Scott and Vern. They had done something important, something really big and..._

It happened again.

As the new memories took shape in his mind he recalled the other set of events that were growing distant but still present and clear enough to make his heart ache:

_Two timelines with different outcomes..._

And as his hand closed over the handle to open the bathroom door, he knew what lay inside that room would prove or disprove everything in a split second...

Martin opened the door.

The bathroom was big and luxurious with a marble floor and gold taps and mirrors that lined the wall.

And then he smiled because he knew for sure now; everything had happened just as he recalled it in the altered timeline, he knew for certain - because the bathroom was covered with wet toilet paper, and the culprit, who had been sleeping in the bath tub woke up as Martin walked into the room.

_"Joey!"_ Martin said warmly, recalling how things had got a bit crazy last night after the party and him and Joey had fooled around drunk playing _sticky ons..._

Joey blinked tired eyes and sat up, running his fingers through messy hair.

"That was a _great_ party!" He said.

Martin nodded.

"It was." He stated, feeling sure he was right but the memories still seemed hazy.

Joey climbed out of the bath and looked around at the state of the room.

"We _really_ messed this place up!" He exclaimed, "All I can see is toilet paper, it's everywhere!"

"_Joey?"_

They both turned to see Erin standing in the doorway.

She looked in the bathroom and then gave a sigh.

"This has to be the worst mess you've _ever_ made!" She told him.

Joey looked around the room again and nodded.

"You're right. _But Martin helped_."

And as he said those words Martin recalled it clearly:

_Last night, both drunk, the water running while they flung that paper at each other like a pair of kids..._

He laughed at the memory.

"It's all true." He agreed, "I helped to make this mess!"

And Erin looked at her husband again and her expression softened.

"Did you sleep in the bath tub _again_, Joey?"

"You know I always do that when I'm drunk at parties." He replied.

She gave a sigh and took him by the hand.

"Come on," She said, "Let's go back to bed, it's way too early to get up when your parents have the kids for the night..."

And as she led him out of the room Martin looked back at the messy bathroom and smiled:

_Now he knew for sure everything had changed just like he recalled it – and those memories were still coming at him rapidly:_

After being hailed as the hero of the Solar Four crash, Vern had written a book about the story of the crew. The book had been a massive success and then it had been made into a movie – a movie that saw him as a flawless hero who got through training with no problems, whilst managing to have a _lot_ of mind blowing sex with Maritsa, who had been portrayed as little more than eye candy - while Joey's character has been nothing like him in the fact that his IQ had grown considerably. And of course, _none_ of the fighting between Vern and Nick was mentioned at all.

_The movie had contained very little of the true story of the crew of the Solar Four, but that was because it was based on his book and he had really stretched the truth a great deal..._

But it had worked out well for Vern, he was rich now and he owned this big house that Martin had woken up in.

Then as he thought some more about his best friend he remembered how things had been so different in the other timeline and as he left his room and walked off down the hall he knew all he wanted to do was see him and reassure himself that he really _was_ okay...

* * *

He walked down the hallway, getting a strange sense of knowing this place as if he had been here many times before.

Then he knew that he had, because the new memories were sliding into place and fitting as if they had always been there. The other past was shifting back, not in a way that he would ever truly forget but in a way that made the other timeline seem more like a bad dream he could never forget.

He opened the door at the end of the hall and went inside.

And relief flooded through him as he saw his best friend sitting on the bed still in the suit he wore last night.

Vern looked slightly hungover but Martin remembered he hadn't got too drunk because it had been a night he wanted to remember forever, of course it was:

And as his best friend looked at him, Martin recalled everything and as it all became clear he knew_ exactly_ what had happened:

_Vern has spotted the error in the calculations just like he had hoped he would. That was another heroic action he had taken the credit for, and this time he had certainly deserved it._

_But although he knew the asteroid would hit, he couldn't figure out a way to stop it._

_And that was where Scott had come in._

_Scott had come into the picture because..._

Martin thought about it some more:

_It was the orb, the one his father had left for him before his birth._

_He had told Jenny when the time came he would know what to do with it._

And when the day came that the orb finally lit up and burst into life, Scott had held it in his hands and seen the truth:

_It was never intended to be a source of wisdom or miracles or proof of life beyond the stars._

_Quite simply, it was a handy tool to stop a disaster – the Starman's plan to save this planet if his son and the human scientists got together from every corner of the globe and built a missile together, a missile that was powerful enough launch before the asteroid reached the Earth's atmosphere. The design of the weapon had been a global effort and the cause had united the world._

_And the orb? _

_It was an energy cell, a piece of alien technology with kick-ass fire power, just enough to destroy the asteroid..._

_Scott and Vern had been leading the project._

_And now the asteroid was shattered and the pieces would be burning up in the atmosphere for several days to come._

Martin glanced through the doors that led out to the balcony.

Maritsa was standing there watching as the shattered fragments burned up the skies like a giant firework display.

She turned and smiled at him and then continued to watch the light show, feeling immensely proud of her husband's part in the destruction of the asteroid.

Martin walked over to Vern and sat down beside him.

"How does it feel to know you just saved the world?"

Vern smiled.

"It feels great." He replied as he reached for his coffee,"I still can't believe we actually did it – then I look out the window and I see the skies and I know it's true."

And then he sipped his coffee and quickly put it down again.

"_Why_ does he do that?" He exclaimed, "He forgot the sugar again!"

And Martin suddenly knew what he meant as a new memory slid into place and he started to laugh.

"He thinks you don't _need_ sugar," He joked, _"He thinks you're sweet just as you are, honey!"_

Vern looked at him sharply.

"He hasn't got a crush on me!"

Maritsa looked back from the balcony as her eyes sparkled with amusement.

"He has." She stated, "It's a crush. He hero worships you..."

Martin was still laughing because he knew everything now, nothing was missing - and also he remembered Nick had changed a _great_ deal after they'd made it back to Earth:

_He had decided on a change of career and his father had been very relieved about that._

_When he said he wanted to go and work for Vern, Briggs had thought it was a good idea._

_And Nick had been working for Vern for over two years now; he did everything from run security on the estate to making his coffee in the mornings..._

_Martin clearly recalled Nick as a very different person to the bully he had once been in the other timeline. After the way Vern had put him in his place when he started to fall apart on the Solar Four during the crisis, Nick looked on him as his hero..._

Vern was still complaining about the coffee.

"I can't drink this..." He said, and he hit the button and spoke into the intercom on the wall.

"Nick? This coffee is terrible, where is the sugar?"

There was a pause and then Nick spoke up:

"I'm sorry, Sir! I'll make you another one..."

Martin was still smiling as he thought about the change in the Commander's son.

Then his smile faded as he thought about the one unanswered question he still had, one that was unrelated to his friends and the new outcome in the altered future:

_Where was Adam?_

Vern caught the look in his eyes.

"What's the matter, Martin? You look a thousand miles away."

"_More like a million_." He said quietly as he thought about the man from the stars who had vanished on the day destiny had changed forever.

Then Martin asked a question.

"Does the name _Adam_ mean anything to you?"

"Adam?" Vern wondered.

"He's a friend of mine." Martin replied, "Someone I cared about very much. I just wondered if he showed up at the party last night."

Maritsa turned away from the balcony.

"What does he look like?" She wondered.

Martin felt an ache in his heart as he thought of the man who had come to mean so much to him.

"He's tall, heavily tattooed - dark eyes, built like a marine."

And Marisa smiled playfully.

"He's not one of your trainee pilots, is he Martin? Have you been taking your _work_ home with you?"

Martin shook his head.

"It doesn't matter." He told her, "I just thought he might have showed up last night."

Then the door opened and Nick came in with another cup of coffee.

He carefully set it down on the table and picked up the other one as he fixed his gaze on Vern.

"I'm sorry I forgot the sugar."

And he smiled and his gaze lingered for a few seconds.

Vern briefly returned his smile.

"That's okay, Nick. If the press call I'm not here and if anyone _else_ calls I'm not up yet, have you got that?"

Nick nodded.

"I've got it, Sir." He said warmly.

As he left the room again Maritsa giggled.

"It _is_ a crush! He smiles at you and then he carries on looking at you and..."

"I know, he _lingers _for a few seconds!" Vern replied, starting to smile as he shook his head, "But it's _not_ a crush!"

"_It is!"_ Maritsa teased him.

And Martin looked into the eyes of his best friend.

"It's been a real night to remember." He said as more of the asteroid burned up in the skies, "Congratulations, Vern."

"Thanks." He replied, and the two men embraced for a moment, then Martin let go and got up.

"I'd better got going." He told him, "I'll be over to see you again at the weekend."

"_I hope you find your friend."_ Vern said as Martin headed for the door.

* * *

As Martin walked away from the house he looked up at the skies, watching as the shattered asteroid burned up and made the sky seem alive with fireworks.

_Today the whole world was probably waking up with a hangover._

_Today everyone had something to celebrate because the Earth was no longer threatened with destruction._

He wanted to be happy but as he thought about how the pieces had all fitted together he saw the chain linking all the way back to Jenny and her man from the stars, the father of Scott, who had left the orb intending to help mankind within this altered timeline.

_Adam must have known that because he had said he could see the future._

Martin knew he ought to be grateful that the world would carry on.

But sometimes it was hard to carry on in a world that didn't have one certain person in it; like he had said to Adam, every single life mattered.

_Every single life on this planet also had a story to tell and he knew his own was one of a love lost that could never be replaced._

Martin turned the corner and headed over to the large sweeping driveway where he had parked his car the night before.

_And then he stopped walking as his heart pounded harder and tears blurred his eyes and he blinked them away, looking at the tall muscular man who was leaning against his car with his tattooed arms folded as he watched the skies with a smile on his face._

Martin walked over to the car and joined him, standing beside him as Adam's eyes stayed fixed on the shattered asteroid burning up in the sky.

_"You always knew you had the power to make this happen."_ He said quietly.

Adam was still admiring the view.

"Yes." He stated, "But I _didn't_ know I could bend the rules and change the outcome until I learned that from _you_."

And he looked away from the sky and Martin's eyes of Earth blue sky met with Adam's own dark gaze as deep as space.

"My cybernetic qualities can allow me to remain on this planet for as long as I wish." He told him, "But I had to leave, I had to take the archive home to my people. And I had to deliver a message to my employers. I'm not sure they understood it; _they will have to study the archive to find the definition._"

"What was the message?" Martin asked him, wondering how long Adam would stay this time around.

Adam smiled as his eyes reflected the sparkles in the sky.

"I told them, _I quit my job_." He replied.

Now Martin smiled too as he put his arm around him, and then the two men stood together on the day the world survived and watched as the skies lit up as if filled with fireworks, lighting the world with the kind of new hope for the future that had also lit up in the heart of Captain Martin Lee as he stood beside Adam starting this new day as they would start every day from now on; this was the end of goodbyes. From this day on, he knew for certain they would _always _be together.

The End.


End file.
